Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Comments from other kids in class to ds

Hope that title didn't sound worse than it is...
My ds8 is in 3rd grade in a pretty good ps system, with a nice pullout gt program that he participates in.
There are at least 4 other kids in the program just in his class; I think they might have grouped them in a little cluster or two in each grade for solidarity - if it was an accident it certainly has been a happy one!

On the other hand, some of the kids in the class have told ds that they, too, ought to be in the class, or said that he should not be. There have been some other comments apparently but I am not getting a ton of details. The couple of boys that ds has mentioned are, by chance, pretty big guys. DS is not small for his size, but he is a July birthday so younger.
So far it just sounds like rudeness but I don't want it to get worse.

I asked to find out if he brought the subject up or if the kids just noticed that a small group exit the classroom from time to time...they just noticed from what I could gather.

I am wondering who else has run into this and what if anything I can tell ds. For now I have just told him to downplay it. If it comes up I said to be very careful to not sound like you are bragging. And, if someone thinks they should be in the gt program, to tell them they should speak with their parents about applying for it.

Ideas?
thanks

Well done Chris. I like your ideas. Especially this one.
Grinity

Thanks, that makes me feel less completely clue-less!
At least it's not just him all by himself with 25 other kids wondering what's up.

I think giving your son a reply or two that he can use in a scripted way might help, if he's not sure how to respond or might make things worse. I like the response of "well then tell your parents you want to apply" if they say they should be in the class, too. If they are saying he doesn't belong there then maybe something along the lines of "I belong wherever Ms. Teacher tells me to go" might take the conflict out of the situation.

If it continues you might want to help him come up with a plan to discuss it with the teacher or ask him permission for you to talk to the teacher. I agree with not letting it go too far but you also want to give him a chance to work through it on his own.

FWIW, MrWiggly deals with kids telling him he's too young for 3rd grade, calling him a liar about his age and stuff like that. He's getting better at responding to it all the time. And we talk about it at home so he understands that the other kids are in the wrong and being rude. Of course there was last year when he turned 7 but he had finally just agreed with everyone that he was *already* 7, so he let them all think he was turning 8! He seemed to have the right "I don't really care what they think" attitude though. I think that's a good thing for a kid to be able to fall back on.