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    #4752 - 11/21/07 04:01 PM Re: Positive things about being gifted [Re: EandCmom]
    willagayle Offline
    Member

    Registered: 06/08/06
    Posts: 400
    Loc: Minnesota
    I guess I should tell you the "rest of the story" regarding my dad. He lived with us for 5 years. During that time he returned to relatively good health. We saw him through major medical problems the first 2 years, but after that he enjoyed relatively good health.

    Well in the summer of 2006, he decided to return to our home state to live with my brother. Dad was a brittle diabetic. My brother and his family took Dad out for a McFlurry one night last March. Dad ate a whole McFlurry then when he got home he gave himself an extra large bollus of insulin to make up for it and went to bed.

    Dad never woke up again. He died of an insulin overdose.

    So, while I was capable of helping him while he was with us, I wasn't capable of fixing everything.

    But thanks for all the nice comments.
    _________________________
    Willa Gayle

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    #4753 - 11/21/07 04:13 PM Re: Positive things about being gifted [Re: willagayle]
    EandCmom Offline
    Member

    Registered: 11/09/07
    Posts: 516
    Oh Willa Gayle, I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad. It is still wonderful that you were able to help him while he lived with you though. We can't control others actions - all we can do is the best we can do and it sounds like your best was exactly what your Dad needed. Sadly, none of us are capable of fixing everything, though I know we'd all like to. You should be proud of yourself for being able to help him as much as you did.

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    #4757 - 11/21/07 07:43 PM Re: Positive things about being gifted [Re: Dottie]
    Grinity Offline
    Member

    Registered: 12/13/05
    Posts: 7207
    Loc: Connecticut
    (((hugs))) Willa Gayle - sounds like keeping him healthy for 5 years was a big gift. Happy Thanksgiving.
    Trin
    _________________________
    Coaching available, at SchoolSuccessSolutions.com

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    #4758 - 11/22/07 04:51 AM Re: Positive things about being gifted [Re: Grinity]
    Lorel Offline
    Member

    Registered: 08/22/07
    Posts: 970
    Loc: New England
    Willa-

    I'm so sorry for your loss. If you don't find me too insensitive for saying so, it's almost funny, being killed by a McFlurry. I have a child with reactive hypoglycemia and I understand the difficulty of managing blood sugar.

    My Dad died of a blood clot after flying to Hong Kong in 2000. He fell down on the escalator at the airport and that was that. I like to think of it as the "stairway to Heaven". Since he was a German citizen, it took some doing to get through the red tape to bring him home to the US for burial. When we finally saw him in the casket, my sisters and I were laughing as we cried. He was embalmed in Hong Kong, and had a distinctly Asian cast to his features that had never been evident in life!


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    #4759 - 11/22/07 04:57 AM Re: Positive things about being gifted [Re: Lorel]
    Lorel Offline
    Member

    Registered: 08/22/07
    Posts: 970
    Loc: New England
    Trin-

    So am I a "slow talker"? LOL, I never really thought about it, but I do like to choose my words carefully.

    To politely give opposing testimony regarding speed talkers, I will say that I know several fast talkers who are not all that bright. I think it has more to do with personality type and impulse control than with intelligence.

    No offense intended, dear! I just wanted to put in my two cents worth.

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    #4761 - 11/22/07 05:13 AM Re: Positive things about being gifted [Re: Lorel]
    willagayle Offline
    Member

    Registered: 06/08/06
    Posts: 400
    Loc: Minnesota
    My whole family talks very quickly. I've had people ask me to slow down. I usually respond, "Listen faster!!" ;^)

    Quick speech is not uncommon in the gifted population. It is also a symptom of dyspraxia. I have recently spoken with a speech and language therapist regarding my rapid speech and that of my son, Rite (16). I was told in dyspraxia (which may occur in as many as 40% of highly gifted+ folks...in varying degrees), actually makes it difficult for my brain to hold all the information I need, take the adequate breaths and then say it. It's all in the ideation, organization and motor execution categories and dyspraxics have great difficulties in those areas. Basically, what I do is think what I'm going to say, take a quick gasp, spew the words...all of them no matter how many...then when I get to the end take another gasp. This ability actually makes me a pretty good singer as I can use a breath for a very long time.

    when I talk slowly, I feel confused and lose my train of thought. The therapist didn't feel I could be helped at my age, but she's going to work with Rite this summer. Basically he needs to learn how to breathe while talking.

    jsut some tidbits. Thanks everyone for the condolences. I do think the "death by McFlurry" thought is humorous. Dad would have loved that.

    My point in my post re: my contributions as a gifted adult, is that sometimes it may not encompass great contributions to mankind, but it may make significant improvements for those one-on-one times. I enjoy my intelligence, but I don't plan on altering the future of mankind with it:^)
    _________________________
    Willa Gayle

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    #4762 - 11/23/07 10:11 AM Re: Positive things about being gifted [Re: Kriston]
    Lori H. Offline
    Member

    Registered: 05/26/07
    Posts: 982
    I don't know if I am gifted because I was never given an IQ test in school. This was years ago, and there were no gifted classes back then anyway.

    At high school reunions people tell me that they remember me as one of the "smart" kids. I was bright enough that I usually made straight A's with little effort and in spite of attending a high school where I often worried if I could safely walk to my next class. I learned well in spite of having problems with anxiety and extreme shyness. I just read a lot at home and did most of my learning there. This was before everyone had computers in their homes and access to a wide variety of information.

    Being bright, possibly gifted, allowed me to score in the top ten out of hundreds of applicants for different government jobs and also a private company where there was a lot of competition. I scored higher than some people with more education than I had. I scored similarly to my husband on some tests which surprised me because he is obviously much smarter than I am.

    Unfortunately, my way of learning is different from my son's, especially with math. I was able to learn the school's way without coming up with or asking about alternative ways of solving problems. If I was told "this is the way you do this problem" then that was the way I did it and I did it without stopping to daydream about something else in the middle of the problem. My son always wanted to argue about math and do it a different way than I showed him. He would ask me questions that I didn't know how to answer. Until I had this child I really thought there was only one way to solve math problems and I didn't learn to think outside the box. We didn't do much math last year at all because I didn't know how to deal with it, yet he has been doing two lessons a day now for the last month on Aleks Middle School Math 1. Handwriting problems added to his difficulties last year and any time he had to do something like long division it was a nightmare. He prefers to do mental math whenever he can. I finally tried Aleks and that is working very well for him. I think if I were really gifted than I would be able to figure out how to help him with some of his 2E issues.

    Maybe I was only gifted at test taking. I would like for my son to be able to test well also and I really wish I knew how to help him with that. But I didn't have the handwriting difficulties or problems with fatigue or sensory issues that he deals with. He is scheduled to take the Explore test in January and I wish I knew how to help him prepare for that. I think he might have trouble filling in bubbles on a separate piece of paper. I think he will have trouble with the length of the test. Because of his sensory issues I think he might have trouble focusing on the test in a room full of other test takers. I think he might get too tired to concentrate before he is finished with the test. He is used to working for about 30 minutes and taking a break to move around at home. I don't know if I should ask for accommodations. Since he is homeschooled he has no IEP.

    I always thought I couldn't really be that bright because I don't have the "gift of gab" that my son and husband have. Because of my husband's intelligence and people skills he has had people tell him that he should run for mayor or some other office. Strangers have told me that my son might be a "politician" some day for the same reason. They are so much alike. When they speak it is obvious that they are very intelligent. I am very aware that my nine-year-old sounds smarter than I do. When he hears a story on the news he is better at retelling the story than I am. Yet I always made high scores on vocabulary tests. Tests just don't tell the whole story.




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    #4764 - 11/23/07 12:11 PM Re: Positive things about being gifted [Re: Lori H.]
    Grinity Offline
    Member

    Registered: 12/13/05
    Posts: 7207
    Loc: Connecticut
    Hi Lori,
    I'm glad to hear that your son is enjoying Aleks!

    I really like the way you are grappling with the idea that some skills are more valued and recognized than others. It's possible that your DH and DS are just a lot smarter than you are, but that isn't usually how it is.

    On one hand we usually value the kinds of experiences we are good at, so talky people ususally enjoy and value talking. On the other hand, it's hard to give ourselves "full credit" for the strengths that come most naturally to us. I was talking to a friend who was commenting on her number-crunching abilities in her work environment. She said that she feels uncomfortable being praised for the skills that she hasn't had to work to develop, that they just seem easy and fun to her, and strangly, not to anyone else. So some of us even feel badly, or at least strange, for our strengths!

    Do I feel the slightest bit embarrassed for being such a motor mouth and being "quick on the draw" with the advice and suggestions? I do! I think that I must be superficial, because I assume that everyone else has to think before they type. And in real time conversations I have to really try monitor myself so that I don't monopolize conversation or come off rude. I love this format because I can jump in and out of conversations to my heart's content and change topics whenever I start a new thread.

    Lori, You said:
    I think if I were really gifted than I would be able to figure out how to help him with some of his 2E issues.

    I think that you have figured out a lot about your son, and with time will figure out more and more. I base this on that you knew you had to homeschool, and you do. To me this is a significant accomidation! I hope you ask for accomidations for the Explore, although it may be a hopeless quest. When you compare what you have been able to figure out to what trained professionals have been able to figure out, I think you don't have to doubt your strengths. I'll bet that if you found an email list about gifted with disabilities, that you would be amazed at how much you have to share.

    ((shrug))
    My .02$ anyway!
    Trinity

    _________________________
    Coaching available, at SchoolSuccessSolutions.com

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    #4765 - 11/23/07 01:17 PM Re: Positive things about being gifted [Re: Grinity]
    EandCmom Offline
    Member

    Registered: 11/09/07
    Posts: 516
    Lori,
    Here is my 2cents too. I was labeled as "gifted" as a child and I definitely don't have the "gift of gab". I think that is more of an extrovert/introvert issue and gifted people can be either. Also, if you've read any of my posts in the 2e area, you know I definitely don't have all the answers for my 2e!!! :-)

    I'm with Trinity, I think you should ask for accommodations. Have you had him tested? Do you know what his issues are? If so, maybe submit some information from his doctor's telling what his problems are and what kind of accommodations would be needed. The worst that could happen is they would say no - and they just might say yes!!! :-)

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    #4766 - 11/23/07 03:21 PM Re: Positive things about being gifted [Re: EandCmom]
    Lori H. Offline
    Member

    Registered: 05/26/07
    Posts: 982
    When my son was seen by a developmental pediatrician two years ago at age 7 for handwriting and drawing difficulties, mild hypotonia, and coordination difficulties, she told us that we should do activities from The Out of Sync Child Has Fun and use Handwriting without Tears to help him with proprioceptive, vestibular and visual motor integration proglems. She had an educational psychologist come in to test my son with the WIAT. The educational psychologist that tested him noticed that he seemed to have vision problems, that he tired easily, and was fidgety and had trouble staying in his seat while being tested. Tests showed that he was grade levels ahead of age mates in reading and comprehension and math but only slightly ahead of grade level in spelling. Spelling was tested by having him write the words, which I thought was crazy since one of the reasons we were there was because his handwriting was sloppy and he couldn't write very long without getting tired. So he tested only slightly above grade level in spelling even though he was probably grade levels ahead in that area too, which makes me wonder even more about how accurate tests are for 2e kids. He tested grade levels ahead of age mates even though he only spent a couple hours a day doing what I would consider learning activities. The doctor and the educational psychologist were telling us he was gifted and the doctor said he needed to work on his motor skills at home so I went away thinking okay, we'll do that and he will be fine.

    My son is the only child at home and I am homeschooling so I didn't often have the opportunity to compare him to other kids his age except in his musical theatre class where there is only one other child his age and at Cub Scouts where my son refused to do any writing or drawing in front of the other kids.

    Since the developmental pediatrician did not give us a diagnosis other than confirming that he still had hypotonia and the sensory issues, I thought maybe he was just on the low end of normal but when he recently took a homeschool PE class and swimming lessons with younger children where the teacher called him a "wuss" for not being able to do some things, the lack of coordination seemed obvious. With the things we did at home the strength in this arms improved a little but the coordination did not. He still takes longer to learn dance steps and he still has some balance issues that he has to deal with and he doesn't have the endurance other kids have. I think his eyes still get tired faster than other kids although it has improved some after vision therapy that we did at home.

    He will be seeing the developmental pediatrician, a neurologist, and the developmental optometrist soon. Hopefully I will have answers soon and I can also ask the doctors to write something so we can get accommodations.


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