Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional Autism?? Aspergers??

Thanks Kristen!

Well, according to the "questionnaire" that I had to fill out and his teacher had to fill out... Mine, yes, ADD/ADHD is a possibility. The teacher's, no, it's not. So the doc wanted to try meds for one week and my husband said NO WAY because "he's a 5 year old boy."

So I don't know what to do now.

I haven't seen the questionnaires for ADD/ADHD, but when we did the ones for Autism/Asperger's, more weight was given to the parents' reponses than to the teachers', when there was a discrepancy. They figure that you know your kid better and in more circumstances than the school does!

As a side note, I can't quite believe that a week would be enough of a trial for any kind of medication they might be considering--does that ring true with anyone who has tried it?

I agree with Kristen-- don't rely on the ped.'s assessment. Our very good ped. just couldn't see DS's Asperger's for years.

You would know very quickly if the classic ADHD meds (stimulants) improve things; and probably also quickly if they make things worse. Be aware, though, that some kids get too hyped up on these meds (think too much coffee, irritable and sleepless). This is all the more true if it's an anxious kid to start with. I would be concerned about giving stimulant ADHD meds to a child who is already underweight, because they can suppress appetite.

Asperger's can look a lot like ADHD; many doctors feel that Asperger's includes a significant attention component, some are willing to dually diagnose. You might want to find a highly trained specialist to help you tease out these issues.

Best wishes,
DeeDee

Thanks ladies. She did give more "weight" to my questionnaire, that's why she wanted to try the meds. She said that we would see an immediate change in his behavior. But since my husband is ADAMANTLY opposed to trying it, I guess we'll never know.

I put a call into the doc today to let her know, she said that she'll refer us to another counselor/specialist if we didn't want to try the meds.

Thanks Lauren, I hope you find something that works for your DS as well!

KD976, I think your DH is not wrong to feel as he does about meds; I know that at that age we felt it was a drastic measure for a small child, and we weren't there yet. Especially since you don't have a solid dx yet, it is within the bounds of reason to be extremely cautious.

Here's a strategic question: how much time does your DH spend with your son? Does he take him to scouts/ supervise him in church or supermarket/ deal with him in situations that require DS to pay attention? If not, you might want to arrange for some of that kind of time, just so your DH has some of the same experiences you have had.

I found that spreading out the responsibility for supervising DS made us observe the same issues, which means we have been able to be more unified when it comes to treatment options. If DH happens to be in denial because he hasn't seen what you've seen, then letting him experience the difficulties might help.

Best,
DeeDee

Another resource might be to join a neurodiversity board to ask others on there what their experience with the medication has been. Based on the topics I've seen, there have been very mixed results, but ADHD meds do tend to cause weird reactions for Aspies unless they are co-morbid ADHD.

If he's stimming the way you describe and has the gross motor deficiencies, I personally would lean more toward Aspie than ADHD (being aspie myself), but you should definitely find a professional to diagnose and not rely on a pediatrician at all. There are very few people who have had any luck with their PCP noticing autism traits or even believing a confirmed diagnosis. It can be especially more difficult to pick up on in gifted people.

I talked to his ped last night about no-meds and everything else. She referred me to a counselor who also works with special needs kids. So I'm going to call his office today to make an appointment. Luckily DH isn't opposed to that, so that's half the battle. I agree that meds in such a young kid is a stretch (for me), but I was willing to try it to see how everything worked out.

DeeDee, he doesn't spend as much time with DS as I do, but in the Fall that will change. Their new school is just up the street from DH's work, so he'll have to take them to and from school everyday. I think that will be a real eye opener for him since he's never had to be on "kid duty" (so to speak) every single day of the week.

I'm very interested to see what this counselor has to say.

You guys are great, again, thanks a million.

That's good, KD-- hopefully the counselor will put you onto a good track.

Just so you are forewarned: A regular counselor or psychologist may or may not be equipped for what you need. Since your DH agrees to it, it may be a good start-- and yet depending on that counselor's qualifications, it may or may not be the solution you are looking for. Give it a go, and keep your eyes open.

We had DS in talk therapy with a regular psychologist for something like a year (age 4-5); after that year the psychologist recognized that she wasn't doing nearly enough for him and got us into the autism clinic of a children's hospital, which is where we should have been all along.

If you're thinking it's ADHD, you may or may not find these resources helpful-- they're geared toward Asperger's/autism:
http://www.aspergersyndrome.org/Home.aspx . There is a Local Resources link where you can search for experienced diagnosticians.

It is hard to get a correct diagnosis for a kid whose smarts can mask the disability, and hard to find the right professionals to help. You may need to use all your parental ingenuity on this.

Kudos to you for persisting.
DeeDee

Thanks, that's the same thing friends of mine with autistic kids have said about the counselor/psychologist. Hopefully just getting the DH to agree to it will help everything move right along.