Well, if he were mine, I'd be worried about the year-of-video-games possibility, but that's an issue you could possibly work around by creatively scheduling companion/tutors. We have found college students excellent as hired mentors.
What is happening right now to make school work? Are there accommodations for the various disabilities in place? When school isn't working, I always start by looking for what could be tweaked to make it work. Are they letting him type all his work? Is someone doing Orton-Gillingham or another program for the dyslexia? School is responsible for providing some therapies-- though I know that timing (time out of class) quickly becomes an issue.
I would not want the gap year to be only rewarding-- as you note, you could probably plan for it to be a mix of rewarding work on topics of interest and targeted remediation/therapies, specifically teaching workaround skills that make it possible to "do school" with the disabilities. You'd have to be careful to set it up to be rewarding enough, though, so he wouldn't feel "broken" (any more than he already does).
I would also talk to any professional helpers you already have about what you're seeing. Your prescribing doc needs to know that the studying is or feels impossible right now, even with the medication-- as well as monitoring the frustration level closely. If DS has a therapist, I'd talk with that person about pros and cons before broaching it with him. If there are any teachers who really "get" him, likewise. Gathering perspectives feels to me like building a safety net.
Hang in there-- now that you know what you're dealing with, hopefully the steps to make things better will fall into place.
ETA: At this point I would not really do much about the lying, as I'd see it as a by-product of the frustration. He needs to know you are on his team and trying to help improve things. That will produce more honesty over time.
Last edited by DeeDee; 04/27/14 06:23 PM.
