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Hello. My daughter is 3 years and 8 months old. She is potty trained nearly 100%, having the occasional accident. She stays relatively dry at night.

She is resistant to pooping in the potty. She won't even try to use the potty. When I talk to her about it, she tells me "I don't want to talk about it."

I don't know if I should keep reminding her to use the potty or just let it go for a while and hope that she will do it herself eventually.

Thanks for the suggestions.

Sharona

Try bribery. We didn't have this problem with DS4 who trained very early on, but we had to bribe DS6 (he was a few months short of 3). I wrapped a bunch of small presents, put them in a laundry basket and had him choose one every time he pooped in the potty. By the time the basket was empty we didn't need it anymore.

Good luck

Have you checked with the doctor to rule out constipation? Is your daughter very sensory sensitive? Just some ideas.

Hi Sharona,
I think you are finding what I found out about potty training a gifted kid. Some of our kids are very 'strong-willed.'

I would give advice, but the first question is: What are the circumstances involved?

Does she need to be fully trained for some particular reason? Are you worried that she's falling behind on a developmental milestone?
Are you just sick of changing diapers?
Does she know when she is going to have a BM?
Is she wearing a diaper or a pull up most of the day now?
How is she overall with fine and gross motor coordination?
What does the pediatrician say?
Does your daughter notice that her peers are using the potty?
How does she feel about the whole thing?
Is she perfectionist in general?

I do think going through an article on 'OverExcitabilities' or 'sensory sensitive' and identifing which ones she shows is a good idea.

Another useful perspective is www.parentchildhelp.com/
Mary Sheedy Kurcinka, if you haven't already read some of her.

Best Wishes,
Grinity

I did the 3 day method when DD was 22 months and she was trained before I was. I used stickers.

She is now 4 and she likes to be read to while on the toilet to poop. It was how we started and it gives her time to "do her business" compared to when she goes and does a quick pee.

Perhaps you can start a story time also.

Ren

Sharona, I feel your pain with the potty-training issue. I was just on here wallowing in my own potty self-pity not too long ago about DD3-next-month. My DD refuses to use the toilet even though she knows what she's supposed to do. Very strong willed - and that's an understatement. My DD is also a perfectionist about things -- she does not want to do something, even when she's playing, unless she can do it correctly. I think she feels like she cannot properly take down and pull up her pants on her own (which she does struggle with) so she doesn't want to even try doing the potty thing.

Maybe your DD is similar - she feels like she might not get it right the first time so she doesn't even try. Just a thought.

Good luck... my heart goes out to you. Meanwhile, I'm convinced my DD be wearing a pull-up at her Prom.


-Hoosier

Both my GT kids (I'm assuming DD4 is GT anyway) potty trained very late with mucy, much bribing involved. I think it may be harder for a highly sensitive child. I feel your pain! Good luck.

Their all so different, I have DD24 who trained at 13 months, day and night (so many people don't beleive me or say it's not possible, but yes it is) never looked back I was a young mommy and broke so beleive me when she was done with the diapiers we we're done! 18 years later I had my second DD5 who made a broadway production out of going to the bathroom, I'm not kidding she would spend an hour in there, I finally gave her a book and told her let me know when your done. She trained at a little over 2 and still takes forever in the bathroom. DD4 trained a little over 2 as well but with her anything over 5 seconds in the bathroom is too long. She used to run in with her undies to her ankles spend 2 seconds in there and run out pulling the undies up, she didn't want to waste any playtime. She did that for about a year (from 2 to 3 yr old) It was kind of funny when we went to the mall or some public place, she would pull down her pants and start running around trying to find a potty, can't tell you how many times I chased a half naked toddler. Anyway, I think you just have to have a good sense of humor about the whole potty-training thing!