Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional UPDATE - IEP help - academics, PDD-NOS, allergies

I like DeeDee's advice about setting a timer and giving him 3 minutes to talk about how it's not fair, and then move on. I also found that the concept of "fair" was something my kids latched onto when they were little, and many times they were latching onto it in situations where "fair" really wasn't the issue at all, but it's an easy concept for a child to grasp. So another thing that I found helpful was to also try to frame the situation for my kids (they aren't on the ASD spectrum, so our approach may not be appropriate or might not work in this case)... but fwiw, it helped us when my kids were getting stuck on things being "not fair" for us to talk about the concept of "fair" and where it applies and then put a frame around the situation they are upset about and talk about whether or not it really i ssomething you can view as "fair" vs "not fair" or maybe more so just "something that happened" and needs to be dealt with. I am probably not explaining it well at all! But it did help my older dd, who used to be a bit rigid in looking at things like this.

Best wishes,

polarbear

DeeDee, I should had worded it better. I meant if there were issues where he would be really upset leaving the school, I would not want them to put him on the bus like that.

I change out things / situations on him all the time and he is used to it and most times is fine. When he's not than I can usually talk him through whatever issue quite easily.

I am thinking the teacher just had one of those days when short on patience yesterday. Anyone can have these but I still believe a phone call (at the least) would had been appropriate. If the bus driver and the bus company found it bad enough, I don't believe it was as innocent as the teacher made it sound in her email back to me. The teacher's email mentioning DS4.5 coming to school in a bad mood, complaining about easy work, not being happy, then throwing a tantrum ... yet his daily report saying he came to school "happy"??? And his OT told me he was in a great mood when she saw him yesterday morning ... so it all just doesn't make sense. But he's a very happy little guy today so that's what counts .

I did have a chance to see where the Kindergarten classes will be in the fall and looks like they'll be right across from the office and from the nurse. Since K is only half day, at least for this first year I don't have to worry about food contamination during lunch in the lunch room and the nurse will be as close as it gets should there be other issues. One thing I can cross off my list!

Now I have to gently ask to see if they can offer any differentiation at all to keep him out of trouble!

I asked 3 different people at school today if there is a gifted coordinator in our district and all said no. Since there is no state funding and our school district is needing to save money so bad they are looking into closing one of our 4 elementary schools, there is no such person and the gifted programs is pretty much a joke (basic pull out starting in 3rd grade). So I'm guessing any differentiation will need to be worked out just between me and his K teacher if he/she will be at all opened to it.

Mk, I don't want to be discouraging, but it's really hard to get differentiation in half-day K. The teachers are trying really hard to bring everyone up to a baseline of competence before first grade, and teach being-in-school behaviors like listening, waiting your turn, and walking nicely in line. The being in school behaviors will be extremely useful for your DS, and totally worth doing IMO, but it is extremely rare for a kindergarten teacher to be able to differentiate instruction in academics.

We found it useful to think about those early grades as DS's alternative curriculum; everyone else was learning to read and write and do math, which he already had in spades. What he did not have was self-management, grasp of school routines, play skills, friendship skills, sitting still and attending at circle time, coping with the unexpected schedule changes, and self-calming strategies. We invested those early elementary years in his learning those behaviors, and we are glad we did. That made it much easier for the school to then see the need for academic acceleration in later elementary, and he had developed the skills to function in the school setting that made the acceleration possible.

It would be lovely if one could have it all tailored in K for the gifted/autistic-- our experience was that even if you can't, it can still be okay and worthwhile. It's not all about academics in the early grades; it's about whole child development.

DeeDee

I was just looking more into the future to see what comes in the years after K though I'd love to see him at least being somewhat challenged in K too since I'm worried he'll look for trouble ... But apparently big NOTHING is waiting for us ahead. This sort of goes along with what the special ed director told me when I asked at what point in the future could we get both sons tested (she does know they are ahead in many areas). Her answer was something like "Oh, we won't even need to get them tested. We'll just see how they will do at school." ... now it makes sense there knowing there's nobody overseeing the gifted program. I'm pretty sure the gifted program is just based on the teacher recommendation.

So all this info is mainly important to me especially since we are considering homeschooling at some point. In a way I'm glad K is just a half day. He can do academics at home and learn the structure and social interaction at school. Hopefully it won't be too bad.

Just a quick update. Our IEP meeting is tomorrow and yesterday I emailed the special ed director regarding the allergy and other accommodations we would like to get covered in the IEP and her response was that the allergies would not be covered in the IEP and that he would have an Emergency Health plan (the same thing he has now).

The emails said
"The allergies would not be addressed in his IEP, but through his emergency medical plan. Accommodations could be placed in his IEP if the allergies were to interfere with his learning and access to his environment..."

Being the parent, I see his allergies affecting his learning and environment on a daily basis. How is it not enough to have something in writing that would help us prevent incidents from happening??? The emergency medical plan is for TREATING allergic reactions not really for preventing them.

She said if I need more clarification we can touch up on it again tomorrow at the meeting. So I emailed back saying we need more than just a health plan to keep him safe ... IEP or 504 if we cannot get it in the IEP but I tried to explain why I believe his allergies ARE interfering. Seriously, how cold they NOT???

... I'm so frustrated with the school district and he hasn't even really started school yet!

another quick update. I was just over at the school where DS4.5 should be attending next year and asked the office administrator and nurse about what he'd really need (they were sitting in the front office so was perfect timing!) and the administrator (or whatever her full function / name is) said that because he has an IEP he cannot have 504 (which I sort of figured out on my own) and that his health plan would be included in his IEP ... that there is a spot in the IEP where it would be put in. Is this how yours (who have IEP with allergies included) was done or was it actually written in the IEP among the accommodations that are needed? I feel like they are just trying to blow me off (whether unintentionally or not I'm not sure). I don't want just a treatment plan included ... I want actually specific accommodations to prevent the risks. Or am I misunderstanding this whole thing?

My understanding is that should ALL be rolled into the IEP.

Agreed. There should not be a case in which a child with an active IEP has got separate 504 plans or IHP/IHCP's, since all of those things are part and parcel of the child's care/educational environment.

If the IEP is faded, then those things that remain are rolled into a 504 plan.

An IHCP isn't about access. It's about safety and a treatment plan. Not management and certainly not about planning inclusive education.

Mk13, my ds who had an IEP did not have an IHP (what our schools call the health plan) and my dd who has the life-threatening food allergies did not have an IEP or a 504, she just had an IHP. There was a place in my ds' IEP form that an IHP would be inserted into if there was one. If that's what will happen with yours, I think that is a-ok.

I was concerned about having the IHP instead of the 504 for my dd, and had some other concerns as well re what we could and couldn't request that the school do to keep her safe. Our school was contentious, so I called FAAN (Food Allergy and Anaphylaxis Network) (I haven't checked in on them in a long time, and I can't remember if they are still FAAN or have they morphed into a different group?)... anyway I talked to the FAAN lawyer (who will answer questions for parents) and his advice was that using an IHP in place of a 504 is a *very* common practice in the US for students with food allergies and that it was generally not an issue. The 504 is intended to be used when the necessary accommodations to allow FAPE aren't provided routinely by the school... but when a school is using an IHP process as the route to provide accommodations for kids with food allergies, that's considered to be legally acceptable under the ADAA (I might not be stating this technically-legally-correctly, so please don't take my word for *anything*) - but - it might be useful to call FAAN yourself or send an email and ask what would by typical and appropriate in your situation.

Best wishes,

polarbear

ps - we did have specific accommodations as well as treatment instructions etc written into our dd's IHP.