Wow! That cadillac comment sounds strangely familiar... I wonder where educators get this stuff! Our circumstances are somewhat different, but we were told we were "not entitled to a Cadillac" when we requested accommodations for our daughter's life-threatening peanut allergy. My husband told me later that he wanted to say, "Well, all we're asking for is seat-belts in the Yugo!" Fortunately, he thought the better of it.
My guess is that if GT programs are not mandated by state law, you will not get very far legally (especially if money is tight!)
Have you done any reading about acceleration? It may be something that your district would consider in your son's case because it wouldn't cost them anything.
Why does your co-worker think your son is 2E? Do you think there is any basis for that? If he is, you may be able to get an IEP for him which could include accommodations for giftedness.
If you really feel that negative about your school district, your best option may be to move to an area with better schools.
Cathy
