Thanks Kriston. I really think that I do want to try it. I'm going to wait and see what happens with the principal and then really decide. I'll let you guys know!

Good luck with your decision, Jamie.

I had a long talk with DSs teacher, I feel a lot better about the whole situation and now feel she will work with me. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. I think a lot of the problem lies in DSs refusal to do work, he's refusing more than I thought, and they're having a hard time placing him because they don't know if he doesn't know or just won't do it. They are willing to meet him where he's at but he is giving them mixed messages about what he can do.

Do you think that you can get a better feel for where he's at instead of the teachers? Has he said why he's not doing the work?

I don't know. I'm not sure if he has ADD, there are some signs, or if he's overwhelmed by the amount of writing that he's rebelling against everything. They are adjusting things so that while he still has to do the writing they're taking some pressure off of him there. Or it could be that he just doesn't want to.

I asked him once and he said he has known this stuff for a long time and doesn't want to do it anymore. The problem is he has to do it enough to show them he can do it. I've been sick(kindergarten germs are going to do me in) but I hope to meet with his reading teacher soon.

Good luck!

Well, we are joining the ranks of the disappointed group here. We met with the school staff re: possibly having DS5 do online EPGY accelerated math while the other kids are learning letters or basic math. It turns out that DS5 has not been showing them his abilities in school (or else they're not seeing it). Their hearts are in the right place, but their reasons for DS not being ready to do the accelerated program don't match up with the program itself. Lots of stuff about social well-being, and all-around development (including large-motor skills). We mentioned that we were talking 20-30 minutes, but that didn't help. I think the big thing is that for some reason DS is not participating or talking in class the way they thought he would. So if they're not seeing it, I guess I can see why they would be hesitant to give him anything different, but we've got to figure out why he's not showing them what he knows.

Another big disappointment is that the teacher, who I really like a lot, does not seem to get that DS does not and will not know the answers to everything that she asks him, especially when she is asking some very advanced things. She told us she was surprised he didn't know the answer to a 3rd grade type math question. We told her we wouldn't expect him to know that - he has never had any formal math training, but that he loves math and wants/is ready for a regular formal math curriculum (he's probably at 2nd grade level in most math). I suggested they do some end-of-year assessments to see where his abilities lie. Random questions that seem destined for him to fail do not seem appropriate.

There are some good things though. The teacher has gotten DS to write and spell, which he refused to do for us at home. He's gone from nothing to pretty decent. And he's reading aloud to us with more confidence. And they're sending home appropriate reading materials. And there's a neat little problem-solving pullout.

The worst part is that they don't see him as having well developed expressive speech. This was the big shocker because DS's large vocab and highly advanced language skills are what people notice about him. In fact, we didn't even talk about that with the school because we thought it was so obvious. They are not seeing the same kid we are. (This might be related to DS's lack of certain sounds plus perfectionism. He might be embarrassed to say certain words if he can't say them correctly. Happily, DS just qualified for speech therapy, so I hope that helps, and it's not that he's just checked out already.)

So we've decided to get EPGY at home, and report to the school how he's progressing. Maybe if they see some of the reports from that program on his abilities, they will believe that he's ready. Another reason I wanted him to be able to do this at school is that DS does not like school much, expect gym, computer, and library, and I thought he'd really like to do some math (he asks for math problems at home all the time). I said at the meeting that I guess it's pretty common for k'ers to not want to go to school (I know I didn't), but from the looks on their faces, I'm guessing it's not really all that common. They said I told them he was happier, and I said, yes he is - I no longer have to drag him to the car, he walks willingly.

Sorry so long. I am disappointed, but hopeful because I think the teachers/principal all want the best for our DS, and they are a really great bunch of people. Since I like them all, it makes the disappointment harder to swallow, I guess.

What is your son's personality? Is he normally shy except around people he is very familiar with?

My son, now 16, very rarely participates in class discussions etc,never has and it is always mentioned on his reports as an area in which he could improve (even with the teachers with which he has a wonderful rapor).Somehow I don't think that is going to happen! He has never liked to "stand out" and will therefore not willingly draw attention to himself.

You mention that they don't think he is participating the they thought he would. Are you also surprised by this apparent lack of participation?

Do you think that your son isn't participating because he's bored and has just tuned the lesson out? Is he shy? I can't believe that they wouldn't let you guys even try EPGY in the classroom. But it is good news that he's getting good books sent home!

I'm sorry, SPG. If there's anything I can do to help, it's yours.

Keep us updated, Jamie B.

So sorry SPG. Poor little guy.