Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Are these sensory issues?

Dd8, now in a full time G&T class, is doing much better this year. She is much happier overall, participates more in class, has some friends, likes to go to school, etc... I couldn't be happier. That is until I went to school and still noticed that when they sit in a group on the floor dd still will sit all the way in the back or to the side by herself. This is something she has always done since she started school. Before this year I thought she did it bc she was bored or uninterested and daydreaming... which may be part of it. But now that she expresses herself more she tells me she doesn't like too many people around her.

And I also peeked in on her at lunch and while she was sitting at a table with other girls she was turned completely to the side so she wouldn't face them and ate that way. She has also told me she will sometimes chose to sit at a table by herself b/c it bothers her to watch others eat, says it makes her lose her appetite.

Are these sensory issues?

Maybe... or maybe she is very introverted.

Have you seen other obvious sensory issues... tags or fabric on clothes, white noise from fans, toilets, flourescent lights... food preferences... whatever? My experience is that sensory issue don't tend to be subtle.

It could also be a social anxiety issue... these seem to overlap with sensory issues. I would try to separate out the two since the approaches to dealing with them vary.

I need to be as far from a crowd as feasible and few things are as disturbing as trying to move within the same space as multiple others moving. For me it partially relates to having a poor sense of space due to limited depth perception. My son also has some problems with navigating or tracking when lots of things are moving in a larger space. It is also about the distracting small sounds of other people.

I find idiosyncratic visual things fixating and sometimes overwhelmingly distracting. And once you gain an intense focus on particular detail, it is hard to not keep getting drawn to it and the idea of it. I haven't experienced it with other people eating, but it isn't hard at all for me to imagine that.

So, from my frame of reference, then, both of those could be easily explained from cranked up senses (overexcitabilities, if you will.) That she is aware and adapts sounds resilient and likely a non-issue.

I don't think we have enough info with the little that you've told us to know if it's sensory or something else (could be vision, could be social anxiety, could be not understanding how to relate to the other children, could be introvertedness, could be a ton of different things). I think that what I'd do if it were my dd is to pay attention to how she acts around children in different settings - is she interacting with children on the playground or during project work at school? What does her teacher say? When your dd says she doesn't like to have too many people around her, is she ok with that or does she seem worried about not wanting people around her? Has she made friends at her new school?

Unless you've seen other signs of sensory issues I wouldn't necessarily think this was sensory.

Best wishes,

polarbear

@Polarbear

She interacts better one on one with kids, if it is more than one kid than she is usually left out. By left out I don't mean they purposely exclude her, she just kind of stays out of the group. I haven't really noticed anything with project work at school so I can't comment on that.

She has 2 good friends this year in her G&T class, versus last year she didn't have any friends.

She's had other signs of sensory sensitivities, the usual... toilets, clothing, loud noises, didn't like water parks until she was over 5 (would scream) and even then wouldn't go in the splash areas for little kids. When she was little she didn't like the feeling of rain on her skin. There were others I just can't remember off the top of my head. Most of these things she's grown out of. She's always just been very quirky. I.e. when she was in preschool at 3 there was a school party and while all the other kids were running around playing and chasing each other she sat at a table and kept spinning a top and watching it. She had never seen/had a top before. It's those moments that you are observing and seeing how your kid is so different from the rest of her peers and it's hard to accept. I still see how she is different even in her G&T class.

Since she was a toddler my gut has been that she may have AS, but when she tested highly gifted on the WISC (99.9%) I just figured it's her giftedness and the quirks that go with it. The psychologist didn't comment on anything that seemed out of the ordinary about her test results. She is socially odd imo, but often times I think it's b/c other kids just don't get her and her sense of humor.

It just makes me sad to see her isolate herself from others. I've posted about this before, so this isn't a new issue.


ETA: Imo she has a very unusual WISC profile, but I don't know if that really means anything.

How does she feel about it? Is she sad to be isolated? Is she happy with her choice or is something (anxiety/sensory/lack of common interests/social skills/???) holding her back from jumping in or participating when she wants to?

I ask because to my extroverted sister took decades to understand my not always wanting to be completely surrounded by people. To my introverted self however, everything was great. 1-2 close friends is perfect in my world and staying home with a good book was sometimes what I'd pick over a party which boggled her mind. Conversely when I tried to keep up with her hectic social life I eventually wanted to be at home alone after a week or so.

Have you had her evaluated for autism spectrum? The fact that she was spinning a top and ignoring other kids playing kind of jumped out at me, and then you said you suspected Aspergers when she was younger (right?). People with autism often (or probably always) have sensory issues as well as social.

DD is the same age and I think she has some issues related to auditory processing. Her OT just gave me a sensory profile (inventory) to fill out. DD is hyper-aware in terms of noises and finds just about everything distracting. Noises do not irritate her though unless she is trying to focus on something. Although when she was younger, she did go through a toilet flushing phobia because the noise was way too loud in public restrooms. If she could sit away from people when she's trying to concentrate, she would. The loud boys in the class drive her nuts (although the teachers keep saying they are under control). Even very soft noises, like people whispering, make her crazy. She has ADHD which is probably related.

I would agree that the Spectrum should be looked at. Does she display any repetitive behaviors? Make appropriate eye contact? Have more interest in objects than in people? Relate better to adults than to age peers? (Although that one could be a function of her giftedness, rather than social deficits.) Miss subtle social cues or figurative language/sarcasm?

Thanks for the extra info mountainmom - I am sorry, I have a tough time remembering the details on each of the different kids here, so I didn't remember the previous posts about your dd. I'm guessing that based on what you've added (and I went back and read a few of your previous posts) that what you are seeing *could* be sensory, or it could be something else. Our kids can be so complicated!

My one piece of advice is to not assume it's all gifted quirkiness, but I have a feeling your gut is telling you it's not. I see a whole bunch of "could be"s out there - one that hasn't been mentioned here is an undiagnosed LD - your older dd is dyslexic, isn't she? Sensory issues like you've described could also be related to vision or auditory issues. Or perhaps receptive language issues. Or social skills and understanding. It's possible that seeing a neuropsych or developmental ped might help sort through what's going on.

FWIW, my 2e ds had some similar challenges with social situations when he was the same age, and still does at times. In his case, it's related to dyspraxia combined with simply feeling out-of-sync with other kids due to his challenges. Many of the symptoms are similar to ASD symptoms. I'm not suggesting your dd is dyspraxic, just mentioning that it can be really really tough to sort out what's truly up when many challenges share common characteristics - and that's why it's good to have a professional who's looking at the whole child do an eval. I think if I described my ds on here, and asked "is it ___", I could get agreement that yes, it sounds like that - for a host of different challenges... when in fact it's been extremely helpful to have a professional help sort through and get to the real root of what's causing his specific challenges.

Hope that makes sense!

Best wishes,

polarbear

Your comment about chewing bothering your DD caught my attention, as did you saying she doesn't like to sit too close to others. (Possibly because she can hear their breathing?)

I would definitely have her tested for AS. She may just be highly-functioning and so is flying under the radar.

You may find this thread interesting: Hypersensitivity to Little Sounds

My DS, now 7, couldn't walk through a parking lot on a quiet Sunday without covering his ears when he was younger. He's outgrown that now, but I still see him covering one ear on occasion. The doctors all say he has fine hearing. When I question him about it, he just says it (the sound, sometimes too faint for me to hear), is too loud.

AS is something I believe runs on my side of the family, though nobody has admitted to it.