Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Any tips for SB-V test prep and a nervous mom?

Hi all!

My DS6 is taking the SB-V with a well-respected psychologist specializing in gifted assessment on Tuesday. DS's school-administered WJ-III scores from last spring indicate that he's a candidate for the YSP, so we've decided to get the ability testing done to see if he can get in.

I picked up one really good bit of testing advice here on the forum--though I can't give credit, since I can't recall which of you great and generous minds wrote it, I'm afraid; please forgive me. But it went something like this: tell the child that some questions will be too easy, but he should answer them anyway; some questions will be too hard, but he should try to answer them ALL--even if he's not sure of the answer!--as best he can. Brilliant!

I was wondering if there were any other words of wisdom that any of you could offer me/DS6. What do you wish someone had told you before your child was given an important test?

Some of this is about me; I'm dwelling on this. I knew DS was gifted, but frankly, his scores on the WJ-III were 1-2 standard deviations higher than I thought they'd be, so I'm a little freaked out/worried/excited about having him tested. (He's our first child, and apparently I assumed he was closer to an average kid than he is, I think because he's the only kid I really saw...)

Anyway, I'm not a "stage mom," and I'm not looking for ways to artificially drive up his score or that sort of thing. I just want to be sure we're getting as true a read of his ability as possible, his best possible honest results. The thing is, so many of our decisions about his future education--and since we're home schooling this year, so much of my future day-to-day life, too!--hinge on his scores, that I feel like this test is really pivotal for our whole family. Of course, I know that the results are just a number. But since the OTHER numbers were so much higher than I was expecting, I guess I feel the need to get some sort of secondary confirmation of his abilities before I'm quite ready to believe the WJ-III was right and he's THAT gifted. I'm the sort who gets as much evidence as is reasonable before making a decision, analyzes it quickly, and then makes a decision fast. This seems like pretty important evidence!

I think I'm babbling, but what I'm trying to say is that this isn't a case of my needing to hear "It's just a number; you're the expert on your kid." The results of the WJ-III would seem to indicate that I'm not, at least not like I thought I was. I may have sold DS short. So the results of this test may well be pretty important to my thinking about what we do with DS from here on out. Can he go back to public school with grade skipping and all the hassles and issues that entails, or will they just flat be unable to accomodate him? Will a private gifted academy be a good fit, or is that even going to be enough for him? Will we have to keep home schooling, or will I be unable to give him the opportunities he needs? Just how gifted is this kid, really? These are the questions I'm hoping the test will help us to answer.

Aside from not letting DS see my anxieties about this, what else should I/we be doing? Anything else I should say to him to prep him for the test? Advice, please!!! I need all the help you can share!

Thanks in advance!

Hi Kriston,
I'm so excited for you! I think it's great that you have gotten to this part of the journey.

It's quite normal to be nervous. Unfortunatly, I believe that it's best to shield your child from these feelings, which is almost impossible, but you are well on your way be talking to us. I would also reccomend that you journal on your own experience of being "identified." If your child is as emotionally perceptive as mine is, you will need to give him a brief verbal statement that is true, but as undramatic as possible. Practice what seems to fit you, or if I'm close, steal this:

Mom: Remember that old test you took last time?
ds: yes
Mom: Did you like doing it?
ds: oh, yes!
Mom: You know that DH and I are responsible for teaching you or finding places where you can learn, what's your job?
ds: ((results will vary))
Mom: I take my responsibility very serious don't it?
ds: ((child will usually agree and laugh))
Mom: It's always good to have help for important jobs, right?
ds: (( results will vary, but I imagine a big smile of agreement here))
Mom: And that's why I'm so excited about the new test at Dr. X's. After the test she'll be ready to help me do my responsibility to you! Yippee!

Then the trick is not to bring it up again with DS - HA! This isn't easy, but it think it's worth trying.

Other tips:
pack healthy food,
make a packing list with DS as a homeschool task,
bring favorite cuddly,
Plan travel route with DS as a homeschool task.
Keep bedtimes consistient.
Get outside each day for the next few days.
Arrive early, even a day early to acclimate.
Plan a fun activity, or swim at the hotel before the test.

Best wishes,
Trinity

I do agree with this, very strongly:


However I don't agree with this:

You are a bit off here dear, and it's stressing you out. The test is to help you understand your child better.
New understanding -> new choices -> new observations -> new choices.
With a level III and up child, there are no turnkey solutions. The tests help you know the child better, but only life experience will show you what works with your individual child. Sorry if this seems to obvious to bring us, but I belief that taking a look at your expectations of the test are too high. Not that I don't wish we all could give our child a test, then go though a door that would lead to all the resource we needed to do your big job. If you see that door, let me know!

Testing establishes a floor that your child isn't lower than. Testing teaches you more about the child. You will develop a new hypothesis. You will want to test your hypothesis by the materials you choose, and talent search tests in the future.

I believe that you will find the testing to be very worthwhile, even though it isn't what you are expecting. Try to lower your expectations and be open to what the testing will be 'in your particluar situation.'

I'm so pleased for you. We will be here, no matter what!
Trinity

The only advice I gave to my kids was to enjoy, work hard, do your best. My kids have all really enjoyed their testing (one on one time with an adult...rather rare in our family).

I'm having my DS 13 IQ test next week! I know he's old, but I never applied for the first 2 sons and now their test data is ancient. I'm not doing the portfolio stuff. DS13 is nervous ("What if my IQ scores went down?"). I told him that first they're not supposed to change and second it doesn't matter. If you don't qualify for YS(which I'd find difficult to believe) it's no big deal. If you do, great!

Kriston,

You have already received some great advice about what you SHOULD do.

I�ll share what we (my son and I) did wrong on the day he took the SBV last year.

I had Map Quest directions, but took a different route and got lost in high-crime area on the way to testing arriving in the nick of time rather than early as I had hoped. I�m sure the tester�s expectations were immediately lowered when my son explained that I got lost on the way there!!! My advice is to make a dry run to the office a day or two earlier.

I would also advise you tell your DS to take the test seriously and to do his best. I should have stressed this more with my son, but I was afraid of making it seem like too big of a deal! The psychologist made a point to tell me that DS was sooo relaxed that he actually slid out of his chair and unto the floor at one point!

One last piece of advice that I didn�t use for my son�s SB-V testing is to bring an ice-breaker item such as a favorite toy or book. My son had some favorite books to show a different psychologist when he was tested on the SB-IV at six years old. He developed an immediate rapport with her which I�m sure helped ensure best effort.

Your son is at an optimal age for IQ testing. I�m sure he will enjoy the challenging games and do quite well!

Thanks for all the help! I love this group!

Just one correction, Trinity: I don't actually expect this one test to answer all my schooling questions. But I still maintain that it IS an important piece of evidence. And we REALLY need more evidence right now!

I am a firm believer that you have to go into testing with specific questions that you are trying to answer. Just wanting to know my child better isn't specific enough for me. We have two basic questions we're trying to answer with the help of this test: 1) Is DS6 eligible for YSP?, and 2) What educational options are going to be better/worse choices for him?

It seems to me that there's a big difference between how you approach the education of a level 2 or 3 GT kid--which is where I THOUGHT he was--and a level 4 or 5 kid--which is where his achievement test scores are leading us. If he's a level 4 or 5, we're probably not going to even try to go back to the public schools with him. I just don't think our local schools (probably level 2 or a low 3) could give him what he needs if he's at level 4-5. If he's a level 2 or 3, then my attitude might be different there. Different set of circumstances entirely.

I guess I'm seeing this test as a sort of tie-breaker between what I thought and what the WJ-III seems to be telling me. We had been assuming that while public school wouldn't always be ideal for DS, he wouldn't require significant differentiation. Then we got his WJ-III scores, and we had no choice but to re-examine our apparently faulty assumptions and do some research into gifted education. I read Dr. Ruf's book for the first time about 6 weeks ago. (That's how new all of this is for us!) The book and his scores showed me that he's at least a level 3, more probably a level 4, and he could well be as high as a level 5 (he doesn't do all of the things that "all level 5s" did, but he did many things several months earlier than the level 4s, and the test scores indicate level 4-5 for sure). Surprise! So at which level is he? And what does that mean for how we approach his education? Thus the "tiebreaker" test!

So that's why I say that I don't think I really need the "you're an expert on your child" talk. I already KNOW that I've been wrong about him and wrong about his needs. I have not been the expert I thought I was. I still had books for 4-year-olds on his shelves, and he was ready to read books for 9-year-olds! (When I bought harder books, he said, "Thanks, mom. I've been needing more of a challenge." Doh!!) We hadn't really been doing any math work with him whatsoever, and he's just as advanced in math as he is verbally. I had no idea! So I'm trying to figure out just how wrong I was, and what does that mean for his education.

What's stressing me out more than anything is the fact that I was so wrong about my child and that our whole plan for the next 11-1/2 years has had to go out the window. Now we need to come up with a new plan. (Albeit one not so far-reaching! We're now taking things one day at a time instead!) I'm actually hoping this test will UNstress me somewhat by telling us more clearly what he's capable of. We could use a little more clarity as we sit down to make decisions about what to do next year.

And if the test gets him in to YSP, with its free educational consulting, so much the better!

Again, thanks for all the words of wisdom, support, concern, help, etc. Even just writing about it here has helped me to feel a little less nervous about this whole process and all the decisions we have to make in DS's future.

Oh, and Dottie, it's good to know that the WJ-III can test high in the early years. Thanks for that bit of insight. If the two tests don't line up, then I'll have a better sense of why. (And I wouldn't be at all surprised if that's what happens!)

That means there's no down side! Either he's profoundly gifted or I wasn't as wrong as I seemed to be. LOL!

Hi Kriston,

I'm sorry you are feeling stressed that you believe you were wrong about your son. I know what you mean, we used to think of our daughters as "the smart one" and "the athletic one" Well, the athletic one is also the highly gifted one. I had no idea, her personality is much different than our first daughter. She was almost 5 when tested and refered to the psychologist as a "buck head" at some point during the testing, so we don't know how seriously she even took the whole process. She still sticks her finger up her nose and thinks it is funny. If we told people she was smart, I'm sure they wouldn't believe it.

Don't sweat it, it happens.
I wish your son a great testing day!

Incongneato

Kriston - Wow what a difference between your two posts! To me this illustrates how important it is to have peers to talk or write to and get a chance to empty out the contents of the "ashtry of isolation" that most of us parent in.

I'm so glad that you wrote both posts. Both are good. I first one is the whirring of a mind that has forgotten it has allies. The second is your own good thinking after remembering that you will never be alone with this again.

You have come so far in 6 weeks - a real sign of your devotion to your child. I wish that every parent was a willing as you are to take a fresh look at their child, gifted or not, and see them again.

Smiles,
Trinity

My husband and I attended a seminar session by Dr. Deborah Ruf this summer.

Her book is definitely on my top five recommendation list for parents of gifted children.

She pointed out that she has met parents whose children have received astronomical numbers on IQ tests, but stated that their children did not meet the developmental milestones for levels four or five gifted. She commented that the high scores is those cases are misleading.

I tend to look at early developmental milestones over the course of years as a slightly more valid indication than a three hour test session. Most schools around here couldn�t care less about either of those, so I believe above level achievement test results are the strongest supporting indicator for academic modification (even these can be artifically low if the child has not been exposed to a higher level education). I have rediscovered through my son�s experiences how some teachers manipulate grading, so I don�t consider straight As the most compelling evidence of intellectual giftedness.