Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion OK, who suggested acting was a good idea?

I had offered my daughter a chance to go out for dancing commercials when we moved to Toronto and asked on the forum, if acting for kids was a good plan.

We have been here a month and the whole thing has taken over. First, you have to weed out the best agents, and then you have to meet with them. We just came from the top child agent, his kids work on Disney in LA besides just Canadian productions. He wants DD and I really like him but this is serious stuff. The one we saw on Tues told me that I should expect one audition a week average. This is principal roles, no extras. Though for these meetings she has had to prepare monologues and scenes and I am thinking the memorization is good brain work. They never memorize poems anymore in school.

On the other hand, this could be a really good reason to homeschool.

Digressing. Met this neighbor, who kids will be going with DD to the National ballet school. She is a physician, developmental peditrician. Argued against me about acclerating DD, even though she is already accelerated 2 years in reading and math (CTY). Then, of course, mentions that her kid is challenged academically. Isn't it sad that a developmental Peditrician can be so blind on the on side of the spectrum when she knows there has to be accomodation on the other side?

oh, wow. a friend of mine in TO had a young son who was (is?) very active in commercials/modelling in print advertising, and it was definitely 1-2 auditions a week. i thought that sounded insane, so you are not alone in that!

so sad to hear the weird bias coming from your neighbour. we heard similar things with a boatload of "experts" last year and it just breaks your heart.

but on a happier note, best of luck to your daughter at NBS!

Hmm--it seems like it could be a lot for your DD in addition to the National Ballet School? Not that I know what that entails, but I assume a lot of performances and time outside of school.

I've often thought that professional acting could be great for certain gifted kids, but it seems like you might have to homeschool for it to really work well. DD was asked to audition for a professional production based on her performance at a drama camp, but after looking at the rehearsal schedule there was no way we could do it.

I, personally, I am pretty against child acting. Local theater work? Sure, go for it. National television spots? Nope. Nope. Nope.

How many child actors can you think of that grew up to be normal, functioning adults that didn't go to jail, do drugs, become alcoholics to any other crazy nonsense? I just don't see the long-term benefit to the kids to have them on television at a young age.

You don't hear a whole lot about the ones who didn't self-destruct, though, do you?

Here are a couple off the top of my head:

http://www.amazon.com/Danica-McKellar/e/B001JP7Z7G
http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-207_162-57586847/mara-wilson-on-why-former-child-stars-go-crazy/

Fair point. I guess I just don't see the benefit still. The TV/film industry is still driven by appearances and run by narcissists. Not really an environment I want my daughter in (or my son, for that matter.) My daughter is eventually going to internalize all the bullshit they put out about body image even with all my efforts to shield her from it, but I'm going to continue to do my best to keep her separate from that.

and run by narcissists....


which does rather assume that the rest of the world is distinct from this venue. I'm increasingly convinced that this is not the case. I think that the modern world is more or less run by narcissists, myself.

I cannot disagree with this.

Interesting turn of events. After I dropped DD off at camp, I was making the 4 hour drive home and thought of a show idea, which I then emailed to a producer of 20+year animation show on TV. One of the former showrunners and directors is now in Toronto in production. He liked the idea and now I am doing the character bible. I feel so Hollywood....

Very cool for both your daughter and you! Many congratulations!

I was a SAG/Aftra children's agent many moons ago in Chicago. I really believe the self-destructive path among some child actors is in large part due to the parents and other adults around them. I had kids who were over-indulged by their parents and/or managers to get cooperation on set or in auditions. Those parents were so desperate to see their kids "succeed" that they threw any good ideas about parenting out the window. And their kids had major trouble ahead. I had other kids with balanced parents who were amazing kids- really amazing kids. Those parents didn't hesitate to yank a kid out of an audition if he was misbehaving and I respected that. I don't believe it's the spotlight that "ruins" them. I really believe it's how the adults around them treat them once that spotlight is on.

That's very cool for you Wren. I wonder about something re your dd - does *she* really want to act? Is it something she's been asking to do? Or is it something you thought of that would be fun for her? My kids have friends who enjoy acting but they've been able to enjoy it through local productions which are not huge time-sinks and don't require agents etc. Have you thought about letting your dd try out acting through a local group first before sinking a huge investment in her time and energy into the more professional route?

polarbear

My (anecdotal) impression (mostly from listening to Fresh Air) is that the actors who are the most...well-adjusted, and who go on to have successful careers as adults, focused on community theater as children. I think Polarbear asks some great questions.

I only suggested that she could go out for dancing commercials, as something to look forward to when we moved. It was a tough year, losing her father, moving from NYC to Toronto.

Then an agent I contacted, (since I know nothing about how this works) suggested this very expensive acting camp, the only opening was the first week we were here. I asked her twice, before I signed her up. Are you sure you want this? This place was not cheap but I thought it would help her with the transition. The coaches were overwhelmed with her and referred her to the agents. You cannot see a top agent without a referral. And so the process of seeing agents. DH was in local theater and to me, that is a huge time investment. You are doing a show every night and rehearsals. TV is "in and out". We had friends that did the local theater programs in NYC and that was hugely time consuming, you don't do anything else. So I think your assumption is wrong, it is actually the opposite. They have a lot of Broadway shows here and it is big for children to get on them. I will not allow that. Late nights, time investment.

But since I have to go to these meetings and I have time. I came up with these ideas and now we are developing 2 shows. I just happen to know people who connected with a top producer here and he liked my ideas. It is very much up my alley in terms of creating the documents. They are different but I worked on Wall Street and wrote documents for investments, especially an IPO. So I am working on them, since I am missing DD terribly at sleepaway camp. The producer is working on a TV movie through September and then we take what I have created and go to the next level. I kind of like this for my own career change.

I am not expecting her to make a movie with Ben Affleck or do a Disney sitcom. And I am repeating the message that most kid actors phase out and using examples. The end goal is school and options. And we do this as long as it is fun. I knew a father in NYC who had his kids do commercials and broadway. I asked me when I first suggested it to DD. He said do it as long as it is fun. He says his kids love doing it.

In my opinion and experience community theater is time consuming.

This whole board is about opportunities for our children because they are gifted. We want opportunities that challenge them, excite them, out of the normal educational options.

Yet we fight the majority of ND kids that think our kids will do just fine with everyday options. Polarbear, you sound like that majority that we fight for options for our kids. Keep her in the everyday local theater group and let her be happy. Why not give her a bigger challenge and option?

I have to agree that community theater can also be incredibly time- consuming. Though the show we looked at was semi-professional (DD would have been paid, albeit not much), the rehearsal schedule was 2-5 daily, weekends all day, twice daily weekend and daily night performances, and she would have had to miss some school for matinees. This was only for a couple of months (maybe 6 weeks?), but still.

(I imagine there are other, much less intense theater opportunities out there--just sharing what we found. This was NOT children's theater. It was a play with some children's parts.)

DH and I both have friends in the business (both TV/commercial screen acting and also theater) and I have to agree that the theater commitment is WAY more time-consuming.

Unless you're talking about a "career" of film acting, or you are on a long-running series that has a grueling filming schedule, community theater is probably a lot more time-intensive than what Wren seems to be doing with her DD.

I'm glad that she's enjoying it so much, Wren!

Wren,

How exciting! I'm glad your DD is having fun with the acting and you are too. We took DS to an open cattle-casting call this summer, since we both were curious what it would be like. It was not for him, but he thought it was interesting anyway.

Your DD has been performing for several years already in dance. I think adding acting would be fun for her, and I know you are not the type to push her into this if she doesn't want to do it. Your DD has always been pretty driven all on her own.

Thanks everyone. Who knows how it turns out. I am just getting into this show development. I am finding that challenging and exciting.

I think that gifties do benefit from changing careers.