Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Parent authorization letter-- need a sample ASAP

Howler, that's fabulous news. Congrats to your DD and to you for serious problem-solving.

At what point do you have to start a new round of negotiations for accommodations? Or is that all set?

DeeDee

Good to hear it worked out.

I'd be curious to hear how you chose this educational option over the other (potential) options.

Well, it will be a matter of needing to mention that when we inform them that no, she won't be living on campus. Luckily, there is a "residential" loophole for kids who live here in town, so really, it doesn't strictly REQUIRE a 504 plan line item anyway. That's as we planned it, truly; it was certainly a factor as we began looking at full-spectrum universities. Many, many of them have gone to mandating freshman on-campus residency, which is not going to work well for someone like DD who is both very much underage (will barely be 15 next August at move-in) and also has to have a secure area to prepare her own meals where her food allergens are NEVER present, given her sensitivity to some of those allergens.

We didn't want those two things to be front-and-center socially for her in the explanation of "ohhhhh-- you don't live in the dorms? How's THAT work?"






As I've said in little bits here and there-- we had several factors to consider beyond DD's basic personality/learning style (she's socially adroit, but not very autodidactic in innate style, so a smaller kind of learning environment would be best);

A. Polymath without a clear sense of what she plans to pursue. Just that she wants to explore and choose something in each of at least a couple of diverse fields. For some time, that was pre-law and ?? and now it seems to be electrical engineering and... biophysics? math? neuroscience? psychology? She needs a place that offers a wide enough variety-- and preferably has research opportunities available in a lot of areas, so "full-service" research uni, especially since she has interests both in STEM and arts/humanities. There aren't a LOT of private college options that bridge that well.

B. Cost-- this is a factor because we are paying out of pocket, and thanks to her disability's mandates, I have not been working full time for the past decade. I can start, of course-- and that pays for her tuition. But she's keenly aware of the high costs of college. In other words, she needed a place where she didn't feel TOO much pressure to choose The Major For Me within the first six weeks, and doesn't feel CRUSHING pressure to finish in just four years (or less)... this was a major strike against HMC and MIT... and it wasn't the only one, as noted above and below... okay, so this was a point in favor of in-state tuition at a public university. Which we happen to have in our backyard, so to speak.

C. Had to be local to us (at least 1-3 hr driving distance) or we were going to have to face selling our house in a down market, and BOTH of us looking for work in a new location-- probably a LONG way from where we are now. The closest of those other schools was 7 hr by car. If DD and I moved alone, that one at least was "driving distance" but the others would have meant flights. DD has a great deal of difficulty flying-- the reality is that she would not have come home while she was in college unless "home" meant we moved to where she attended.

D. Moving away from the region would mean losing: a) knowledge of safe/safe enough restaurant options, safe brands of prepared food (about 50-60% of them are local/regional in distribution). While this doesn't sound awful this really sucks socially and convenience-wise. Learning how to eat safely again in a new geographic location 3K miles away is a tall order. It takes years to get to know how to navigate that well, and it often involves knowing which little independent stores stock which brands and sizes. This also has profound social consequences, since any offers to "go to ___________ coffeeshop/cafe/restaurant" need to be carefully weighed, and if they are truly unknown, the risk is generally not worth the immediate benefit; often the answer is "No, sorry... {excuse}" (because I need to see what all is on their menu before I can even step foot in there)




E. Honors college gets around the "needs small interactive environment" as it runs headlong into "large research institution with graduate research in multiple areas." This is one of the few programs housed in STEM-- not humanities-- colleges, meaning that there are as many STEM offerings in honors as there are humanities courses, and the quality is high. Too often the honors college is run from the liberal arts/humanities side and quality suffers in the STEM honors offerings, or there are relatively few STEM majors in the honors program. Not so here. Definite point in the program's favor.

One of the other bonuses is the one that Dee Dee asked about-- dealing with the accommodations package. We may wait until we know something more about DD's possible needs re: CTD (possible EDS) but we have dealt with the disability services/compliance office on this campus over the past ten years when my DD was doing summer programs there.

We also have one of the best specialists in the country (seriously, I think he is among the top 100, and he has known my DD since she was two), and that means that to equal her care on that front, we'd need to be near Chicago, Denver, Dallas, or in the mid-Atlantic states.

Complicated answer, I know. Idiosyncratic. The academics part of things was only about 30-40% of the input stream for decision-making.



She is comfortable on this campus-- and at 15yo, that's a big deal. She knows the town itself very well, which will help her socially with her classmates from out of the area (who don't).

Thanks for the explanation. That list of reasons looks so overwhelming, I'm surprised any other options were even in contention.

I think for young college entrants in general (even without any medical issues) there can be a strong case for staying local.

Sounds like a great solution. I'm so glad you made it work!

Me too, DeeDee.

22B, I have to be honest here and say that we do have some misgivings about not moving to Boston... hope that we're doing the right thing.

We'd joked for a long time that we were going to go with the "Eppes" model for higher ed (from Numb3rs-- because Charlie moves away with Mom to go to college since he is so underage?).

Ultimately, I thought that the costs (both financial and otherwise) of MIT/HMC were going to be too extreme in terms of pressure upon our 15yo perfectionist. I know her interior landscape better than my DH does, but he ultimately deferred to me there.

That is not to say that MIT and HMC were not on our short-list. Both institutions were very much in the top 4; my DH actually ranked MIT #1 in his mind, and I know that he was disappointed not to have an acceptance to at least hold to his heart and revel in. She didn't finish applying there, however, as she refused to go through the SAT II's that she needed, and I could hardly blame her. Our local testing coordinator made testing with accommodations nightmarish for her. Truly awful, awful stuff-- like the kinds of things that Irena posted about today. Just awful.

Reed, U of O, Macalester and UW were also on our short-list, and Brandeis and RPI were on hers, but there were flaws with all of those in one way or another.

We're HOPING that this winds up being rigorous enough for her. If it isn't, we'll move to plan B, which is for her to transfer somewhere with a bit more ooomph after a stellar freshman year.

Save MIT for grad school?

Maybe so-- probably her plan if she sticks with EE.

I agree.

And there is also the possibility to transfer to another school in two or three years if she feels she has outgrown this particular school & program. Sounds like you are making a good decision for the current situation.

I'm sorry to hear you had to experience a near panic run around. I'm afraid our family experienced far too many scenarios of thinking everything was "done" only to learn later when we checked online that something was yet needed that wasn't previously mentioned. We've learned to triple check everything involving anything to do with colleges. As has been stated, if it's a "typical" scenario they seem to do alright most of the time, however, any situation that is even a little out of the normal seems to throw them for a loop. I think often colleges will have students working in their offices who know just enough to be dangerous

I understand the thought pattern of colleges that the student needs to be the one ironing out much of what goes on with the college they'll be attending, however, often times there is too much at stake to leave it to chance in any manner. There is a time to learn hard lessons and a time to do whatever it takes to get it right. Often times a failure to iron out a matter may mean the difference of graduating in 4 years, or going another semester or year....that's a damn expensive lesson and one I don't care to absorb if I can avoid it.