Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Parent authorization letter-- need a sample ASAP

Worst case scenario. She takes a year off and reapply next year. Could she spend a year interning with her mentor while pursuing other interests and volunteering opportunities?

Her father can take a chill pill and relax.

Am I understanding the situation correct and if she got into the honors program at this university then you wouldn't need to move?

Correct-- and we can use our existing medical support team, our existing network of local connections, and (obviously) continue living and working here.

Which is why this was choice number one.

Oh, not to mention the fact that this will be around 8K a year rather than 50-60k plus living expenses.


Seriously, though, the reason that I mention that is that DD isn't 100% settled on what she wants. Could be math, biophysics, statistics, neuroscience, toxicology, or something else entirely... and at a 60K a year school, she is going to be PAINFULLY conscientious about a desire to push through and graduate in four years. We'd rather that she took five if that's what she needs in order to choose well (if not "rapidly").

Polymath/multipotentiality problem, that. So we were trying to avoid the pressure of a cross-country move and high price-tag "for her" given her innate nature-- that's too much pressure for a 15yo with some socially-prescribed perfectionism, quite frankly.


Oh, there's also an extracurricular (an unusual one) at this institution-- and also at MIT, in an odd coincidence-- where DD has been scouted by a nationally well-known coach. They produce the occasional national champ or Olympian, and my DD is apparently VERY very good at this activity. Already knowing the coach and the facility is huge for her as an introvert.

Exactly-- we never had to do a thing re: dual enrollment stuff this way.

The community college has a specific form for this when the student is below age 16. Fine-- but they have the form. They KNOW-- and always let you know right away.

I wasn't terribly surprised that they wanted something from us-- just that they said "nope, you're good-- now just wait" several times before deciding that they wanted it, ohhhh, a month ago. Surprise!

Yes, we're talking gap year-- this program is a 4yr program, so 'transfer' students come into a different track with the honors college. A gap year will put a kink in some things, and she will probably be ineligible to work with her mentor given the way that grant money supplies funding to the lab, but we'll have to see what the other options are at this point.

We're a little concerned about class size, discussion level, and teaching quality at this institution outside of that honors college. Not sure that we WILL send her there if she's not admitted.

We still expect that she will be. I have one more ace to play, but I hate to do it. We also need the extra time because they have probably never had to consider the kinds of accommodations that DD is going to need on campus. More time is better for EVERYONE there, ahead of orientation and assumptions about on-campus residency for freshman.

Oh, but if we do run through the scenarios and come up with "gap year" we'll probably be looking to move out of state and just establish residency elsewhere in the interim.

This is the best that public has to offer her here, and it's "acceptable" not anything close to-- "Wow, that's awesome."

Academically, I mean.

I can see why going to the local public university if she gets in the honors program would be a good choice at this point. No reason she has to stay all 4 years. I have known several kids who decide they didn't like where they ended up as freshman and have successfully transferred to other schools. Years & years ago my uncle went to university very early, and he spend a year at the state school before moving to Cal Tech.

As to having to 'decide' what you want to do at university. What I have noticed is private schools are often more forgiving that public schools. My local public schools really want to students to settled on a major right away, but a number of private schools don't ALLOW you to declare a major till sophomore year.

I can see why MIT would scout her. It's not unusual for MIT to admit very young college students. And it's a really fun school for the right type of person. (My kids & I got a really fun tour of the place 2 years ago by MIT professor we know.) But I admit it is very expensive, and Cambridge is pricy place to live.

What is almost beyond belief, here? The regular admissions office's requirements meant that I more or less HAD to accompany DD to campus to straighten this out.

Okay, so that fixed, we head over to the honors college, where the adcom has assured DD that all will be well once admissions has acted... that as long as we get it settled "this afternoon" (meaning Fri) that she should be able to get it sorted.

Okay, but since she's 14, the adcom at honors is-- I strongly suspect-- looking for reasons to question her maturity/independence. Me being WITH her was a problem.

Which is crazy. A snag like this-- most 17 and 18yo students would have brought a parent along, too. I wasn't even talking to them (well, at least until the adcom started taking some potshots at her over this being some kind of "lesson" for her, virtual school being the "reason" why she is graduating so "early" etc.) Yeah, at that point, yes I did point out that those statements were unwarranted assumptions. Ultimately, it wound up that well, NO, she wasn't sure that anything was going to be "fixed" at all. MAYBE early next week. As long as it was clear to both of us that they would be doing us a "big favor" in even LOOKING at her application now, since "early round slots" have been FILLED... It was surreally different from what DD had been told (in three separate conversations with the same individuals) over the phone between 9 and noon.

DD's faculty mentor (a full prof in one of the most powerful colleges on campus, and a huge women-in-STEM advocate) is meeting with her this morning... and has promised DD that she will "fix it."

I hope so. If the dean of the honors college refuses to make right the error on the part of Admissions, then the Provost probably will need to learn of it. That's been the private word from faculty and emeritus faculty in our circle of acquaintances. They are universally appalled at how DD was handled.

Honestly, I went with her because I know how administrative stuff works on campuses...

if I hadn't, I lay 80-20 odds that someone in admissions would have magically come up with "the form" that a parent would NEED to sign. (In other words, having to bring it home to us would have meant not getting it settled yesterday-- which, remember, the honors college said was the magical silver bullet to fixing this.) Either that or they'd have decided to tweak some kind of wording on her letter from us, requiring an initialing of changes. KWIM?

We discussed it, and given those odds and what she had been told on the phone, it was necessary for a parent to go with her.

Met with DD's summer internship advisor, who went to bat with THEIR dean... and it sounds as though their dean is on extremely good terms with the dean of the honors college.

Advisor clearly doesn't want to lose DD to another institution.

Update an hour later is that the dean of the honors college is going to render a decision on DD's application and they'll notify her by mail.

Now, personally, I think that they ought to let her know via e-mail given the grief that they've caused her. Oh well. We should know by the middle of next week as if all of this never happened.

(Advisor commented, when told of the "very competitive applicant pool" and "not sure they can make another slot" -- "Oh, {BS}. She WILL get in." That was a pretty great thing to hear after the Friday run-in with the adcom in Honors.)

WHEW.

She's IN!!

I feel a little bit like Dorothy waking up back in Kansas after a major detour to Oz.

DD still doesn't have her letter in hand (as promised to early applicants), so at 4:15 PM on New Year's Eve, she called and sweet talked them into telling her-- well, she actually pointed out that, like any other conscientious applicant, she NEEDED to know whether or not to pull the lever on "additional applications" prior to the deadlines at "midnight."

Apparently the dean thought it was okay to tell her in that case.

Phew! Happy New Year :-)