Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional Need advice/help/a shoulder to cry on please

They did evaluate him. Problem is he was a perfect angel that day. There's no speech delay which was what they were hoping to get him in under. The people I was working with tried to find someway to qualify him, but he's not an in the box kid and didn't fall in any of their boxes. He's not autism spectrum, no motor delays, etc... Just severe issues with change and sensory things. I was told that until the tantrums interfere with school then they can't officially do anything.

To the poster about what they did with their ADHD kid, The time warning thing helps. We've been doing that for awhile. Also we have a wall chart that lists everything we do during the day and I change it for each day. There has been a bit of improvement with that. I'd LOVE to give rewards, but up to this point they don't seem to have any effect at all on him...

This sounds a lot like how DS was when he was younger. He'll be 6 in September and he still has the occasional fit. While it's nice to not have him screaming all day the fits seem to be more intense now. He also didn't sleep through the night or take naps.

I noticed you said that he's on Benedryl. Have you noticed if things get worse when he takes it? It triggers crazy behavior in DS (as does strawberries).

I agree with the previous poster who talked about giving him warnings about when things are going to change. This seems to really help with DS. If we have to go somewhere I start telling him a while before. He can get pretty upset with transitions so he needs this. We stick to a pretty strict routine and even so I still warn him when we're about to move to something new.

I use praise a lot for DS when I catch him doing something good. I don't know about your son but DS doesn't care about any type of punishment. If I tell him that he can't read he'll tell me that he didn't want to read anyway. If I take away his toys he'll play with a stick or a rock. He doesn't care enough about anything for it to make a difference if I take it away or not.

I wish there was an easy answer for this. It does get better but I know that it's so hard. You're already sleep deprived so it makes it even harder to deal with the behavior.

What do you do when he throws a fit? I've tried so many different things. For DS it seems like the fits are just something that he needs to get out and then he's ok. He told me a while back that right before he has them his brain fills up with thoughts and they start going round and round. Then his brain hurts and I guess the fit is him trying to make it all feel better. All I know is that after the fit it's my brain that hurts

What I've been doing lately is holding him really tightly until it's done. There's no trying to reason with him because he's not really aware of what's going on around him. He'll kick and hit if he gets really mad so holding him prevents him from hurting the other kids, me or breaking something in the house. While I'm holding him I try to get him to take deep breaths and I whisper to him to try and calm him down. He said that helps him get over the fit. I think I'm going to teach him to meditate soon to see if that helps too.

I hope that you find something that works for you! I know how completely draining it can be.

The deep sensory hugs are a recognized treatment for sensory overload. There is even a device that a person can crawl into that simulates hanging in a snug blanket, created by Temple Grandin after watching cows calm down when tightly penned. a soothing voice is also helpful to us all.

Another idea for transitions is using a digital camera to take pictures of who or what is next. The pictures can be sequentially ordered as activies will occur. Could even make a game or give choice of which goes first.