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Joined: Apr 2013
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somewhereonearth, is this an optional or charter school, or is it your neighborhood school? I'm not sure that makes a difference, but I'm just curious  I was also thinking about focus of the meeting a bit more - if the school's purpose in holding the meeting is to tell you they don't want your ds homeschooled, I am not sure that info about how he's performing how he *is* in their school is relevant, so in the meeting, I'd be very specific when things are brought up in terms of asking for clarity what the purpose of each talking point is - for instance, if they produce worksheets that aren't 100% correct, acknowledge what they have shown you and then clarify - what is the reason this is being discussed? Is there a concern that ds needs more help with his classwork? Is there a concern with class placement etc. None of that has anything to do with the homeschool part of his day. If they attempt to tie it into an argument against your current partial homeschooling situation, politely direct them back on track - ask them to tackle one discussion at a time, finish up the worksheet issue and they you can move on to their concerns about homeschooling (where once again, be sure they aren't mixing up unrelated issues as proof it's not working). It's so easy for meetings like this to boomerang all over the place as people start talking - so it's really important to just keep yourself nudging them back OT, one thing at a time, and don't let them confusion unrelated issues. In our state, I am required to show NOTHING to the school about progress at home. In fact, I don't even have to answer their questions. The burden is 100% on the school to demonstrate that I am failing at homeschooling. This is the same in our state too, but I think in this situation, if you are confronted with statements suggesting your partial homeschooling isn't working out satisfactorily in terms of anything *you* are doing, then it would be potentially helpful in advocating to show them proof of what your ds has learned and accomplished at home. Best wishes for your meeting! polarbear We are at a charter school. So, the meeting went very very well. I went in just prepared to discuss meeting my son's needs. I had to steer the conversation a few times back to that. But they seem to have come around to feeling much, much better about our homeschooling. So, we are now doing it with more of their "blessing". Perhaps this means that they will stop harassing us. (Based on what I hear from DS, DS has started "showing himself" more at school. I think the teachers are starting to see that truly accommodating DS at school would take far more than an "enrichment worksheet" once a week.) The big issue seems to be that the 5th grade teacher is getting cold feet about the acceleration. She is concerned that DS cannot keep up with the writing aspect (everyday math, folks). He DOES struggle with that. Mainly just with his speed of output. But the bottom line is that he has what would be an A- in the class just based on tests and quizzes. When the teacher figures in other things (minute math drills, the lack of shown work in assignments) it brings DS down to a C+. This doesn't bother DH and I in the least. But this teacher appears to be concerned and wants to send him back to 4th grade math. Our task, as we see it, is to do some hand holding with the 5th grade teacher. We've thanked her for her ability to experiment and allow DS in her class. She really likes DS and helps him out a lot. But in the grand scheme of things, we think this subject acceleration has been a great success. So what if DS can't keep up with the notetaking or cutting with scissors? He feels challenged and is enjoying himself. I can't really see the problem actually. (Pipe up friends, if you can see a problem here!)
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Joined: Oct 2011
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Thanks! Have you ever walked out of a meeting if you felt that your time was being wasted? No, but there were some early on where I probably should have, looking back in hindsight. Like most of us here, it took me several tries and finding out what strategies didn't work before I found ones that did.
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Thanks for the update somewhere - it sounds like it went really well! When the teacher figures in other things (minute math drills, the lack of shown work in assignments) it brings DS down to a C+. FWIW, I would counter the teacher's concern that this is an age-related or grade-skip issue - I suspect it's personality-related and strength-related. I am pretty danged sure she probably also has some 5th graders in the class who aren't all that verbose at explaining word problems or extremely quick on mad-minute drills. Like you, this wouldn't concern me as a parent at all. It sounds like they aren't going to push him out of his math class, so for now I'd just ignore the teachers concerns. If you want to, you could try to coach your ds at home a bit on what the teacher expects to see in answers on word problems and pay attention to make sure he's finishing all of his homework worksheets (if he has any). So what if DS can't keep up with the notetaking or cutting with scissors? Did they really bring up cutting with scissors? And are they really taking lots of notes? Both of those are things that my kids have *not* had in 5th grade classes... so I'm kinda guessing that they can't be *that* significant of an issue Pipe up friends, if you can see a problem here!) It all sounds good from here! I'm glad your meeting went well! polarbear
Last edited by polarbear; 01/10/14 12:03 PM.
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The horrors... paper cutting, coloring within lines, and five page research papers on two digit multiplication will only get worse in sixth grade. These are all critical skills to the modern job market. Standardized testing relies heavily on filling in circles. Fifth grade math teachers have long been the known guardians of the gateway to lifetime success. And the faster he goes, the harder it will be to apply brakes in time to prevent tailend collisions in college. Might as well get a copy of the worse case scenario handbook and start studying.
The above views do not represent the actual views of the writer of this post. Those responsible have been sacked.
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The horrors... paper cutting, coloring within lines, and five page research papers on two digit multiplication will only get worse in sixth grade. These are all critical skills to the modern job market. Standardized testing relies heavily on filling in circles. Fifth grade math teachers have long been the known guardians of the gateway to lifetime success. And the faster he goes, the harder it will be to apply brakes in time to prevent tailend collisions in college. Might as well get a copy of the worse case scenario handbook and start studying.
The above views do not represent the actual views of the writer of this post. Those responsible have been sacked. Hahahahahahaha! Among other complaints is that DS takes a REALLY long time to work the pencil sharpener. I am just proud of myself that I didn't laugh during the meeting - cause the teacher was dead serious on this being a "problem".
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Did they really bring up cutting with scissors? And are they really taking lots of notes? Both of those are things that my kids have *not* had in 5th grade classes... so I'm kinda guessing that they can't be *that* significant of an issue
Oh yes! They write a tremendous amount. It's kind of ridiculous. But I can't have it all my way! DS loves going to 5th grade. He grumbles about the amount of homework (also excessive - 30-40 problems a night). But it's the only homework he gets. School can't be perfect. I am certainly not going to start complaining about the amount of homework when we are looking at only about 5 months left now.
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The big issue seems to be that the 5th grade teacher is getting cold feet about the acceleration. She is concerned that DS cannot keep up with the writing aspect (everyday math, folks). He DOES struggle with that. Mainly just with his speed of output. But the bottom line is that he has what would be an A- in the class just based on tests and quizzes. When the teacher figures in other things (minute math drills, the lack of shown work in assignments) it brings DS down to a C+. This doesn't bother DH and I in the least. But this teacher appears to be concerned and wants to send him back to 4th grade math.
Our task, as we see it, is to do some hand holding with the 5th grade teacher. We've thanked her for her ability to experiment and allow DS in her class. She really likes DS and helps him out a lot. But in the grand scheme of things, we think this subject acceleration has been a great success. So what if DS can't keep up with the notetaking or cutting with scissors? He feels challenged and is enjoying himself. I can't really see the problem actually. (Pipe up friends, if you can see a problem here!) Not a problem that I can see. In fact, my perfectionist DD8 with a single grade skip + G/T class (which is advertised to represent another grade's worth of acceleration) brought home her report card last night, prompting an explanation of why her "B" grades represent a real win for her placement.
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Hahahahahahaha! Among other complaints is that DS takes a REALLY long time to work the pencil sharpener. I am just proud of myself that I didn't laugh during the meeting - cause the teacher was dead serious on this being a "problem". Well, now, really -- who doesn't? Pencil sharpeners are fun. And pencils these days are excrement. They never sharpen on both sides at the same time, no matter what kind of sharpener you use. And just when you think it's going well, the lead breaks and you have to sharpen off a bunch more. Change your IEP to include (1) mechanical pencils, or (2) a para to assist DS with the sharpening of pencils in a timely manner, or (3) the teacher provides a supply of freshly sharpened pencils on DS' desk every day.
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Joined: Feb 2011
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I enjoyed reading your update! If the teacher keeps on about her "concerns", you could suggest that you will work on it over the summer with him (I giggled to think of drilling pencil sharpening each day!)
Mom to 3 gorgeous boys: Aiden (8), Nathan (7) and Dylan (4)
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Funny because my child skipped a grade this year and currently the biggest complaint is about pencils, lack of, losing of and problems sharpening. He got 166 pencils for Christmas. Every gift he opened had pencils in addition to the real gift (as a gag). This weekend we will be sharpening a bunch.
...reading is pleasure, not just something teachers make you do in school.~B. Cleary
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