Thank you so much for taking the time to give us all the details.
DS10, AS, is transitioning back into school for 5th grade, after homeschooling for a year, to work on a lot of these issues. His IEP will include a pullout for writing, help with organization issues and social skils and independent study for math. We have come a long way on the Goldilocks issue by working through new and challenging topics on a regular basis. The psychologist from the autism center has been doing a brief guided meditation with him, that he can use descretely anywhere, whenever he feels anxiety or frustration. He has actually now used it enough that he really feels it works for him.
I can't wait to share some of your ideas with his team, especially the one about the rubric for exactly what the teacher expects! THANK YOU!!