Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Child who doesn't want to be challenged

Eema
We have the same situation. Our 9 year old, who is easily well capable of most things, would rather sit and watch paint dry than sit down and do some prep. for school (even when the prep. is really interesting and challenging). Of course this leads to a lot of frustration as we try to get him to do the things that need doing, and we still haven't resolved it - other than to consider the fact that he is just plain lazy!
One teacher said "when he works he is 'okay', when he tries he is excellent"

Just one other thought. The Educational Psychologist said a lot of gifted children have a fear of failure, or being shown up if they don't perform. So many will shy away from work and situations where they can be seen to be failing or at least not performing as well as THEY think hey should. The recommended aproach was not to get angry, or lose patience, but to constantly reassure and encourage; but boy it's hard!

I have a ds6 who has underachieving/perfectionism tendencies. Thank goodness his teacher has understood this well, but he'll have a new teacher next year (for grades 1-3) and it's tricky to explain in the montessori context, where there's a lot of choice, that he needs to be pushed a bit to stretch himself. Otherwise he'll choose only easy work. In some ways it might be seen as going agains the montessori method of choice.

I can already imagine down the road how difficult it might be to explain that he may need to be challenged more when he's not seeking out the challenge for himself - but not too challenged (not so much that it's too far beyond his abilities). It's a fine line and might be a moving target to boot.