Golfer, we haven't been in the same situation, but our ds was in a situation that had some similarities. He was in a lottery school rather than neighborhood for K-5th grade; we picked the school feeling it offered him the best chance of grade level differentiation/subject acceleration combined with interesting core project work. It didn't work out that way in practice, but we kept hanging in there partly because I loved what the school was *supposed* to be. I was very involved in volunteering at the school and served on the school's advisory board. I made a point of getting to know the teachers and helping out any way I could. Our ds had entered K just full of excitement over learning anything and everything, but that changed once he was in school. For the longest time we focused on a disability which became clear once he had been in a few years of school - and we tended to not notice that he wasn't being challenged in his areas of strength. Then in 5th grade my usually very quiet son just had had it, and he finally told us how beyond incredibly bored he was and that he wanted more than anything to change schools. We didn't choose to homeschool, but we moved him to a small private school. Like your ds, my biggest worry (and my ds' biggest worry) was the loss of friendships. My ds did not have a large # of friends, but he had two close friends he'd known since kindergarten. I planned to do my best to keep them in touch after the school change.
Well, fwiw... ds absolutely needed the change, and he's been sooooo much happier in his new school (it's much more academically challenging, and he was given subject acceleration that was promised but never happened at his previous school). He has made two good friends at his new school... and we haven't seen his old friends since last summer. Somehow their importance in his life just vanished when he found his new happy place at his new school, and having new friends who are closer to his intellectual peers as well as who share intellectual interests has been such a good thing for him. I had spent so much time *inside* the world of his previous school that I hadn't realized there might be a *better* place outside of that world, and that better might include a different set of friends.
Anyway, I'm sorry I have no advice about the switch to homeschooling specifically, but I thought it might ease some of your concerns re losing friendships to know that making this change is an opportunity to make new friends. And I suspect you'll be able to hold onto the old friends too if you make the effort to - for our ds, it wasn't worth the effort once he'd found his new groove.
Best wishes,
polarbear
