This is my first time posting on this site and I'm really hoping I can get some guidance or advice.
I�m not exactly sure what to think about our DS. He is 6 years old and I�ve suspected that he might be �slightly� gifted since he was 3 years old. Mostly, his personality traits are typical of those of gifted kids, but he's not showing any/many signs of giftedness when it comes to his intellect. Bottom line, we are still questioning whether or not he is, and we have an appointment to get him privately tested in May.
The thing is, the "gifted personality traits" are exhausting us! And when I read about parents of GCs, it makes me want to cry because we have so many of the exact same problems. Here is a small sample:
- He is so emotionally intense. Like so many gifted kids, he worries about natural disasters. As soon as we mention that we�re going somewhere, he asks if there are tornadoes, hurricanes or volcanoes there. He worries about comets hitting our planet and about the sun going supernova. He was upset with me this morning because I called one of our cats a �brat�. He didn�t want me to hurt the cat�s feelings. He also gets very upset if something gets changed in his environment. We gave away our old treadmill because we couldn�t fix the belt on it and he was very upset when the new treadmill that came in wasn�t exactly the same � apparently, there was an image of a cat on the front panel (that I had never noticed!) and the new one doesn�t have one.
- He is an extreme perfectionist. If he can�t do something right away, he doesn�t want to do it. If he makes a mistake in his writing, he erases it until he shreds the paper. If I correct him because he has reversed a letter or number, he starts to cry and gets mad at me. If I try to help him read a word, he shakes his head as if to wipe out what he just heard (because he wants to be able to do it alone).
- He can�t stand doing homework and it�s torture for all of us every time we have to sit down to do it. I can�t imagine what it�s going to be like when he has more than 10 minutes of homework every day!
On the flip side, there are some really wonderful/amazing aspects to his personality. He loves all things science � astronomy, how the earth was formed, human biology, evolution, animal behaviour (echolocation, predation), electricity, and so forth, and it's so much fun to embark on the many different learning journeys with him. He asks tons of questions, is always curious, wants to learn about everything, except that he doesn�t enjoy learning to read or write.
As for "giftedness" per se, he doesn�t seem much above average in his intellect. I know that gifted kids do not always perform exceptionally well at school (or they can even perform poorly). But in his case, it isn�t because he is trying to underperform or because it�s too boring or anything. And I know that it�s possible that he could have a learning disability. But it�s not just that he isn�t learning to read very quickly, he actually doesn�t seem to learn anything exceptionally fast. For instance, we were reading a book yesterday that describes the senses and he was completely absorbed, but this morning he couldn�t identify the pupil, iris or cornea. By the way, he is the one who begs for these types of books.
The only possible indications might be his rather exceptional vocabulary (words like soaring, gather, investigating, quench, chorus, scurry, etc. starting at ages 3-4), his love for playing with words (he has had a �rhyming collection� since he was 3, and loves word games), the fact that he is observant (he was 21m and said his fruit looked like the moon, etc.), and that he corrects the smallest mistakes anyone else makes. But maybe those small things are just oddities?
I really don�t care that much about getting him tested or identified or anything. And we love his intensity in many ways, but we want to be able to be able to help him control his emotions a bit better. We�ll be really happy if he is successful in school, but we mostly want him to be happy and well adjusted. AND, we would love to keep our sanity. He can be so exhausting...
Any ideas as to how to manage? I know this is an awfully open-ended request, but I just feel sort of drained.
