Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional PDD-NOS/anxiety and starting middle school

Hello all. I'm new here. I'm sorry if I get long-winded but I want to explain the situation and then ask my question.

My son is 10yo and just finishing 5th grade. He was recently diagnosed with PDD-NOS (Pervasive developmental disorder not otherwise specified) and is on the autism spectrum but is very high functioning. He also was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder. He will be moving to middle school next year in the same charter school he has attended since kindergarten.

My son is highly gifted in reading, math and science. According to the NWEA RIT charts, he's scoring in the 92nd percentile for 11th grade math. He will be placed in advaced classes and will participate in Math League and Knowledge Bowl. His penmanship and spelling, however, look like a 4 year old's. The school has been wonderful in working with us. He has a 504 that specifically addresses his handwriting and written processing problems.

My worry is about the anxiety. When my son gets anxious, he has to get up, pace and move his hands. He has had very caring teachers that have helped him the past few years to deal with this and give him the space he needs. He leaves the classroom when he can't keep it in check and this has worked for him. He also works once/week with a school social worker to help him cope.

Next year, my son will have 8 different teachers and will switch classrooms for different subjects. This is already causing him anxiety. Will all the teachers understand? Will they understand that although his writing is atrocious, he has other remarkable abilities? How do I help my son deal with his fear and anxiety about the year to come?

If anyone has been through this with their twice exceptional child and has advice, I would love to hear it.

TIA!
Rachelle

Does he have an IEP or a 504 in place? If not, I would get started on that. An IEP/504 will ensure that EVERY teacher he sees is aware of the accommodations he requires.

He does not qualify for an IEP but he does have a 504.

Here is the list of accommodations:
1. When possible, given a second and/or third opportunity to look at written work. Conferences and direction from teachers would benefit him greatly for any type of written response.
2. For larger projects, a check list with step by step directions on items needed to be completed with due dates.
3. Child will be provided with class notes.
4. Child will have space and person to go to for a break when he is feeling anxious.
5. Child will have preferential seating away from distracters and sit near role model type students.
6. Child will be allowed to take short breaks when needed out of the classroom or in the back of the classroom as long as he does not engage in distracting others.
9. Child will be allowed to type assignments if needed.
10. Teachers will be aware that Child is a literal thinker. Calm, precise and positive direction is important for Child.
11. Teachers will be aware that Child does best with structure. Pre-teaching for schedule changes is important

I'm really looking for ways to help him mentally prepare so that his anxiety doesn't make him implode. The month leading up to school starting and the first 2 weeks are always the worst. This year he may wear a hole in my carpet from pacing. He's already starting. Counseling hasn't helped much with this.

Would it be worth trying to get an IEP for direct services to address the handwriting and written expression problems?


The other awesome thing about an IEP is that you can spell out strategies for teachers to use in dealing with tricky behaviors, and it's binding. It might be worth pursuing.

I think you should schedule-- preferably before the end of this school year!-- a tour of the middle school, a meet-the-teachers moment for your DS, and a transition meeting with this year's and next year's teachers and relevant school staff to discuss your child's needs. This would help get everyone on the same page. You need them to understand him, and for him to be comfortable in the new environment. The best way to get there is to set it up to be as familiar as possible, on all sides.

DeeDee

I think this is a great idea. Thanks.

He does not qualify for an IEP. This year, with his current teacher, the 504 has worked. If the teachers next year follow it, it should be okay. If they don't, I will fight, but by then, my son's anxiety level will be through the roof. He's very much a perfectionist and his grades and the GPA at the top of his report card are the end-all for him. Being marked down for penmanship or not getting a second/third pass at written work would be devastating.

Just to be clear...it's not dh or I who put this much pressure on his grades. He had a unit in school about college and what kind of GPA he will need for a scholarship. With his anxiety, he worries about having enough money to live, much less go to college. It's difficult to get him to go easier on himself. We're working on it.

Hi Rachelle,

Have you had your 504 update meeting for next year yet, or is that done in the fall? If you can, I'd request a meeting now to address what you can add to the 504 to address the anxiety next year. You might also consider requesting an IEP under OHI for the PDD-NOS, with specific goals to help keep your ds organized and on track as he moves to the multiple classes in middle school.

Will the teachers all understand? Most likely not - that's just the nature of what we've encountered with our 2e kiddo. How large is the school your ds is at? Will he be with the same core group of students all day? Can you take him around ahead of time to meet teachers and see the classrooms? Do you think pairing him up with a buddy would help?

Our ds had a lot of anxiety going into middle school last year (he's not PDD-NOS, but he has LD and stress feeds into severe anxiety). One thing that helps our ds is when we can't eliminate all the anxiety a situation is going to produce, we can at least eliminate some and it helps. It sounds like handwriting is an issue for your ds (our ds has dysgraphia and dyspraxia) - is your ds using keyboard accommodations? If not, I'd consider working with him over the summer to move toward that and then perhaps if he feels like he's made some progress there it will be one less small little chunk of anxiety that he can avoid in the fall.

Our ds is very quiet and when teachers first meet him, all they know of him is that he's got dysgraphia etc (because we've told them ahead of time and it's in his file etc)... and that his handwriting looks like a 1st grader... and that the quality of what he writes is very elementary and simple. They don't see his brains and all his cool creative ideas - but I have to give most of his teachers a lot of credit in that once he's been in class and has had a chance to feel comfortable and contributes an idea here or there and the teachers get to know him better, most of them absolutely do realize how much smarter he is than he appears at first glance. I do feel though that having the accommodations set up to move him completely to keyboarding were *very* important in helping teachers see what he is capable of as well as important to have as he moved forward in school and his classmates' writing improved significantly. Our ds uses his laptop for *everything* in school, not just long writing assignments.

The other thing we did for our ds is specific to him but we switched him to a very small school. He could have stayed in the school he was in for middle school, but he wanted to change, so when we were looking at schools we purposely chose a small school both for that reason and also because we felt it would be easier for us to keep tabs and work with his teachers. I did a lot of work through the first half of the year going through his class assignments and locker etc at the end of the day with him just to keep him on track and make sure nothing got lost/forgotten/etc. which in turn helped keep his overall level of anxiety/stress down. If he'd continued at his public school he would have had oversight and help with this from the resource teacher. I don't know if that type of organizational skill is a challenge or worry for your ds but if they are, they are things that you can address in his 504.

That's all I can think of right now.... best wishes as you plan for next year!

polarbear

We won't have a 504 update meeting until fall. I will bring up an IEP again at that time, but as I've tried for the past 3 years, I won't hold my breath. I can also try to get a keyboard added to his accommodations, but I admit I'm hesitant. I think ds's writing has improved under his current accommodation and I'm hopeful it will continue to improve with teacher support, understanding and encouragement.

I would never consider our public school (huge and understaffed) for ds and we cannot afford private school. The charter school he attends is doing a fantastic job. They have quite a waiting list. Ds will mainly be with a core group, however, he will be pulled out for advanced English, math and science. This is a good thing as he will be with his friends, some of whom have diagnoses similar to ds.

Polarbear, your response was very helpful. Thank you.

Rachelle, I have to apologize a little bit - when I was replying the first time to your post I was also getting interrupted a lot, and I replied having only seen your original post and not the replies that were posted in between when I started typing and when I actually hit "submit"!

I was thinking about this a little bit more and wondering about something - is school still in session? Is there any chance you might know this spring before school is out who your ds' teachers will be next year? If you did do you think it might help at all to have a meeting either as a group this year or individually asap so that ds can talk to the teachers and the teachers might be able to help get ds excited about what he'll be learning or ease his anxiety a little bit by seeing that they care and will be looking out for him?

polarbear

Polarbear,
I have a request in for ds to get a certain teacher for his 'home-base' teacher. This teacher will be his 'home-base' teacher for the next 3 years. She'll be the one to remind them of normal schedule fluctuations, get them started for the day and such. Other than that, we won't know who his other teachers will be until July.

I sent an email to the school this morning and requested a special meeting in August with all of Ds's teachers. I figure as soon as they know who the teachers will be, they can set it up. I'd like them to meet ds and for him to see where each classroom will be before school starts.

Thanks again for your reply. It's nice to talk to people who are going through or have gone through the same things.

Because ds is exceptional at figuring math and science problems, it sometimes takes teachers a little while to see and understand the struggles he has.

MON, these are great suggestions. I'd certainly put the locker (and practice therewith) on the list of things to be addressed at the pre-start-of-school tour.

Rachelle, if you can get your DS in there before year's end, to observe how hectic the halls are, will it make him nervous all summer, or less nervous later because at least it's known?

DeeDee

I think it will make him more nervous. I think if we go before school starts and map out his routes it will help. I'll explain that there will be chaos around him but if he sticks to his route and timing, I think he can shut it out and be okay. We'll just have to talk about it.