My main suggestion would be to get her to see the whole thing as a game - the teacher's assessment of her isn't actually some absolute truth, any more than hers is. The value is not in being able to get the numerical score "right", but in being able to see what's good and what's not so good about her work. So how about a game in which (maybe in writing so as to have a record to look back on, if convenient, or else just in her head), she asks herself:
- what aspects of this pieces of work are good - correct, or just as I wanted them, whatever's appropriate for whatever it is. (Thought process: if I were explaining to someone who was really struggling how to do this, what would I point them at in my work as a good example of how to do it?)
- what aspects am I not satisfied with, and why? (It's really important to be able to identify weaknesses without incurring a responsibility to go and fix them! If that's difficult, you might suggest that she picks one aspect of this piece of work to be a focus area for doing better in the next, or something. But also, some things are not worth getting perfect, it's OK to decide that, and it's something I wish I'd learned earlier!)
- given that, what mark do I think the teacher should give me?
- and what mark do I think the teacher will give me?
