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    Joined: Jul 2009
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    DH wants to talk to our pediatrician about some of the things that DD is doing. The biggest problem is when it comes to DD walking. She's 6 months and insists on practicing walking all the time! She can already pull up on her own, cruise, cruise from one piece of furniture to another, stand for a few seconds on her own, and take a few steps if she's holding on to our hands.

    However, my MIL, who watches DD during the days, keeps insisting that "her bones aren't ready yet" and that "we're forcing her". But it's DD who keeps saying "up" when she wants to stand and practice or she'll do a very specific gesture when she wants to stand and there's nothing to pull up on (she leans forward reaches out her hands and tries to grabs my fingers). She even will make the sign for MILK when she's not hungry so I take her to the bedroom where there's more furniture for her to pull up on.

    For the most part DH trusts that this is DD doing this and we're not forcing her but then MIL starts with the whole she's too young, she's going to get bowlegged, etc. It's really ironic since DH was walking by 9 months.... (otherwise MIL is great but she really buys into a lot of old wife tales)

    So DH wants to talk to our pediatrician about a lot of the stuff that DD is doing to see if it's safe and how to deal with her doing these things. I'm a bit concerned how it will go over. We go to a group practice and weren't able to see our normal pediatrician last time. The other pediatrician was shocked by what DD was doing and said she was the most advanced baby she'd ever seen. Before that time we went to our normal pediatrician and she was surprised how early DD was with her milestones but DD was still too young to see a stark difference between her and other babies.

    I write this all to say I'm not sure how the pediatrician would take our questions? There's no denying that she's advanced but would the pediatrician just brush it off? It would be really nice to have someone to go to for questions about DD IRL. Has anybody had success talking to their pediatricians? Also, anybody know about any scientific research on early walkers so I can show DH and MIL that she's not "hurting her bones"?

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    I would not take her if she is doing fine but if it makes you feel better then you should. It depends on your pediatrician how they will respond, ours is great and would never make us feel bad about bringing her in. She is already 6mo at that age most of the babies stand in those play center things and I'm sure most of them end up fine. I'm not sure how much research there is to back it up though. She is your baby and you can make your own parental choices, not MIL. I have a great MIL and I'm sure some things she would do differently.

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    I guess, I was referring to our next well visit. Sorry i forgot to mention that. wink

    Part of the issue is that MIL will say something like that and then it in turn freaks out my husband and he starts second guessing our parenting style.

    I also wanted to mention that we've been dealing with some fear problems with her and it was another thing we were thinking of talking about the pediatrician went. She's had a lot of separation anxiety. She'll start crying if I even mention "I'm going to work" or if my husband is wearing his work clothes. She also freaked out this weekend over a toy and didn't even want to be in the same room where she first saw it because she got so scared. I know many kids go through separation anxiety but I wonder if part of this is exacerbated by her understanding some of the things we're saying and doing.

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    All sounds like normal development to me. Babies cry and fuss. It can be overwhelming at times. wink I would be very careful about dropping terms like anxiety to a pediatrician or (down the road) school professionals. Could come back to haunt you in the future.
    I don't know much about bone development but don't let MIL worry you.


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    I would not be concerned about separation anxiety, for DD2 it started around 5mo. DD2 is still very sensitive for certain things like loud noise, she is terrified of vacuum cleaner and other noisy household machines. Then on the other hand she is fearless when any kind of physical activity is concerned. For the separation anxiety it helped when she got so old that I was able to explain to her what will be happening and when will I be back. She still likes to follow me to the bathroom though smile

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    Between 6-15 months, anxiety is normal. Babies are supposed to exhibit fear, particularly "stranger anxiety" during this time. There is lots of research on the web regarding infant/toddler anxiety.
    As far as walking goes, all kids develop differently and as long as you're not pushing she probably is ready to start learning to walk. She wouldn't stand if it caused her pain so her bones most likely are ready.


    Shari
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    How do muscles and bones get stronger? Through exercise! As long as you aren't constantly forcing your child to walk when she is not interested, she's not going to do herself any harm, and she will make herself stronger.

    Virtually all babies are bowlegged at 6 months, regardless of whether they walk or not. Search "bowlegged babies" on the Internet if you need sources to cite. There are tons out there! They outgrow the bowleggedness as their legs get stronger. Walking might actually help things straighten out faster.

    A decent pediatrician will answer your questions about your child without any trouble. If you don't get decent answers, it may be time to find a new pediatrician.

    Babies aren't as fragile as many people think they are. Follow their lead and you're probably doing the right thing.

    Your daughter sounds like a go-getter, so I hope you'll encourage that in her. smile


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    This is purely anecdotal, but both of my children used a baby walker (the mobile frame with sitting/standing support) for a couple of months, at around your DDs age. I've got to say that it wasn't something we planned for, but the walker turned out to be an excellent solution for our active, motivated-to-be independent children (and for me to have my hands free for a few minutes again!). I'm aware that walkers are somewhat contentious in some circles for much the same reasons your MIL states, but in our experience its use did nothing more than provide DS and DD with a safe way to explore autonomously, during that in between stage. It was a short-lived period anyway with DS walking alone by 8 mos and DD by 9mos, as may be the case with your DD. I personally believe that absolutely nothing could have hindered my children's attempts to get up and go (aside from the unthinkable... forcible restraint), and suspect your DD will continue to do just as she is doing, with or without your MILs approval wink

    All the best with your little one smile


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    Thanks everyone for the reassurance. No, I've never thought it looks like she's bowlegged. If anything she looks like she's ready to be a great soccer play with all the strength she has in her legs. laugh It's more the issue of DH getting freaked out about these old wife tales. Don't get me wrong, MIL is great, but she just buys into a lot of them.

    It turns out it's kind of a mute issue now because DD decided to take a few steps on her own yesterday! Yikes, because we still haven't really babyproofed.

    Originally Posted by Kriston
    Your daughter sounds like a go-getter, so I hope you'll encourage that in her. smile

    Oh, and we definitely do that! MIL stays with her during the days and she prefers to do more mental things with her. DD has a floor mat with numbers that she takes out and then puts them back in. More stuff like that. When we're home we try and do more of the physical stuff cuz MIL gets freaked out by it.

    Originally Posted by TMJ
    This is purely anecdotal, but both of my children used a baby walker

    We're thinking of buying one. We're actually abroad this summer so we'll probably wait until we get back state side but by then the way she's going she'll probably be walking!


    About the separation anxiety. For us it's just hard to tell what is normal or not. All my friends are SAHM so they don't really have this problem as much...

    Thanks again for the help!

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    I agree the walker or excersaucer are good choices. I used the excersaucer and it was a lifesaver with my very active little man. On child proofing - watch out for chairs or anything she may grab onto that can flip over. My ds would grab onto our dining room chairs when walking and one flipped over onto him resulting in a trip to the doctor's office. He wacked his noggin very hard and was pinned under the chair but fortunately was fine. I mention this bc it never occured to me that a chair could flip like that. It was on a hardwood floor which I guess made it more prone to topple.
    If your dd turns out to be as active and adventurous as my ds you will want to be watchful for things they can use to climb up. When my ds was 2 he used a childsize chair to climb up on the kitchen counter and then used a box on the counter to climb on top of the refrigerator to get to some candy! Imagine my surprise. I thought he was napping and only had him out of my sight for a few minutes to tinkle. Oh, he climbed out of his crib to get to the kitchen in the first place. He was and still is very fast and stealth. shocked

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    Originally Posted by FrustratedNJMOM
    If your dd turns out to be as active and adventurous as my ds you will want to be watchful for things they can use to climb up. When my ds was 2 he used a childsize chair to climb up on the kitchen counter and then used a box on the counter to climb on top of the refrigerator to get to some candy!


    Oh man, I got a good laugh out of that! Although, I'm sure it was quite scary for you at the time. We have a crib tent on our crib so hopefully that will help with these candy quests. Unless, of course, she figures out how to unzip it from the inside. Probably not too unlikely since she's already figured out how to use zippers...

    DD is already pretty head strong so I could see that. She's OBSESSED with my laptop and will do absolutely everything and anything to get to it and play on it. There's just nothing we can do to steer her away from it.

    Also, thanks for the mention about the chairs. I didn't really think of that either. We have hardwood floors so that could be an issue.

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    My pleasure. No one ever warned me about the danger of chairs & I don't recall ever reading about it.
    You know the more I think about it, I think ds was actually sleeping in his crib converted to a toddler bed at the time. He was so good at quickly and quietly climbing out of his crib that we had to convert to lessen the chance of injury from a fall.

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    Originally Posted by newmom21C
    Originally Posted by TMJ
    This is purely anecdotal, but both of my children used a baby walker

    We're thinking of buying one. We're actually abroad this summer so we'll probably wait until we get back state side but by then the way she's going she'll probably be walking!

    Thanks again for the help!


    Just an FYI, having worked in daycare for several years, licensed daycare homes in the state of California are not allowed to have walkers on the premises. I believe the Pediatric Association also has warning about them now. They have a tendency to get kids places they aren't ready to get to and often end up going down stairs when they aren't supposed too... They cause a LOT of injuries which is why they aren't allowed in daycare homes.

    I needed SOMETHING to put my guys in so that I could get a minute or two of peace so I got a bouncy seat. It's a seat in the middle of a counter type thing with toys attached. The bottom is like a saucer, but they also have legs that can be put down if you want it more stable. Both of mine loved it even after they were walking.

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    Originally Posted by Wyldkat
    [quote=newmom21C]
    Just an FYI, having worked in daycare for several years, licensed daycare homes in the state of California are not allowed to have walkers on the premises. I believe the Pediatric Association also has warning about them now. They have a tendency to get kids places they aren't ready to get to and often end up going down stairs when they aren't supposed too... They cause a LOT of injuries which is why they aren't allowed in daycare homes.

    I needed SOMETHING to put my guys in so that I could get a minute or two of peace so I got a bouncy seat. It's a seat in the middle of a counter type thing with toys attached. The bottom is like a saucer, but they also have legs that can be put down if you want it more stable. Both of mine loved it even after they were walking.

    Thanks, just to clarify we were actually thinking of getting DD a jumperoo or something more along those lines, if we do get her something at all. I just tend to lump them all together. I've actually heard that too and know what you're talking about.

    DD's not a big fan of swings/bouncers. She wants to be moving ALL THE TIME and gets really upset with the restrictions. We actually picked up a swing for her at a yard sale (thankfully it was only $5!) but she only used it when she was about nb-1 month old.

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    It was not my intention to sound flippant regarding the known hazards of walkers and I sincerely apologize if anyone read my post that way. Child safety must always be the top priority and like all things that children can be exposed to, parents must weigh potential benefits against potential harm. FWIW, we also had a bouncy seat, which my children really enjoyed at around 4/5 months. I guess the novelty unfortunately wore off pretty quickly with them as later on, they tended to fuss so much when put in it, it wasn't worth it.

    Either way, words will not adequately describe what both my children were like when they were 6 months of age... you really had to see it to believe it, but "full-on" probably comes closest. They could pull up, cruise beside furniture and/or climb well, all before crawling (which DS never actually did). None of the 'cute little kid sitting quietly' stuff that my friends have. Child-proofing of our house happened early out of obvious necessity, and to this day we have only the barest essential furniture. My beautiful DD (now 18mos) stood at the window this very morning, naming and counting all the species of birds in our garden (impressive but not all that unique on this board wink ). Then, as I turned to talk to DS3.25 she stealthily did a chin-up on a (very high) cupboard, swung her leg over, and stood up in order to get a DVD. Apparently, that was nothing to worry about as DD then said "Its alright, see I got it! I be careful". What do I do with that? I also had a friend recently tell me that we shouldn't encourage DD to ride DSs two-wheel bike (with training wheels) because she's not physically ready - DD is as tall as your average 3yo and can already ride the darn bike! Am I supposed to hide it from her? Anyone know a good book about children with advanced physical ability + above average intelligence but ND judgment skills? I'm so exhausted.

    Sorry for rambling... As a SAHM, its been a tough week 'at the office'. DS is disappointed that they don't do any maths in his new preschool and DD is, well, testing my sanity with every amazing moment. Hope everyone else is having a better time with all this!

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    Originally Posted by newmom21C
    DD's not a big fan of swings/bouncers. She wants to be moving ALL THE TIME and gets really upset with the restrictions. We actually picked up a swing for her at a yard sale (thankfully it was only $5!) but she only used it when she was about nb-1 month old.


    We had the same issue with the swing, but the saucer thing held their interest a lot better because of all the stuff to do on it, the spinning around and the incessant bouncing...

    Originally Posted by TMJ
    It was not my intention to sound flippant regarding the known hazards of walkers and I sincerely apologize if anyone read my post that way.

    Either way, words will not adequately describe what both my children were like when they were 6 months of age... you really had to see it to believe it, but "full-on" probably comes closest. They could pull up, cruise beside furniture and/or climb well, all before crawling (which DS never actually did). None of the 'cute little kid sitting quietly' stuff that my friends have. Child-proofing of our house happened early out of obvious necessity, and to this day we have only the barest essential furniture. My beautiful DD (now 18mos) stood at the window this very morning, naming and counting all the species of birds in our garden (impressive but not all that unique on this board wink ). Then, as I turned to talk to DS3.25 she stealthily did a chin-up on a (very high) cupboard, swung her leg over, and stood up in order to get a DVD. Apparently, that was nothing to worry about as DD then said "Its alright, see I got it! I be careful". What do I do with that? I also had a friend recently tell me that we shouldn't encourage DD to ride DSs two-wheel bike (with training wheels) because she's not physically ready - DD is as tall as your average 3yo and can already ride the darn bike! Am I supposed to hide it from her? Anyone know a good book about children with advanced physical ability + above average intelligence but ND judgment skills? I'm so exhausted.


    I didn't take it that way, it's just that having worked in a daycare home I had it pounded into my head so firmly that it just comes out whenever I hear the word "walker." LOL

    Your kids and my boys would get along GREAT! (and probably make both of us pass out... from exhaustion and terror.) Bear is only 2.5 and he is already pedaling my exercise bike standing and can peddle his tricycle better than his older brother can. I'm pretty sure he would be using his brother's bike if he didn't have the tricycle to distract him. At 18m he was busy climbing all the equipment on the big kids playground...

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    Originally Posted by TMJ
    Either way, words will not adequately describe what both my children were like when they were 6 months of age... you really had to see it to believe it, but "full-on" probably comes closest. They could pull up, cruise beside furniture and/or climb well, all before crawling (which DS never actually did). None of the 'cute little kid sitting quietly' stuff that my friends have.


    Wow, that sounds really familiar! DD is the same way and it is such a challenge to keep up with her. I see friends who have these sweet babies that are just happily sleeping in their strollers while they go out shopping and I just can't relate at all.

    DD has to be entertained and wants to be moving all over the place at the same time. Just this morning instead of eating she was cruising along her pack and place yelling "hey" to everybody so they'd come pay attention to her. smile


    Originally Posted by Wyldkat
    Your kids and my boys would get along GREAT! (and probably make both of us pass out... from exhaustion and terror.) Bear is only 2.5 and he is already pedaling my exercise bike standing and can peddle his tricycle better than his older brother can. I'm pretty sure he would be using his brother's bike if he didn't have the tricycle to distract him. At 18m he was busy climbing all the equipment on the big kids playground...

    Lol, it's good to know what I have to look forward to!

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    I'd speak to the pediatrician just for your husband's piece of mind. I very much doubt if anything is wrong, but that isn't my point. Your husband's concerns as a new parent, however he has come by them, are equally as valid as your own. You can bet there will be plenty of times in future when you worry unnecessarily about your child, and I'm sure you'd like your husband to speak to your concerns. I know MILs can be hard work for a new Mom, but you are very lucky to have an involved Dad. If you block out his concerns now, he may give up eventually and not notice things when you need him too later. I really don't think a good pediatrician would have any problem discussing this.

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