I have learned quite a bit from this forum and appreciate that it prepared me well for a phone call I received this morning from my ds8's teacher. She is concerned that he seems depressed in class. She has spoken with his pull-out GT teacher, who said he does great in her class (duh - he is getting almost one on one attention and is playing with k'nex and lego mindstorm - what's not to love.) My immediate response was to say (quite bluntly) "He's bored!" My ds has mentioned his being bored more as the year progresses and has been saying things like "I would like school/homework better if I learned something."

I don't know if she is fully aware of the results of his testing (WISC-IV FSIQ of 146 and VCI of 152) or how to work with him. His first grade teacher and the GT teacher from last year told us that they don't remember when they had a student of his level, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised that his second grade teacher doesn't know what to do with him.

The good news is that everything I have been sharing with my dh in my crash course in the world of GT has definitely sunk in. He flipped out when he heard about the conversation and immediately began researching our rights.

So now, she wants to have a meeting with us and a few other people to discuss what we can do for him. Yippee!! I don't have to be the pushy parent to get a meeting with them. Now to get my notes in order and to go through all of the "going to meeting" threads I have seen around here...

One question - would it be a good idea to have ds there for part of the meeting?

Good question. I'm still adjusting to the idea of some children attending parent-teacher conferences, let alone a gifted planning meeting. Here's something for the pro side but I think it would be unusual to have a child attend the gifted planning meeting.


P.S. I'd plan to leave him at home unless someone from the school specifically asked for him to be at the meeting.

I would not have your son at the meeting.

Do, as your DH has and research, research, research, and not just your rights but your school and district policies as well. Know what is written and what isn't written. Sometimes, it just takes telling them (school/teachers/principals) that they can do something(it's not written that they can't) to open their eyes to other options.

I might have different opinion. Your DS is the subject and his feelings are what you are working toward? Or are you discussing schooling and what programs there are and whether he'd fit in?

My dd7 advocates well for herself so at regular old conferences, we have started taking her. She brings something to do if she is bored, but she has an ear toward the conversation.

This does two things: It keeps the teacher from doing silly things like comparing her to other children, putting a negative spin on her behavior, etc. And dd is right there to pipe up when she has a thought. That is how dd got put in a higher math in second grade. Her grades had been sliding, and we said "dd, what do you think is the problem?" She said "it's really hard to focus when everybody takes so long to learn things". She went on with specific things that happened in class, giving a new viewpoint to the teacher. THen she asked if there was a harder class she could go to.
If she hadn't been there, I don't think any of that would have happened.
It just makes it easier when the teacher starts to balk, I turn to dd and ask her to clarify the issue. It often brings the solution along a little easier.

However, if the discussion is about how the adults are concerned about your son, what can be done for him, etc., I probably wouldn't have him there. We DON'T take our 2E 9 year old son to conferences because often the teachers just don't understand him and can respond with some stupid remarks that could really hurt him if he knew his teacher was thinking that.

Go with your gut. You know the parties involved and the agenda. You can send him out any time you want to discuss something without him, and bring him back for questions. (that's what we do with ds9)