Perhaps the extreme responses of some kids may be a consequence of ADHD, Aspergers, or other problems, but the concern for these issues itself seems to part of the gifted constellation, from what I've read.
My DS age 7 has learned to better control his responses despite his ADHD. One avenue we have used is chess. In chess, there are clearly outlined rules, and there are actions and consequences. The Susan Polgar "win with grace, lose with dignity" adage also applies.
Before our interventions (therapy and meds), DS would react in an extreme manner to what DS perceived as not following the rules. Now, with lots of effort and practice, his reactions are more calm and measured. Some of this is likely maturity, but I think lots of it is due to the steps we have taken together.
