Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy What now?

Hi All,

I've just joined this forum after getting my kids' IQ scores back this week. I have one in the 99th percentile, and one in the 99.9th for their overall scores. The highest subset score for the one that is "only" in the 99th percentile is 99.7, so she doesn't qualify for Davidson's young scholars. I have a couple of questions.

1. Is anyone else dealing with kids of different abilities, and if it comes up (I take advantage of opportunities for my son that my daughter doesn't qualify for) how do I deal with it? I'm inclined to think it might be more harmful for her than beneficial for him.
2. Now I know I need to do something about the mindnumbing schooling. It's a charter school, and thus seems exempt from Georgia's mandated services for the gifted. Our neighborhood school is horrific, and the gifted magnet school doesn't start till 4th grade. I'm going to request grade skipping, and I've read "Genious Denied" and other research. Any advocacy suggestions? I think they thought me elitist when I tried to warn them that my son entering kindergarten was probably going to need something different (he'd started reading and doing multiplication) and was politely told the dismissive "we differentiate education for all children." Maybe the difference will be that now the are "certified smart" but I don't know. I am happy for the potential my children have, but unsure as to have to best continue to make sure they can meet that potential. And, frankly, it's a bit awkward to feel like I can't talk to friends about this, unless they happen to have really smart kids too. Anyone out there in GA (I'm in Atlanta)? The GA gifted group doesn't seem active.

Hi Kelsoren -
Welcome ((big smile))!

I only have one child, so I can't speak from experience, but joining Davidson will help your daughter as much as your son, because it's Parent Support as much as anything else! You can join the parenting email lists and talk to lots and lots of Moms and (and a few wonderful dads!) who will give you lots of support, information and BTDT experience - that will help BotH your children. Many families have some of their children YS and some not. Last month one of the Families opened their home to 6 local families for a potluck and games - all the children in all the families were invited. There are things for the YS kids to do, but you never have to tell that to your son or your daughter. I encourage you to join up, take what you like and leave the rest. Lots of discussion and resouces that are provided to your son would benifit your daughter.

As far as what to do for now - say more about your children, their ages, what they like, socially and intellectually, what you main worry is about them, what other books you have read, how they are with eachother. What bothers them.

Tell about your "relationship with the gifted identity." How's your family reacting to all this? Your childhood experiences will color how all this looks. Is homeschooling an option? Private schools?

Welcome to the role of Advocate for kids with Gifted Issues. I did notice that there is a gifted magnet school. I'd strongly suggest you made a lot of friends there, on the assumption that either of your children may be read to start any year now. Does anyone there know local resources for Highly and Profoundly gifted children? There is a link to the Ruff article on one of the other discussions that teases out the differences amoung "gifted children." You may be able to find local mentors amoung the parents who send their children to the local gifted magnet school, or afterschool activites that your kids would enjoy. Good luck!

I have one who tests well and is a YS and one who does not test well, for whom I have not yet applied. I assume that her test anxiety will let up and then she can be a YS too.

If one of your children was an excellent tennis player and had the opportunity to play in the state championships, would you decline because your other child might be jeolous? Our children have different relative strengths and weaknesses, and as good parents we need to be alert an in tune with those, making opportunities when we can and helping each child achieve and be successful.

I echo the previous post - the resources available to you, the parent, are outstanding.

I have one in Davidson and one that may not qualify. Honestly, Davidson was the wisest thing we have done in many ways. The support we get is amazing.

Granted - we have used it as a parent resource so far - not as a resource for my son. We may someday change that. If so, we will look to ensure that our daughter has some kind of outlet of her own too (assuming she doesn't qualify for Davidson.)

I'm not sure my son even knows he is in Davidson.... LOL