Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Wear the T-shirt or Not?

Definitely not a major issue, but something I've been thinking about.

DS 4 just completed his first week of camp through the Center for Talent Development (Northwestern University). Like all camps, he got the requisite camp t-shirt.

Do we wear it in "public" or not? (I wouldn't think twice about having him wear his zoo camp shirt all day, but it seems a bit pretentious to have him walk around in a shirt that basically advertises his giftedness!)

Looking forward to others' thoughts!

Kathie

Here's one vote for "pretentious." I would never have my DD hide who she is, and if I'm asked I'll answer honestly, but I'm very uncomfortable with advertising.

I don't know if I would say its pretentious but it does kind of open you up to comments. DS6 goes to a gifted school, he wears his t shirt on the spirit days and anyone who saw it would know he goes to a gifted school. He doesn't wear it casually though. And I am not big on advertising either. But somehow, camp feels different, maybe because its a choice? If you don't mind getting comments or questions then let him wear it, but if you don't want to be judged, and people always judge, then keep it in the drawer.

DeHe

I say let him wear it if he wants but be prepared (and make sure he is too) to answer questions. If you aren't prepared for the questions then perhaps you could do something else with it to keep it more as a souvenir. If you are a little crafty, or know someone who is, you could do something like turn it into a pillow or quilt.

Hmm...

well, I guess that the healthiest thing from a parenting standpoint is probably to treat it no differently than any other tee-shirt with similar origins. That is, recognize that to your child, it isn't (at least, it shouldn't be) really any different from a school, organization, or club teeshirt.

Pragmaticaly, though, I would probably be fairly selective about where and when, much as I like my high-flown advice above. After all, I'd probably be a little reluctant to wear an atheist tee-shirt to a friend's baptism, even if it is a regular part of my wardrobe otherwise. KWIM?

DS8 has some t-shirts from his gifted school and various gifted programs. I am kind of selective about where he wears them. For example, I wouldn't encourage him to wear them at big family functions, because I don't think his cousins are in GT programs and that would be awkward. Regular day-to-day stuff, I wouldn't think twice about him wearing them. Of course, they don't say things like, "I am smarter than you" on them. They just list the school or the program and most of them have bright and colorful designs on them.

I'd guess that most people don't know that summer programs for 7th graders who score at certain levels on the SAT/ACT exist. Our schools certainly don't publicize them. So if your child shows up wearing a CTY t-shirt it may make little impression. I'm aware of CTY, of course, and have written about the SAT being largely an IQ test, so to me, a child wearing a CTY t-shirt DOES make a statement about smarts. (Younger students will have taken another test such as SCAT or Explore, but they are all g-loaded.) I don't have a problem with that.

People wear clothing and attach bumper stickers with university logos, which is similar to going around with a gifted program t-shirt. I suspect that if parents were somehow forbidden to ever mention where their children were going to college, applications to HYPS would fall by a decent fraction . Advertising that one attended a gifted program does not seem better or worse to me than advertising the attendance of a prestigious university.

Yep!

On the one hand, it's just a shirt like any other. Unless the shirt emphasizes giftedness in a tacky way, it is unlikely to be an issue. If you or DS were questioned about it, it should be simple to refer to CTD as a fun and interesting summer camp for DS. I would just let DS choose to wear it or not with perhaps your veto power when the setting is clearly inappropriate/uncomfortable.

Despite and perhaps contrary to my opinion above, I am extremely selective about where I would wear clothing with my college logo. Having graduated from an Ivy and having dealt with people's reactions over the year, I prefer not to have those conversations. I find it completely different from wearing my college logo as a student, particularly on campus.

Thanks everyone! I really appreciated your thoughts. As for the t-shirt, it just states the program names, but also spells out "Center for Talent Development." I never want DS to be ashamed of who he is, but I also don't want to him to think he is somehow better than others, just because of his gifts of intelligence.

To add to my dilemma, I wonder if I would feel differently if DS made the traveling team (of course that isn't possible yet) for a sport? I don't think I'd be as self-conscious.

At least for us, I think the decision will be to wear it on camp days only, but not change afterward unless I know it would specifically make someone uncomfortable.

I ordered a Mensa t-shirt years ago but I've never been able to bring myself to wear it. I guess that's my answer, lol.

I know... I wonder the same thing myself. What is with society in that sporty kids get celebrated but clever kids get ostracized? It makes no sense to me.

I think Center for Talent Development is sufficiently vague to most people, but if you came upon someone in the know then it might be slightly awkward. In theory I think he should be able to wear the shirt anywhere anytime because it's just a camp shirt, but in actuality I would be a little hesitant to have my ds wear it out and about.

What I generally do when my kids have a shirt that I don't want them wearing in public is I have them wear it as a sleep shirt, playing it up as "Wow, that will make a great sleep shirt! Very cool!"

Mensa for Kids has reading lists for children in various grades
http://mensaforkids.org/school_template.cfm?showPage=school_readeraward.cfm , discussed in a recent thread http://giftedissues.davidsongifted....2472/How_to_Choose_Summer_Reading_f.html , and a child who completes a list gets a free Mensa t-shirt . Our three kids are working on the lists and may visit the playground in matching Mensa t-shirts .

I feel that way about the Duke TIP car magnet. My car will have a magnet from 3 schools, the gymnastics place, the tennis place, the Kids chess thing...hmmmm I think that is all (yes, I know...but everyone does it where we live...when in Rome) but I just have the feeling that driving around with that Duke TIP magnet is obnoxious. DD11 feels the same way (without me telling her what I thought) even though in general, I am very careful to make sure she knows that she has a right to be proud of her academic accomplishments and that we are proud of her too, and that giftedness is not something to hide. The magnet is on the garage fridge. For some reason I think a t-shirt is less obnoxious than a magnet. I guess the bigger issue is the child's attitude and behavior--if a kid really wanted to wear the shirt I prob. would allow it.

Aw, neat! That's fun I opened the link and am looking at some of the book lists. Your kids will be the Mensa team at the park

I agree most people are not going to know what the Center for Talent Development means. And I don't know why those that do would be uncomfortable. I guess unless they specifically had a kid that wanted to go but wasn't accepted?

I know what CTD is. Most people I know don't though. I live in the Chicago metro and if I saw a kid with a shirt like that I would think it's cool and if I said anything I would probably ask if they enjoyed it because they sound like alot of fun!

DD17 adores her Davidson THINK t-shirt... but she only wears it to fencing club, where a lot of the other kids very bright.

I think everyone should be proud of their accomplishments. Some kids are gifted at sports and their parents put the magnet on the car and some are gifted intellectually.....and should put the magnet on their car. Be proud.

Kathie...DD just went to the same session and ended up with the same very colorful and way too big t-shirt...it was a little easier decision for us because dd took one look at the shirt and said she would never wear it (DD only wears dresses at this point lol)

...and if she really wanted to wear it, I would probably let her. If anyone asked about it, I would just say it was a summer program or camp that she got to go to. I graduated from U of C, Booth and wear the shirt all the time... I find that most folks, even in the Chicago area, are unaware of the school and reputation (and really do not care). I sort of figure that it would be the same with this shirt...

I wouldn't worry about it at all. Go to the park with him wearing the shirt, and you'll park next to a car with a "My child is on the honor roll at xxx school" bumpersticker, and on the other side will be a "My son goes to Harvard" and after that, a "My daughter is a US Marine". Guy walking by with a dog will have on a sweatshirt that says "Property of M.I.T."

I'd be inclined to let him wear it when he chooses to wear it (excepting, of course, state occasions like weddings and funerals). If that's where he went to summer camp, that's where he went to summer camp. And that's how I'd answer questions: "oh, it's his camp t-shirt". Wearing the shirt is not pretentious, nor is saying merely "it's a camp shirt." OTOH, having to use seven paragraphs to explain that he went to Special Super-Duper Snowflake Camp because he's just magically deliciously brilliant is unequivocally boorish (and we all know parents who'd do that).

ROTFL

Hmmm... my boys went years ago to CTD and I never thought twice about letting them wear the t-shirts. We never got a comment, a look or a question. I don't think that people look that closely or even know what it is, especially at that age. Maybe if my ds wore his CTD medal, lol, but a t-shirt? On a funny side note, ds12 came home from his chess camp (first time, and he loved it!) with a t-shirt. Dh, who is a bit of a geek himself, said, "don't let him wear that in public!" I just laughed, "hmmmm.. okay, should we have him wear his math team t-shirt or his gifted (middle school class) team t-shirt (the team name they picked out-emblazoned on the front- is 'nerd herd')?" Poor ds, lover of math and chess and science and programming, will not be able to escape his fate! Luckily, like dh, he's realized that being able to talk about sports is like currency he can spend in social situations.

Anyway, way off topic, but I guess I wanted to reassure you that even with the CTD tshirts, or the chess tshirts, or the math team tshirts, no one much seems to have noticed! And frankly, just the fact that you're aware of the potential implications means you are not the kind of "parent of gifted" who will drive everyone crazy!

I graduated from U of C, Booth and wear the shirt all the time... I find that most folks, even in the Chicago area, are unaware of the school and reputation

Well, I'm pretty impressed, lol, and think you should wear it proudly!:) (from the Chicago 'burbs)

I agree that no one seems to notice my kiddo's shirts either. He just finished chess camp and got a new t-shirt too. Really, I think that other people are probably similar to me -- I will notice the things I'm interested in. E.g., I was amused to see a coworker in a Joy Division t-shirt the other day, but I am unlikely to notice a country music t-shirt. I will notice a DYS t-shirt, but I will not pay attention to all the sports stuff.

I was actually at MSI yesterday and spotted a lot of CTD shirts, but I don't think most people even notice them if they're not aware of the program.

And honestly, most people aren't. Unless you have a child in a particular category, programs geared toward that category are pretty much off your radar. It would be like expecting most here to recognize t-shirts from the Grandfather Mountain Highland Games, or to figure out whether that orange tiger paw signifies Auburn or Clemson.

Oooh - I just came across the t-shirt that I wouldn't let DS wear if he got it at camp! Periodic table snarky shirt

st pauli girl...LOL

Agreed!

Ew. Let's just not tell my DS that shirt exists, OK?

DeeDee

Let's just not tell my DH that shirt exists.


It might be a real temptation on casual Fridays for a scientist who works in an engineering environment...

My daughter has been coveting this one:

http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/d4a0/