I understand your position and was in a similar situation last year with handwriting. My DS6 really dislikes to write. He's a very reluctant writer because it doesn't match up very well to his verbal abilities. He's very frustrated by it. His mind works faster than he can write, so he loses his train of thought while trying to make his fingers work. He's fine motorskills challenged in other activities too, but I don't believe he is so far behind that it is a problem. It is definitely hard to compare if you aren't around kids in an educational setting.
Last summer, between K and 1st, I decided not to push it and he took the summer off. During his first grade year, his handwriting was ok, but certainly was in the bottom of the class in comparison. Sometimes I think it actually has gotten messier than when he was in kindergarten. It is something he needs to practice more, so I vowed not to let it slide like last year.
This summer, we are doing a journal. It is a major pain to get him to sit down and do the journal more often than not. He will complain longer than he actually spends doing it, but he will tell me he liked doing it once he finished it.
We ask him for a page or two and a drawing. I don't correct anything, but I will verbally tell him how to spell something correctly. It isn't everyday, but a few times a week. It has really helped when I sat next to him and wrote in my own journal. His little sister also sits down and draws pictures in her journal too. This is makes it more like family time than an assignment.
Other ideas we have done to encourage writing is to draw pictures. It isn't letter formation, but still excellent practice. Then, after a picture is done, ask him to give it a title or have him draw characters he can name. Comic book style storytelling combines pictures and simple writing. Maybe he loves a superhero or sports or a game like Minecraft? Use it!
My son really hated writing letters over and over again, so him giving me words to spell for him worked better for getting him engaged. He felt like he was getting somewhere if he wrote a sentence or two. Alliteration is a fantastic way to write silly sentences and work on a particular letter. Also, we used thick barreled mechanical pencils with cushy grips because thin pencils were harder for him to use. Reward the effort by keeping score - stickers, coins, etc. Let him "save up" for something bigger. For some a timer might work, for us it did not and even defining quantity is a challenge as he'll write 2 words on a line and skip lines.
I think the biggest challenge was my own patience. Practice is everything. It won't be perfect. It takes time to get there. My own frustration with my son not writing the letters right was impacting how he thought about himself. Once I backed off the criticism of his work, then he felt better about doing it.
Are you a perfectionist? I am and it took me a while to realize that my own perfectionist tendencies weren't helping the situation. My son is also a perfectionist and it sounds like yours is too. It's a tough combination, but you can work through it!
