I agree with ultramarina. My DS3 goes to a private in-home daycare three days a week. There are five other kids there and his caregiver dotes on him and makes sure she has level-appropriate toys and books for him (but really, he mostly wants to play with the trains, LOL and she provides him with plenty of those). He is free to be himself and explore whatever he wants and just play, play, play. There is no comparing to other kids or holding him back. He LOVES going.
He just started preschool a few weeks ago, going two mornings a week. It is a play-based school. They do not have a strict education mandate, rather they focus on social skills like manners, taking turns, being respectful, etc. Oh, and play, play, play! A good portion of the day is spent in free play. There is one structured activity, designated reading time, and snack time, but otherwise they play. My DD9 went to the preschool, too, and it is a fantastic fit for my kids because their differences are not glaringly obvious. If they have educational interests, we work on them at home. DS loves preschool so much that he wants to go everyday and does not want to leave when we pick him up.
Good luck with your decisions.
