I haven't been on here in quite a while and am so glad to have come back and read through some recent threads that gave me tremendous comfort if not always easy answers. I love this community!
That being said, I'm back to ask for specific advice from parents who know the struggle. DD8 has been accelerated in math since 1st grade and has just begun 3rd. They want to send her to 4th this year, but the school is about 15 minutes away. They want her to take the school bus that stops at our current/regular stop to the intermediate school, and then she will be transported by van back to the elementary school to rejoin her 3rd grade class for the remainder of the day.
My question is whether I should even bother trying to see how she does riding the "big kid" school bus. She has often struggled with riding the bus over the years, as it's basically the wild west of the school environment. Her official diagnosis has never gone beyond "Generalized Anxiety with Autistic Traits" but I find the only way I've had teachers and adults be able to understand her needs/struggles in the past is when I summarize it as "borderline Aspergers." She loves rules and no one follows them on the bus. I try to find balance in knowing when to push her and expose her to uncomfortable situations that will help her grow and stretch, and to know when to say there is no real benefit here and we are not going to fight this battle. That being said, is exposing her to the bus situation beneficial? Or should I just accept that my mornings will be a bit more hectic and drive her to the intermediate school, knowing that this will leave more reserves for navigating an a new situation and a big transition that may already be taxing for her?
The neuropsychs who have evaluated her in the past were always very sure that even going to another classroom would be too difficult for her anxiety and communication struggles. The school has always been adamant that is is necessary and we should continue to push to see how she does, and so far the school has always been right. She has always been happiest when she was with the older students in her math classes. So I am leaning towards listening to the school on this one and pushing her to ride the bus. Psychologist said he understands where I'm coming from in the debate, but thinks the bus is horrible and I shouldn't bother. So, there's that.
