My ds12 is in 6th grade. He's very small, about the same size as the 3rd grader next door. We aren't sure what's causing the growth delay yet, but he doctor thinks he's just a late bloomer. The bigger problem is that he has ADHD, and he has trouble socially. He's impulsive and just says anything that comes into his head. When kids tease him about his height, he can get emotional and cry, or angry and beligerent, depending on the day. He's highly gifted and is subject accelerated in math and science. He has kids to eat lunch with and sit on the bus with, but sometimes they're mean too. Because of his size, he thinks he has to prove he's just as (atheletic, smart, important) as other kids.
Right now, he goes to public school. There are about 500 kids in his grade (there were 400 in his elementary school). The school is so big, they just process the kids. Ds has been physically attacked in the hall (attacker has been removed from the school), pushed around, and teased. I think middle school kids must try to make themselves more important by pushing other kids down.
Option 1 is to leave him in the same school (public) for next year. The kids (and ds) might mature, and the academics are as good as it gets around here.
Option 2 is a small private school that specializes in kids with ADHD and other learning issues. They absolutely don't tolerate bullying, the kids are closely supervised, and he'd have individual help with organization, emotions, etc. The class sizes are less than 10 kids, with maybe 15 kids per grade. The academics are not as good, but they are willing to continue with the math acceleration. The science acceleration is up in the air. I'm thinking he could go there for the rest of middle school and then go back to public school. It's expensive, and they don't provide transportation.
I guess there might be an option 3: one of several private schools around. They have varying academics, cost various amounts of money, are much smaller than the public school, and will not help him with specific social issues. They all say they will work with an ADHD student. I don't know parents who send their kids to any of them, so I don't know.
Ds is open to talking about a different school, but not enthusiastic about going to one.
What would you do?
