Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy and another meeting! advice welcome

DD 7 is HG with a severe LD in writing, with high school level achievement scores in reading. We've been hoping to transition her back to public school next year. We just met with the principal of the local elementary to discuss third grade possibilities. He said: he doesn't believe in grade skips because "research shows" it harms kids academically and socially; his teachers don't like to differentiate for gifted kids because they're overwhelmed by the needs of the kids at the other end of the spectrum; my daughter can help tutor other kids in language arts and this will be valuable for self-esteem; the school's priority is raising reading scores in the Grade 4 exams that all students have to write, and after Grade 4 we can talk again. There is a 1 hour a week gifted pull-out with the school librarian. We didn't even get into any LD support issues--he was in a rush. I'm thinking we have to keep HSing, since it's worked really well and our main reason for school was so I could work full-time (book project to finish!). Thoughts? Any advice welcome--the tutoring suggestion worried me, especially, but maybe I'm being overly sensitive?

Tutoring other kids in reading was one of the things our public school tried in third grade with my DD, it was a disaster. Sounds a lot like our situation in ELA. We have my DD attend public for ELA and homeschool the rest. If homeschooling is working then I would probably stick to that, then talk after fourth grade if you still want to put her back in public.

HHmm well he said all the wrong things and all red flags....can DD participate in a co-op so that you have some free time to work on your project? Would a HS buddy be willing to take her for a couple half days? Can you shift some HSing to the evenings when DH can do it while you work?

"We can't teach your daughter anything, but we'd like her to help us teach the rest of the kids." That's called slave labor, folks! What's in it for you?

This sounds horrible. DS7's current school is also rejecting subject acceleration and grade skipping. We are leaving to go full time homeschooling next year.

I don't know where you are, but in California, there are some public charter homeschools. They provides some in-school classes. You will not be able to work full time, but you can at least take your kid to school twice a week to up to 4 x a week (full day) depend on the program. And you will have more control of what she will learn at home since she will be spending more time at home.

PM me if you want to know more.

I doubt that every teacher feels this way. How brass of him to say that!
If homeschooling, charter schools, or switching schools, are not an option...I would suggest meeting with several of the teachers and see if you can find one who seems to be open to meeting the needs of your child.
When dealing with teachers & schools you need to be very careful with your choice of words. Don't make them think that you already assume that they can't meet the needs of your child. This tends to make them defensive. You need to use the word "if" alot and avoid the word "gifted" for some reason that word is taboo at some schools. I think that the best time to approach the teacher about a plan to differentiate is after they have had a few weeks to get familiar with your child.
I wish you luck which ever way the road leads!

Thanks, everybody!