Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Making 6 year old to stop chewing toys and stuff

My 6 year son old cannot stop chewing stuff. It is a lifelong habit. We have talked to him incessantly about it and so have his teachers. The habit is not new or is it related to teething. He just chews and hums non-stop when he is working or playing. The humming, I can tolerate, but the chewing has got to stop. He chews pencils, shirtsleeves, sun glasses, carseat straps and pretty much anything else. He does this while working and playing - two of the times during which he is highly focused. I understand that some habits make kids focus better but this is unhygienic and is always upsetting the germophobe in me. Any ways to redirect this behavior? Talking about it and even videotaping it so that he can watch himself do it and be aware of it does not seem to help. I have noticed that he chews most when he is working on math and his martial arts class.
How can an otherwise smart and reasonable kid not be able to understand that this is a bad and undesirable habit?

Can you find him something more appropriate to chew on, instead of making him give up the habit entirely?

Have you tried gum? DS9 was a chewer to a lesser extant and we found that gum helped. We use a xylitol gum so that I don't worry about his teeth. You might also want to consider a sensory "chew" toy or necklace designed for kids who need to chew. Given the amount of chewing you are seeing and the times you are seeing it, I'd consider that this could be a sensory need versus a bad habit. In that case, you are much better off redirecting it into a more socially-acceptable behavior than trying to shut it down. Logic won't help in those cases- even with smart kids.

This does sound like a sensory need. We bought this chewy at Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B006YBJ9XS/ref=wms_ohs_product?ie=UTF8&psc=1

It smells and tastes like chocolate. He also liked the lemon and orange ones from the same manufacturer. They have two differently textured sides.

There is a whole industry for this type of need and I was surprised to find they had chewy pencil toppers, vibrating chewies, special chewy jewelry (necklaces, bracelets)and more.

My son found tremendous stress relief in chewing these items. It rather shocked me how he responded when I gave him one. He wore his around his neck tucked in his shirt or attached to a retractable badge holder clipped on his pants pocket. They did help him focus and relieve stress that needed a physical outlet.

Hope you can find an appropriate outlet for your son. I believe understanding that it is a need helps in finding the solution.

It sounds like a sensory thing, as pps have noted. I would really encourage you to think about the issue in a different light. It probably isn't that he doesn't understand that it is not a good habit. I am sure that he does. It is that he is 6 years old and experiencing and incredibly intense NEED for this sensation. Imagine if you had an incredible itch that wouldn't go away. Everyone told you it that itching it was bad and you shouldn't do it, but it was the only way to get some relief. And you're 6 years old. That it what he is likely experiencing. Criticizing him for the chewing is probably not going to make it go away. It may, however, make him feel really rotten for needing to to it.

I would suggest a compromise: it is ok for him to chew on some agreed upon chewable items that you will provide. It is not acceptable for him to chew on other things. This gives him the sensory outlet that he needs without the destruction that is currently occurring.

Fwiw, I did not understand my son's sensory needs until he was a bit older than your son and I really regret it because he got the unintended message early on that these things were "bad" and that he was "bad" because he needed to do them. That message has been really hard to undo. I really encourage you to think about the problem in a different way and avoid, if possible, the negative feelings that your son might develop if his need isn't recognized. Best of luck!

One of our children was and to some extent is still a chewer. Everything and all the time, especially clothes and hair. We didn't draw too much attention to the habit as such but pointed out when the chewing made it hard to brush hair or meant the end of a favorite shirt. I did get a chewy necklace meant for mothers to wear with teething or nursing babies. After a few years the habit has subsided.

My DS6 is very similar in his need to chew and in the constant humming. When his overall sensory system is regulated, his need to chew is not as strong. I would definitely get an OT evaluation done to see is it is sensory related. In DS6's case, when he has a good proprioceptive base, (lot's of jumping, crashing on the crash pad, ball pit time, even swimming) his sensory needs decrease.

It took us a long time to realize that his chewing on his fingers was a real NEED and nothing we were going to say or do was going to change that need. My DS6 refuses to even try gum, but he does like Hi-Chews (you can get a big bag at Costco). Chewy foods are also helpful and he loves Asiago bagels. Beef Jerky might be another thing to try. We have had to change our approach from "trying to get him to stop" to trying to give him enough sensory input in the right ways to decrease his need to chew. It's not easy and he still has bad days, but it is improving.

DS6 also hums ALL DAY. He does is to block out other sounds. Is your son bothered by sudden noise or background noise? DS is very sensitive to all sounds - even a fly in the house (in another room) or the birds chirping outside can set him off. Humming is his way of coping. He has been evaluated for CAPD and they suggested giving him periods of complete quiet time throughout the day to let his system rest. He also wears sound blocking earphones during sensitive times. Not sure if any of this will help your DS, but they both the humming and chewing sound sensory related.
Good Luck!

My DS6 chewed a lot of things too, and he hummed (still hums occasionally and the chewing is nearly absent). It used to drive me crazy- not so much germs, but worrying about all of the chemicals or metals that seem to be in so many products.

When he was little, the humming was something that we noticed right before a tantrum. In fact, it was a late warning system that he was nearing a breakdown.

I think it may be sensory (he complains that he can't concentrate with background noise- neither can I for that matter). The chewing tended to happen if he was overstimulated or frustrated- although he chewed his pencils when he was concentrating (I still do that:)

I made a big deal out of it, and I think it actually made the problem worse. He responded to my anxiety and he also discovered it was great way to push my buttons

The chewy things didn't work because it actually seemed to encourage more chewing, but parents whose children have severe chewing issues swear by them. Gum would be a trap for us because my DS likes to "game" the system and would chew just to get a piece of gum!

We do give crunchy food (whole apples are great, love the idea of beef jerky, we have even suggested that he chew some ice), and I don't know how well your son reads, but once mine reached the point where he could read for enjoyment, 10 minutes with a book calms him down. I've even explained to him that in addition to all of the great things about books, they focus the mind and calm the emotions.

Ashley, does your ds have any other signs of sensory needs or any type of anxiety? Or have you tried asking him if he is distracted by anything when he is working at focusing while doing homework etc? It's possible the chewing is simply a need to chew, but sometimes sensory-type habits are prompted by something else, and if you can find that something else you can figure out either a way around or a way to get past the habit such as chewing.

My dd11 is a sensory-seeking child, and she used to chew when she was around the age of your ds. One of the things that was suggested to us to use for school/homework were pencil "erasers" that were intended to be chewed on - they look like fun kid-erasers, the type you stick on the end of a pencil, but they aren't really erasers, they are chew-things (sorry I have no idea what the technical term is or brand name!). We were able to order them through one of the companies that sells sensory-integration therapy equipment etc - I can't remember which company specifically, but I think there was a company named "Southpaw" that we ordered her a seat cushion through, and they might have something similar.

What really helped my dd rather than replacing what she chewed on etc, was finding ways to reduce her need for the sensory input. One thing that helped her a ton was brushing - this isn't something you're supposed to do without being shown how to do it first by a sensory OT, but it's essentially brushing gently on the arms and legs, and then gently pulling in and out on the joints of the arms and legs. Again - this is something that you shouldn't ever just try to do on your own, you need to see how it's done first, demonstrated by a professional who knows what they are doing But, fwiw, it felt good and it really helped calm our dd's needs for the other types of sensory input. DD also had trouble focusing when there was noise in the background (either at home or in the classroom) and so she went through a listening program which helped out there - and once she was able to more easily tune out background noise, we saw a big reduction in her sensory-seeking behaviors.

I suspect what's going on with your ds isn't anywhere near as complicated as my dd's sensory needs, but fwiw, if the chewing is just really bugging you or if it's causing social issues for your ds, I think that even just one appointment with a sensory integration OT could give you some valuable advice about how to deal with it for your ds specifically.

Best wishes,

polarbear

ps - another thought - if it's mostly a habit and not a sensory need - your ds is at an age where you *might* see worries about what peers think kick in. I loved loved loved to suck my thumb when I was young and wasn't going to give it up no matter what - until I was in first grade and started being aware that I was the only kid who was still sucking their thumb. Do you know if he chews while he's at school in the classroom?

Thanks for all the replies. I had not even considered that the need to chew and hum could be sensory needs.
He is sensitive to noise, but not as much as I am, so I never considered that to be an issue until now.
I am going to see the pediatrician next month and will ask for referrals and resources to get an evaluation to understand what is going on with DS.
I will try out the products listed on this thread meantime to see how they help. Thanks again!