Hi, I'm 20 years old. Someone recently told me that I write like a middle schooler, but I find that as an insult. It could be true. Oh well.

I was never in a gifted and talented program in elementary to high school, and I'm still overly bitter about it. What are the chances that a person who was salutatorian of his high school class was never in a gifted and talented program while there were many others with ranks in the 50s-100s who were? I've been obsessively thinking about this for many years, and I don't know what to do with my life anymore. I've been getting bad grades in college for the first two quarters and I withdrew in the third quarter my freshman year. I want to become a Putnam Fellow, but I don't have even 1% skill of an experienced IMO participant.

Hi, not sure why you haven't see more response on this - I mean I don't think anyone here can say definitively yes or no to your question 'am I gifted'? however the scenario you describe - the salutatorian of your class, while others with lower academic achievement were selected for /tested for gifted programs could go either way.

At most schools, high grades can be achieved by following rules, studying very hard and having decent natural ability, in the 'above average' or 'bright' range - it doesn't rule giftedness in or out. But the fact that you are interested in the question of your own ability/giftedness is kind of telling, sounds like there is more there, more than just good grades on your part, for you to be 'obsessing' on this, in your words.
I think you might do well to acquaint yourself with some of the giftedness markers in many of the articles on this site and others - if you go through some of the lists of characteristics and really see yourself there, it is probably reasonable to consider yourself gifted. However, giftedness doesn't mean you'll always be successful in all pursuits, a few people are like that, but most are great at a few things and not so great at others.

If you want to 'reset' from where you are...since it kind of sounds like you feel like you've gotten off track, consider therapy or life coaching - pursuing a conversation about why college - this college at this time, might have been a mis-fit for you may help you take another shot at whatever you think will lead you in a good direction through your 20s and beyond. But for sure, at 20, MOST people, gifted or otherwise, are winging it, to say the least, so please don't fret too much on it.
I am a pretty successful IT person now, but at 20? well....let's just say I had a ways to go. some links that might be a good place to start, if you have not already -

https://www.davidsongifted.org/search-database/topic/105260/entrytype/1

Gifted Adults - Hoagies

Hi, I agree with Chris that it isn’t really possible to definitively answer your main question just from the details of your post but I’d like to add a few comments about some of the things you wrote.

I think it’s important to value the substance rather than the idea of achievement. You’ve managed to acquire knowledge, skills and wisdom to become class salutatorian, which you can now use towards your new goals, instead of wasting your time on regrets about missing out on a past program. You can take pride in what you’ve achieved by yourself. My DH missed out on similar opportunities in his youth but is far more successful today than many who received such benefits, in many ways because of (rather than in spite of) the disadvantages he faced which increased his self reliance & determination. Our kids have even declined such opportunities because they realise from their father’s experience that it is possible to succeed through their own dedication, hard work, organisation & discipline.

It’s certainly a very worthwhile aspiration to be a Putnam fellow but given the level of this challenge and the calibre of contenders, it would no doubt require a strong math foundation and some serious study preparation. I imagine it’s a prize that one would only aim for if one were already a serious maths scholar, rather than a title that one would specifically seek, just for the sake of it.

I know it probably sounds cliche’d, but I encourage you to think about what you really want to do with your life and strive with discipline to make that happen. In my experience, the self satisfaction from productive work which is worthwhile & enjoyable, far outweigh any external validation or acknowledgement.

I wholeheartedly agree.

Yes!


There are also resources which may be of interest listed in the Gifted Adult section of this forum.
Link - http://giftedissues.davidsongifted.org/BB/ubbthreads.php/forums/29/1/Adult.html
To access older posts, at the bottom of that page, under Display Options - Show Topics - select "from all dates" and click Change.