Even though I homeschool my son I would absolutely not have homeschooled my very social daughter even if she could have learned more academically by homeschooling. The thing is, she could learn quickly whenever she wanted and needed to learn something and that didn't change even though straight A's were no longer important to her in middle school and high school. I remember getting phone calls from the teachers saying she was such a smart girl but she didn't turn in her work or she was talking too much in class or something like that. Middle school was the absolute worst. I hated those phone calls from her teachers. I didn't know what to say to them or my daughter so that she would listen. I couldn't understand how she went from making straight A's and teachers saying only good things about her to so many complaints. My daughter was just so different from me.
I tried talking to my then middle school aged daughter. I told her how important those grades were and how she needed the good grades and good test scores to get college scholarships so she could get a good federal government job like most of the people in my family have and she would have health insurance and she could afford a nice house, etc. after she worked her way up. She just wasn't interested. I couldn't understand it. I listened to my parents. Why didn't she listen to me?
But I always wanted my daughter to have the opportunity to make lots of friends and she did in school. She still goes on vacations with these friends who are now living in different states, but it doesn't matter because they enjoy traveling to see each other. About 10 of them got together recently to go to Las Vegas. They have been on cruises together. I love it that she is working hard and making good money and also enjoying life. This is what I wanted for both of my kids, but my son has disabilities as well as gifts that would make public school more difficult so we have to homeschool.
I am happy that my daughter has all those friends from school because as an adult she found really good jobs through her network of friends. She is smart but never took an IQ test, taught herself to read at 4, was young for her grade with a summer birthday and enjoyed combination classes like 3rd and 4th taught together where she was one of the younger students. But she seemed more socially gifted than anything else when she became a cheerleader in middle school. She told me she lost interest in school because the way they taught did not fit her learning style.
I think she learned most of what she knows after she got out of school. She does not get upset when things go wrong and is a good problem solver and she is very good at dealing with people. She does not get intimidated when she speaks to wealthy business owners. Her intuition and people skills are an asset. Her supervisors noticed this about her and even though she didn't have a degree, the company she works for recently wanted to make her an operations manager. Now that she has a job that pays well, she wants to take more college classes and finish her degree. I always thought you had to get the college degree first, then the good job. I am glad she didn't always listen to me and figured out for herself there is more than one way to do things. I hate to say this as a homeschooler, but I think my daughter was better off going to school.
Even though my daughter lost some of her "sweetness" in middle school by dealing with difficult middle school drama, it made her tougher. And having older friends caused some trouble later in high school, but we got through it. I can see in retrospect that all of these life experiences were a good thing for her.
