Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy How to turn down publicity

DS10 did well on a nation wide middle schooler math test. His math teacher and the principal started to make a fuss right now. They arranged a local newspaper reporter for interview and the next thing we knew, they were talking about DS going to international math olympiad competition. We thought that this was absurd to some extent for a 10-year-old. We appreciate all the helps from his math teacher and the principal. Cannot really blame them...how could they know middle school math competition if it were not DS. My question is how to turn down this silly publicity nicely. Anyone has experience?

You could tell them that you are trying to protect your son from being in the public eye (for a myriad of reasons - bullying being one). I understand that you appreciate the help you've gotten from the teacher, but ultimately your son is counting on you for protection.

I think just saying "We're honored that you asked, but we're not interested" is really all you need to say. If you'd like to give more of a reason, you could say something neutral like your son has too many other commitments to set aside the time that would be required, or that you think he's still too young for the type of competition and the work required.

Best wishes,

polarbear

Don't conflate the suggestion that your DS might do Olympiad stuff with the publicity stuff though - I'd suggest saying no thanks to the latter and yes PLEASE to the former. In a school context, Olympiad prep is probably the smoothest path to real challenge and, if successful, contact with other really strong mathematicians.

Let me make this clear:

FACT: DS did well in a math test. (There is no trophy or winner per se. DS was in top 1%, and there are more than 50 of them state wide).

DISTORTION: GT teacher and principal told the local newspaper reporter that DS goes to math olympiad next.

Statistically wise, link these two things together is like guessing one number right and winning the lottery.

There are rumors of of school budget problem and the first thing they might cut is the elementary schoool's gifted program. It is just my wild guess that the principal and GT teacher want to make a fuss about DS's story is just one effort to save the program and save their jobs.

No matter how good their intentions are, I have feeling that the absurdity is going up. For example, GT teacher told 5th graders that DS spent five hours on math every day.

Ah, I see; I hadn't understood that from your original post. (Which national math test was it, just out of interest? If it was the AMC8 and he was already in the top 1% at age 10, some excitement is justified; and since the later AMC contests do form part of the selection procedure for the USAJMO, USAMO and ultimately IMO, it might to some extent explain the slippery slope they fell down!)

Yes, it is AMC8. DS got 15 last year, and 22 this time. We are proud of him for his improvement. But that is not relevant to olympiad. There are AMC10, AMC12, AIME, USAJMO, USAMO. It is one in a million chance to accomplish that, even DS could see that clearly, how come some grown-up educators got confused about the simple fact.

Well done to him!

Hmm. The way I see it, you have multiple things to deal with here.

1. DS did well on AMC8. The question here is, what do you do next? Forget the Math Olympiad. Think about the NEXT STEP, and if you and your son want to move toward it.

2. The school called a reporter in. The question here is, are you comfortable with sending your kid off to be interviewed about his math talent? It sounds to me like the answer is "no." Fine. There have been good suggestions here for politely declining.

3. The school may be afraid of losing funding for its gifted program. So maybe they called a reporter in to get some good publicity as an attempt to save the program. But you don't know this. Maybe the principal just got carried away. Personally, I'd figure out a way to learn what the principal really wants. If it's a reasonable goal, maybe you can help him find a way to reach it that doesn't involve unwelcome publicity for your son. For example, you might say, "It's great that you think so highly of Little Johnny, but we're very uncomfortable with giving away personal information about him without our consent." [pause; see what he says; he might not have thought of it that way] "Were you trying to highlight the overall quality of the gifted program at the school? If so, maybe we can figure out a way to do that without making my son feel uneasy." Something like that.

I like kcab's suggestion, too.

Also, when I wrote part 3, I assumed that your son got a lot of good math instruction at school. If he learned AMC8-related stuff at home and just did extra long division worksheets at school, I might just leave it at "We're uncomfortable with the media attention."

(Oh, and someone needs to tell the teacher to stop revealing private information about your son, whether or not it's true. She has no right to divulge personal information about a student, and besides, she also has no idea how the other kids will start reacting to your child as a result of her inappropriate (and made-up?) comments. I would phrase it just that way --- to her boss.)

ETA: There could be a bright side here. For example, the principal seems to be recognizing that there is such thing as a kid with a lot of math talent. This is actually a refreshing change from the usual lines like "All kids are gifted."

It also occurred to me that his teacher could be struggling with the idea of giftedness. Perhaps she told the kids that your son studies math for 5 hours a day because she wants to believe that any ten-year-old can score in the top 1% on an 8th grade test simply by studying a lot.

It is kinda of neat to hear the sort of hoopla typically surrounding sports to be focused on academics. In sports, it seems common to hear like: "We won the regionals, next we will win the state." A difference between statistics and positive thinking.