Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional Officially dyslexic

I just got the call from the tester. We go over full results later this week, but, as I suspected, he is indeed dyslexic. I thought I would feel relieved because the diagnosis explains so much of what I have seen, but I actually feel a little upset and surprisingly emotional about it.

i think that's totally natural - so let yourself feel it, but pretty soon you'll get to move into the "action" phase and it's bound to feel a lot better once you're really into it. all the best!

What DG said. First, need to give yourself time to process this news. Once you have processed the emotions involved you know that you and your DS will overcome this 'speed bump' in due time.

Agreed.

Oh Gabalyn - I totally know how you feel! On the one hand you're 'not crazy' on the the other hand deep down you certainly don't WANT your child to have anything 'wrong' with him/her. I have so been there. Hugs. Let me know once you've processed everything how you and your DS plan to remediate. When I was suspecting my DS has dyslexia (suspecting less and less now b/c he is reading so well and fluently), I decided to just act like he does indeed have it and treat it b/c even if he doesn't have it the interventions certainly is beneficial for everyone and can only do good (however mere "tutoring" by "reading specialists" can hurt a person with true dyslexia). However, I have had a heck of time finding accessible 'true' interventions - like certified Wilson tutors, etc. I found one but she was "under contract" by the school where she taught (AIM school) that she had to charge $90 per hour for dyslexia interventions (which a child should have twice a week) and I just couldn't pay THAT much. (I was expecting to pay between $40 and $50 per hour.) Scottish right in northeast philly area offers free, awesome intervention for dyslexia but they have waiting list and they want testing that shows that the child has dyslexia profile... plus Scottish rite is 45 minutes away AT LEAST from me (general and hour to an hour and a half depending on traffic). There are a few places that offer "tutoring" for dyslexia but I fear that it's waste if the "tutors" aren't really Wilson or otherwise certified (or so I was warned by the director at Scottish Rite).

Anyway, basically, I am curious if your tester will recommend certain places/tutors, etc. to help your DS as I know we are in the same geographical area! So let me know when you get a chance either here or pm.

Thanks, Irena! Glad to hear that your son is reading so well!

Yes, it does feel good to finally have an explanation for his weird academic profile. I didn't know about Scottish Rite. That is awesome thank you for that.

He really does read fairly well. Somewhat above grade level, I would say. His comprehension is good but if he reads aloud, he will get longer words wrong. His spelling is BAAAAD. But we have begun using Sequential Spelling (wish I had known about it before) and I think it is really helping. He is somewhat below grade level for spelling, maybe one year behind.

I did engage a tutor for awhile last summer. She used an eclectic approach that included some Wilson stuff. When I first met her, I was blithering on about stealth dyslexia, and I think she thought I was "that" mom. She actually asked me if I thought he had attentional problems because during her initial assessment, he had read a passage about monarch butterflies, and had said, "Did you know we have twenty on our dining room table right now?" He meant monarch chrysalids. We raise them every summer. But she didn't know that, and the comment made her suspect ADHD. She made a note in the assessment that he had made a random, off-topic comment.

When she got to know him better, she kept on commenting about how he was so smart that it was hard to keep him engaged. She decided to finish her work with him after a month or two since he was getting really resistant, but she ended by saying that she agreed with me that there "was something."

I'll keep you posted if I learn anything new.

Oh Gabalyn, I soooo know how you feel - sending you a hug! Also have a bit to say, but no time to say it at the moment - I'll come back.

I am glad you have the diagnosis, but I still remember (literally *years* later) when we first had a word and diagnosis to explain the troubles our ds was having.

Hang in there!

polarbear

Having a diagnosis is powerful information. It's good you have the diagnosis before the meeting. Write out a list of questions and bring them with you. Note any passing thought or concern, and go over them with the tester.

The fact that Sequential Spelling is helping is great news. We found it moved much too fast, but having some rules did help enough to bring DD up to a level where she was in view of grade level.

This is actually my guy, so I can relate. He is reading well BUT spelling is very low, makes what I think are odd mistakes with certain words, skips words and substitutes words, etc. His spelling is quite low ... I go back and forth on the dyslexia. But just recently his reading really took off and I breathed a sigh of relief. That is until I remembered what Dr. Eides says about exactly this happening in stealth dyslexia - it's a really common profile in stealth dyslexia that the gifted child can read and can even read well but still have dyslexia. Anyway, DS is being evaluated in exactly two weeks by a neuropsych ( I hope to God she is really good and can identify 2e). I am hoping to have some more clear cut answers form the eval re dyslexia, dysgraphia and dyspraxia. I am so tired of the speculation and the maybe this and maybe that (and maybe ADD)... I may very well be right here with you in a month or two. Personally, at this point I think my son has dyspraxia and dysgraphia... it's the dyslexia I am really on the fence about - and 'afraid' of in a way!

Gablyn, I here is the link the Scottish Rite place http://childrendyslexiapa.org/ I think I talked an hour with the Director, just me calling over there on a whim to see about getting intervention. She was very helpful.

Exactly!

I remember diagnoses day (all three of them) very well. The dyslexia diagnosis was the hardest. I cried in the car on the way home and felt, for a week, like I had been punched in the stomach. Then, I regrouped and read everything I could about it. What made it easier to deal with was DD's elation at finally having an explanation for her struggles.

DS4 just had his psych-ed last week. I'm not sure how I am going to last until we get the results. Psyching myself up for it this time and expecting that he will be red-flagged for it. But, this time we are coming out swinging in primary rather than feeling like horrible parents in 4th grade!

Thank you all so much!

Okay, here's a funny story. Because I have suspected this for so long, I have been reading about dyslexia for about a year. I see my son as having many of the strengths that are commonly associated with dyslexia, such as strong spatial skills and creativity. He knows I have suspected dyslexia, and I have been careful to tell him about the good things about dyslexia, as well as suggesting it might explain his troubles with reading and spelling. He now thinks of dyslexics as especially creative, talented people. So after I had the conversation with the tester today, and told him that he did indeed have dyslexia, he actually pumped his fist and shouted, "yes!"

If you need to grieve, do that. (An autism mom I respect once said, "every tear I shed for my child is another jewel in my shield." Sometimes that's how it is.)

But know this: dyslexia is remediable. You'll find a path forward, and your child will figure out how to manage. Don't worry too much about far-ahead roadblocks; solve the immediate problems as you can, and know that things will be better for your having done so.

You'll get there.

DeeDee

Love it.

I find that we walk this line regarding our DS's autism. On one hand, we have made him aware of all the voices that call autism a difference instead of a disability; he embraces this idea. On the other hand, very often the autism is truly in his way, and then it's a disability. We talk about how it can be both, and how if he works on it, the disability parts may fade, leaving him with something that's mostly just a difference. That is what we're aiming for, and how we frame it. DS is 11, so we can get that detailed.

Anyhow: yes, better to know the pros and cons than to think of oneself as damaged goods! Because it's not damage; it's how one is made, and it's fine that way, even if it brings challenges.

DeeDee