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    Originally Posted by Grinity
    But - the topic of this thread is 'how do I talk to the teachers' which to me means that the parents knows that something has to change, but still imagines that the depth of change is something that can be handled in a single classroom.

    Good point.
    Elizabethmom, does the principal have the information about DDs scores? If not, it may help to bring the principal in the loop when you get the achievement scores. I've had better luck with DD's teachers than her principal, so it's not the first thing that pops into my head. wink

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    The principal has asked me to start with teachers before coming to her, I think that she is encouraging all parents to start with them, not just me.
    But, on a hopeful note, I found out that Florida Virtual School, which is free for us, has middle school online classes that might supplement the regular curriculum nicely (and not $$$ like the Northwestern gifted ones we have done) but I needed special permission to put a soon to be 4th grader in a 6th grade virtual classroom. The principal was the one to ask, she said that she'd sign anything like that. So, she "gets" some of it.

    Taking into account the wise opinions here, and blending them, it seems that jumping to the principal in only April, after a one hour preliminary conversation with the teacher for next year, might only get me in trouble, and DD, too. Perhaps I will push gently over the summer, by waiting until those achievement scores come in, perhaps if we get into DYS, etc., then having a general meeting with the principal to "catch up" (we did this last summer, it was pleasant but nothing concrete came of it) and start pushing harder.

    The principal has been different with DD5, perhaps because she knows us. She asked if we can put her in K next year, because it is such a "sweet year" and maybe skip 1st. I thought that was interesting, but confusing and not really bound by research or knowledge of PG kids.

    We moved to this suburb to be near this school because of the dual language curriculum and it totally stresses out my DH when he thinks that he commutes a long distance to work so that we could be here, yet it isn't working for us. Also, the girls are super sensitive and attached to their friends, even though they both admit in quiet moments that they don't really feel kinship except with their parents. So, those are some added details.

    I do think, as someone said above, that this is a private school with an expectation of having smart kids, and many of them are probably mildly or GT, but none at all like mine. Yet, the teachers have a hard time even imagining that mine would be so different than these other bright kids. This year's 3rd grade teacher drew a bell curve (and she drew it wrong, it was weird) and showed me that my DD is alone at the top, yet, when I ask for a more challenging curriculum she just doesn't do it. I don't think that they are equipped.

    My DH's response is sometimes that we should just move to a real city (we used to live in NYC, so we are snobs here in suburban Florida) - but I read these boards and know that that would not necessarily be a perfect solution, either.



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    But I ignored what Grinity said in my post, above.
    I guess I am not as self confident as I thought, because as I read your plain-speak, "it is time to grade skip" talk, it made me immediately think of all of the potential problems with it.
    I know, everyone here has been through it, and yes, underachievement is a real problem with DD9, but I really have to sit on that one.
    Thanks, Grinity.

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    Originally Posted by elizabethmom
    The principal has been different with DD5, perhaps because she knows us. She asked if we can put her in K next year, because it is such a "sweet year" and maybe skip 1st. I thought that was interesting, but confusing and not really bound by research or knowledge of PG kids.

    Actually this is not necessarily a terrible idea, especially if the K situation is not highly academic, is more child-led then 1st grade, and is half-day, and if the 1st grade year is the "learn to read year" when the teachers are very focused on leaving no child behind...

    This is how it is in our school system, and if we had stuck it out in the school system, DS7 would have had his good K year and would have skipped his dismal 1st grade year. (At least, he would have if I had had my way...)

    Of course, that doesn't mean this solution is right for your child with your school and your teachers. But if the principal is suggesting it--and the skip is really offered there for 1st grade and not just an empty promise--then I'd recommend that you at least consider it.

    If memory serves, I think this is a solution recommended by Dr. Ruf for HG+ kids, and I know a number of "regulars" around here did this and liked it.

    YMMV...


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    Oh! Thank you kindly. I will keep that in mind. Yes, the K is half day.

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    The half day helps a lot because at age 5, it can be a long day for a kid to sit *all day* in 1st grade. That extra year of half-day school can help a lot

    And with the half day, the child still has lots of time to pursue academic and other interests at home. So even if K is just circle time and coloring (I'm talking worst-case scenario--our K expereince was MUCH better than this!), it's better to have no academics than the wrong academics. Then you can give her what she needs at home.

    No pushing here. Just more details... wink Feel free to ignore completely!


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    We put DS in K so that he'd have a chance to learn "how to do school". He's accelerated for all subjects but I still think it was a good option for him. Next year he'll be in 4th and the "sweet year" will be behind him. He learned alot about routine and paying attention and following direction just getting in line for lunch etc. And he looks really cute in his class picture! LOL


    Shari
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    Ability doesn't make us, Choices do!
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    OK, you have all made a difference.
    This is what I just did:
    1) I wrote a note to the principal formally requesting a certain teacher (she had asked me to put it in writing for her files) and on the bottom I added that we will want a meeting towards the end of K to discuss skipping to 2nd grade.

    2) Then, here is the letter that I just drafted about DD9:
    (Feel free to criticize, but remember it is a small community and has to be a little warm and fuzzy)

    4/29/2009

    Mrs. G,

    I just wanted to let you know about my meeting with Mrs. R today and what "hubby" and I are thinking about next year.

    It was a nice meeting, Mrs. R took a lot of time to talk with me. She has great passion for her students! Understandably, her request regarding creating a separate plan for DD9, or subject acceleration, or anything else "out of the box" was that we wait and see after a few weeks of school, instead of planning now. I understand this because everything that I explained to her was new to her. I made sure that she understood that I was not telling her what to do, just explaining our situation. I was also just interested in meeting her and seeing what the classroom was like.

    I have gotten some help recently from people who know the profoundly gifted well, and a grade skip might be the easiest option for everyone. The exception is that DD9 is "on the fence" about how she feels about it. I am concerned about underachievement, but will know more when those standardized tests come back. Her IQ is in the profoundly gifted range, in the 99.9th percentile (so is her sister's) so if she is not being pushed at all then we start to see sadness, restlessness, and underachievement. I had no idea until recently, as you know, how unusual our kids are.

    I have never advocated grade skipping because my father did, my husband did, and my mother did, and only my father was really happy with it. My mother's was an extreme situation, she went to college at 16 and had trouble socially. My parents never allowed me to skip, I wish they had, actually.

    I think that maybe this summer, once we have had time to talk and think, we might want to meet you with just to discuss options, like subject acceleration, at the least. I am also feeling positive about that Florida Virtual School idea as a "mom and me" activity or something.

    Thanks,

    "Elizabethmom"

    So, is it too weak?


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    Have you used the Iowa Acceleration scales? It would add more weight to the argument of grade skipping if your DD was identified as a good or excellent candidate. I wouldn't put in the part about DD being on the fence as that clearly gives them an out.


    Shari
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    Quote
    So, is it too weak?
    In my opinion, yes. I think it can be reworked to be strong, warm and fuzzy. wink

    Quote
    so if she is not being pushed at all then we start to see sadness, restlessness, and underachievement
    I'd change this part from "pushed at all" to challenged.

    I'll sleep on it and hopefully inspiration will hit.

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