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    Joined: Feb 2011
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    Originally Posted by st pauli girl
    Here's a recent thread: traumatizing books and movies

    Also, just a quick comment on Charlotte's Web. I cried for weeks after I read that one because Charlotte dies...

    EXACTLY what I was going to mention.



    Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.
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    We've had these issues for years. DD11 has outgrown it for the most part. DD9 still struggles. If it is a movie with a happy ending, we sometimes let her watch the end first. She seems to be able to get through some of the stressful stuff as long as she knows that it comes out ok. Using this method she has learned to love Miyazaki movies, i.e. Nausicaa, My Neighbor Totoro, Kiki's Delivery Service though she still can't handle Spirited Away. She finds them less disturbing for some reason.

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    Actual death is a tough one. I remember how heartbroken DS5 was the first time he lost a fish, and later when he lost his hamster. I intentionally worked on DS5 re: death because of the impending death of his quite elderly grandfather (who years later is thankfully still hanging on). I think more than anything it was getting a bunch of smallish tropical fish that helped him. There's only so much personal attachment one can have to a particular neon tetra in a big school, and when another small death comes in a fairly regular series of them, one begins to accept death as a fact of life. An ant farm might work well for a very sensitive little one, or maybe a pet bacteria colony. smile

    I really think that people are very adaptable, and that goes for gifted kids too. I'm not trying to minimize this problem, but I am positive that with few exceptions, there would be a way to train excessive sensitivity out of just about any young kid, although it would probably take a good deal of sensitivity and knowledge of the child to do it perfectly well.

    With media, I have intentionally pushed the boundaries with DS5 because I figure it can't hurt, and might even wind up deepening his potential for emotional understanding to encounter some things early and let them gel in his psyche. I encouraged a love of heroism for its own sake in him, which took easily as he's a typical little boy in some ways. It took considerable effort for him to enjoy stories without happy endings, but now he can enjoy bittersweet endings, or even a movie like "Cloverfield" where nobody survives. Now he enjoys a good story in its own right regardless of the ending (it doesn't hurt for it to be a monster movie laugh ). His current fave movie is "The Edge"-- I think he must've watched it four times in the last week, and he has a bunch of lines memorized. I know that at one point he would've been completely unable to watch that movie.


    Striving to increase my rate of flow, and fight forum gloopiness. sick
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    Similarly here.

    We worked on de-sensitizing. So for some of the stories with very mild bully or teasing of another child (one or two B. Cleary books come to mind, way below lexile level, but useful), we would talk about why the author wrote it that way.

    And for other stories/movies that we, the parents, know the ending to, we would tell the child how the story ends and that it all works out.

    But yes, we delayed Charlotte's web for an extra year and decided to tell child the ending before we read it.

    Best wishes!

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