Lori, the only thing I've got is this. When our DS worries excessively about the future, we note that it may be just as he predicts; or may be considerably better; or worse. But we don't know yet, and there's no point trying to solve problems that aren't here yet. What we have is this moment, now; and we are fortunate to have each other, and a good home, enough to eat, access to medical care. We'll do our best with what we have when it becomes clear what we're up against.
It is hard for perfectionists to become resigned to the imperfections of the future; but worrying sure doesn't make any of it better. Surgeons rarely recommend a surgery unless they think it will actually improve things. Sometimes you have to do your best to choose your people, then trust your people.
I hope the surgery goes well, and that the outcome is easier to live with than he thinks.
DeeDee
ps ETA: one more thought that has gotten me through some bad stuff: How you feel about something may or may not reflect reality. Feelings don't always correspond to an accurate assessment of the facts; it's best to notice that so that you don't get sucked in by negative ones...
Last edited by DeeDee; 06/12/13 03:10 PM.
