Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy rant about school/behavior "points"

DD is ranting and is in hysterics as I type this (no point in talking to her until she is calm).

So here's my rant:

Her school's 5th grade is assessed for behavior on a point system. Students lose a point every time they break a rule. They start out with 100 points and after the grading period is over, this number is converted to E, S, N, or U.

My daughter has lost 6 points in two weeks:

-reading a book after she was done with the assignment (I guess the teacher thought she was reading instead of the assignment?)

-reading a book after math class had started (she was reading during transition time but didn't stop when math class started)

-not bringing a jar to school for a project

-not doing the homework which was assigned while she was in GT pullout (she never checked with the teacher to see what she missed but the teacher didn't communicate to the kids either)

and two other similar incidents.

She is not losing points for cheating, lying, arguing, talking back, talking during instruction, being mean to others, etc. But she takes it personally that the teachers think she is "breaking rules" for these minor infractions.

I want the teachers to practice what they preach! As parents, we have access to the gradebook on the internet, and grades are posted late, wrong and in the wrong weight-category on many occasions. Where are the behavior points for their mistakes? DD's current social studies grade includes a classwork assignment that is listed as an exam grade and she got a 60 for not coloring in two pictures. The math project she turned in weeks ago hasn't been graded. It makes me want to throw things, so I know why it makes DD want to have hysterics too!

And I am a TEACHER so I know how to keep my gradebook in order, why can't they?

(Yes, I know how to communicate with them properly and advocate for my kid and will do so after I calm down... I just needed to RANT.)

Definitely time for a conversation...It sounds like they're punishing her for finding constructive ways to keep herself from boredom.

Arrrrrrrrghghghghgghgggh!

The same teacher that keeps picking on my DD assigned a glue-together flashcard assignment with a one-to-one correspondence of fronts to backs. The fronts weren't explicitly paired to backs before they were to be cut out so it was also a matching exercise.

I found one flat-out factual error (the "carbon dioxide-oxygen cycle" was deleted and the "nitrogen cycle" was in its place) and two cards were so vague as to be impossible to answer. One card said "Plants and animals release ____ as a product of respiration" and the other said "Plants and animals release ____ as a result of respiration." The two answers left at the end were carbon dioxide and nitrogen. CO2 could answer either card but N doesn't answer either.

She just now went to bed after frustrating hours of trying to put it all together. I'd have given her permission to take a zero on the assignment but she already "lost a point" over it. :-( This assignment was done in class during GT pull-out.

This same teacher deducts points for things listed in my rant above.

Her language arts teacher (a different teacher) wouldn't let her read Pride and Prejudice for a realistic fiction project (because it's historical fiction!).

What is this world coming to?

I hate public school. Even the "good" ones. I asked my daughter today if she wanted to be home-schooled and she said "no". *Sigh*

The latest thing with our very nice teacher is that DD8 has to learn addition and subtraction facts before the end of the year. Teacher is complaining that she isn't learning them fast enough which is all well and good. But DD8 now thinks she is not good at math (this from a girl who scored in the 98th percentile on her non-verbal Cogat). I explained to her that speed and intelligence have nothing to do with each other.

Then our teacher said "And also she wants to do, what she wants to do." I tried a brave smile and said I had talked to the gifted teacher about this "problem" and that it is a hallmark of gifted students.

I DO feel for the teachers, I really do. But when you put so much time into dealing with your gifted child, and then having to smooth things over with the teacher, who doesn't seem all that thrilled that your child IS gifted.....

*Sighs again*

OMG that is awful!!!

My DS went through something similar (not as bad) from year 3 - 6, and it was the the bane of my life. I think I counted the days down until he started high school. The school had a "Passport" thing going and it was meant to reward good behaviour. It was actioned throughout the year with the upshot being a whiz bang excursion at the end of it if you managed to attain a BLUE passport (there were 3 colours). If you did as you were asked you received a stamp in the passport. Well needless to say if you behaved all the time you received very little, after all you didn't need to be asked did you? DS had an extreme sense of justice, not just for himself but for all the kids that behaved, and most days when he came home from school and hit the front door the rage would start. I ended up going to the school and saying to them that I didn't have a problem with them using it as behaviour modification but what if your child's behaviour didn't need modifying?. Anyway they learnt the error of their ways when at the conclusion of the year all the blue passports belonged the worst behaved kids! Ha

The passport was bad enough but I can only begin to imagine the frustration you must be feeling.

I understand your frustration. My son is failing many subjects b/c he doesn't write. Major project must be done in class( so they know I didn't do it) incomplete so F in three different subjects. The kicker is he will be kicked out of Gifted pull out if he doesn't earn a B average in the regular classes. They are so anal about their way is the only right way. I am a teacher too of special needs kids. Haven't they heard of differetated instruction. We won't even talk about behavour.

This may help in your efforts to keep dd8 from thinking she's not good at math.
http://www.mathsolutions.com/documents/9781935099031_message18.pdf

That reminds me of a time when a dear friend and I were at lunch. He was trying to figure the tip and was taking awhile to do so. He's a mathmetics PhD and I teased him about it. I got a quick lesson about the difference between arithmetics and mathematics. :-)

LOL - I've given that lesson many times. ;-)

I hated math through elementary school. But discovered I loved it once I hit algebra. I think some of the curriculum used today does a much better job presenting math in a more interesting light from the get go by introducing algebraic thinking.

Well said, MON. I was thinking along the same lines. Zarfkitty, luckily this is fifth grade, and your DD hopefully can learn some perspective - I know that's hard, because at that age everything is immediate and there is no "long view." My DS is going through something similar to your DD's experience, and I've debated whether to go to war with the teacher over it. I sometimes need perspective, too, to realize that teachers aren't perfect but generally their intentions are good.