My question is if your child could go through grade school quickly, should you let them? And provide what is needed to do so? And support them doing so?

Once my DD5 started school this year I relized that at the rate she goes through the material she will out grow her school in a couple of years if she continues her drive for learning, it seems like she going faster instead of slowing down. My DH and I purchased some learning material a couple of years ago that have material for each grade up to 4th (it was a sale at Costco) when looking at what her school uses it the same type of thing so it's right on track with what their teaching at the correct grade level, she found them in my office and is now going though each grade. She stated "as soon as I'm done I'll be in 5th grade"

Even if I did nothing she still would go through the material like a force of nature, cause that just the way she is. Do I just let her continue with what she's doing, get a tutor? She'll ask me a question now and then but she mostly does it herself.

What are your thoughts on this subject?
Thanks

DS was like this and certainly could have finished grade school curriculum very quickly. But he liked being in grade school. He enjoys kids his age more than older kids; he likes the activity; he gets on well with the teachers. He has a lot to learn from the "extras": music, PE, art. His teachers have been good about giving him more challenging work when they are able and he is OK with waiting (and entertaining himself in various ways) when the teacher is working at the other kids' pace.

We do lots of fun afterschooling and I feel comfortable that he is learning. One of the things about his not being challenged at school is that he doesn't have much homework and so there is more time to supplement at home.

I think a lot depends on the kid and how they fit with the school they are in. DS has always been enthusiastic about going to school so that has made our decision clear.

Obviously a less enthusiastic kid would require a different approach!

I agree with acs on this one. It's a delicate balance, sometimes hard to navigate.

Been wondering about this myself lately. I'd love to hear thoughts too, all the way around.

Yeah, me too. DD 6 is at the highest level her school will let her go in second grade without skipping again. Seems like we are coming to a decision point. Do we keep skipping or let her enjoy being with peers. (We are leaning toward the latter, but very interested in thoughts too)

Those are some big questions! Like all such things, I think it depends on the kid, what the parents hope for the kid, and what the kid's academic needs are.

I had a kid in K assessed using curriculum based assessments and some subjects indicated the need for 7th grade instruction. I wasn't sending my kid to 7th grade when he was 5. So my answer to "should the kid go at the fastest pace the kid can go" would be no.

There are other ways to provide challenge. We used music, sports, and chess for outlets where my kids can work, struggle, and learn perseverance. But the rest of the time, they get to feel relatively normal. Since they aren't "normal", at least in the GT aspect, I value that experience for them immensely. I may not be able to provide it until 18, but for now, I'm trying hard. They have found places where they fit in as "typical" and that allows them to feel part of a group and get a sense of belonging. I've seen it in neighborhood play gangs, at school recess, in an HG school, and at chess tournaments. I love that for them and cannot imagine it happening after 3 or more grade skips.

I let my kids teach themselves. I haven't had tutors yet. I haven't taught them. I provide resources and let them play with them. That may change as they get older, but it's worked so far. I like that their natural curiosity guides them and I don't have any agenda for them. I make them do other things, but I stay out of learning. I have some ambivalence about this -- sometimes I realize how much faster they could go and wonder if I've "slowed" them down. But my goal for them is to remember being happy and accepted at 5 and 7 and 9, not to finish algebra by 10. They might do that anyway, ;), but I only support it if I think it is in the service of developing the happy, accepted kid. Whether that's true depends so much on the kid and personality, rather than if the kid *can* do algebra by 10.

Following in G3's footsteps, I echo her sentiments. We chose to accelerate, for many reasons at the time, some of which I realize I might one day regret. For example, at the moment...in 6th, DS9 is having some "organizationally challenged" moments, and I can't help but question whether we've done the right thing.

But back to G3's comments, MOST days (when DS's not missing project assignments ), I think we've done the right thing. And he has a good handful of good friends, all who are also quite bright. But he's accelerated 1.5-2.5 years tops. It's officially 2, but with his December birthday, he'd land on the older "half" with his age peers, so some of his grade peers are only 1.5 years older. And he fits with them. On the "pre" side of puberty, he fits really well. I hope I can say the same through puberty, but that remains to be seen. I can say that while he has 7th grade friends, I doubt he'd "fit" as well in that grade overall.

Long story shortened, my point I guess is that we have made some acceleratory decisions, but somewhat "middle of the road". While DS could easily be accelerated much further (he's currently acing an honors class 5 years up), I think his +2 has really taken the edge off the mismatch.

I do NOT want to rush him through school. Not at all! But he didn't fit at all with his age peers, and this for now is working. For us, it's always been about making the best of where we've found ourselves (DS's intelligence and our local situation, not to mention siblings and many other factors).

Oh, and one more post on the tutor front. DS and I are very fortunate in that we both share the math passion. So far, I've been able to "keep up" with him. And at 9 (okay, almost 10) he really enjoys the Mama Time.

However, an opportunity fell into my lap the summer he was 8. I found out an adult male I highly respect from our church was soon to be graduating with a degree in secondary math educuation. The situation literally fell into our laps! I loved having this older "boy" as a mentor for DS for reasons other than just math. And to this day ("mentor" is not a full time teacher in another district), they are still pals. For that summer, we hired "mentor" to work with DS on algebra stuff for an hour a week. No rules, no objectives, just to have fun with algebra. I felt good about paying the price, because to me, "mentor" was still a kid too, .

It had a natural end, but I'd love to find some sort of mentor for math or chess in the future again. It worked really well for us. Other than that, DS's primary "enrichment" is in the form of math. With his aforementioned acceleration, school is "enough" most days, but we still do play with math for fun, just him and me, .

One of the reasons we chose to homeschool instead of fighting the system to try to get them to leapfrog/multiple grade-skip him through public school was so we could try to slow things down for DS7 without boring him. We are able to introduce subjects he'd NEVER get in school, like Arabic and downhill skiing, to broaden his experience and keep him interested without pushing the usual curriculum order.

I think we usually assume that what the schools teach is all that matters, but there's a lot of material out there in all subjects that isn't taught in most schools and is worth learning. Sometimes thinking laterally can provide all that a child needs both in terms of depth and difficulty, but without the rush.

My reasons for wanting to keep DS7 fairly close to his age level (more or less...):

1) He likes sports, but he's not a superstar, so I'd like him to be able to participate at his age-level. It's the best fit.
2) He does reasonably well socially with kids fairly close in age to him--within 0-3 years--and I'm with Dottie that more separation than that seems a bit scary to me.
3) He's deep but not fast, and while he needs a significantly greater complexity of material (3-6 grades beyond age level, depending upon the subject), he also needs greater time to process it. Grade acceleration doesn't seem like a great fit for those specific needs.
4) The thought of college at 12 of 14 brings on massive waves of anxiety. I don't want to do that if I can help it! Slowing him down by "going broad" helps to allay my anxiety. (It's all about me, there!)

I'd have to say, though, that if my only options were to bore my child and go slowly or to rush through elementary school, I'd rush. I don't think the options are truly *that* limited, as acs and G3 have rightly noted. There are ways to afterschool and use extracurriculars to provide some challenge, which is enough for some (not all!) kids. But if we're really locking it down to just those two choices, or if you have a child (like mine) for whom afterschooling and extracurriculars could not possibly make up for 7 hours of solid in-school boredom, then I'd say rush.

FWIW...

For some children, afterschooling and supplementation don't work. If you have one of those, then accelerating through school is not rushing, it is just doing what they have to do. And to some children, being with kids that are three + years older than they are is very normal and not scary. DS11's closest in age friend is three years older and the rest are older than that. He has no friends his own age and quite frankly, if you knew him, you would think it weird if he did! He fit in well with the kids after the gradeskips in school, and while he is home doing 9th and 10th grade this year, the plan is to go back to a bricks and mortar school for his junior year.

We did what we had to do for DS. That included gifted classes, private schools, curriculum compacting, telescoping, gradeskipping and finally a tutor last year when we couldn't meet his needs through school.

Do what you are able to do to meet your daughter's needs. If it isn't working you'll know.

I hope it's true that you daughter 'can't be stopped' but I fear that if she was in an uncomfortable school situation for a year or two, that she could be stopped.

I think that the best thing to do is to watch if each child seems happy and willing to try hard things. To see if the kids in the current grade seem like a better social match than the kids in the next grade up. To try, try, try for subject accelerations on top of the full skip foundation whenever possible. It doesn't have to be a perfect match, just 'good enough.'

Another big difference is the home situation. I think that kids who have siblings or housemates who are also gifted as playmates need a lot less from school and parents. When the siblings provide competition, audience and inspiration for each other, the parents need to provide a lot less. Not so say that some sibling situations aren't really difficult, but I think that when a sibling situation is good, it can be VERY good. Part of what helped me feel normal as a kid was coming home from school and playing board games with my little brothers. Even though they were younger, beating them was a total thrill.

Love and More Love,
Grinity

Yet another example of how this all depends on the kid and the situation. I think, as CFK points out, that for some kids, lots of grade acceleration makes sense and works for the kid. For others, with different home and school options, it makes less sense.

And as Grinity points out, I think siblings matter. I can stay out of learning partly because my kids have similar siblings and can play chess against each other all day, teach each other about books, computer games, even math. If I had an only kid or a kid without similar age siblings, I expect I'd be forced to be more involved. I also think how proactive parents need to be depends on personality, LOG, school options, and available resources. In a regular school, I became one of "those" parents. In an HG school, I'm not doing nothin'!

LOL! And more power to you on that!

I'd go with the personality thing more than the sibs regarding learning. DS13 is an only. He makes friends with everyone but does particularly well with kids his age and their younger siblings. He is always with friends and I hardly see him after school. He just takes care of himself--no siblings needed. And he gets plenty of adult time over meals and at bedtime to fill that need for mature conversation and he doesn't have to compete with siblings for it.

I think for all of our kids, we want them to have a good childhood. For me this means having friends, learning stuff, and playing. Just because a kid can learn at a quick pace doesn't mean that they necessarily should, especially if the learning time interferes with friendships and play. On the other hand, being held back from learning what they want to learn (or are driven to learn) is a serious problem. So is being placed with kids that they can't be friends with. So we each do a balancing act. Are they in a situation where they have real friends (or at least one close friend) regardless of the age difference? Are they able to play in a way that truly makes them happy, even if it doesn't look like play to other parents? Do they have down time and time to explore their interests? Are they learning? Are they learning how to deal with real challenge? The solution to this balancing act will look different for each of us.

So right, acs! Well put! My head was nodding at the screen all through that last paragraph.

I do have a question about GT schools tying back into this topic. I realize that not all schools are a like but I am curious, especially with the above comment, how do schools of this caliber deal with acceleration? Let's say that the situation that started this topic is the same: A 6 yr old gets a hold of the curriculum packets sold on the market and is happily going through all the coursework. Is the curriculum in GT schools broader or more intense? Basically what is the difference and why would by putting your child in a GT school not cause this problem? I would think at some point the students would be in college level work and expecting to get credit and if my calculations are right that would probably be around 7th grade.

I meant to get back to this thread sooner , DD4 is not feeling well.

All of you have such great input and knowledge thank you for your comments on this question.

Now that I'm somewhat through the GT denial, I see the bigger picture of what my daughters can do. I relized that the decessions made in the near future may not be the norm for most parents. I'm not complaining, just trying to process it all.

I also agree with ACS on that last paragraph as well


I think Katelyn'sM om has a point I'm going to look it up I see what type of material I can find.

Thanks again everyone!

Sounds like your daughter is a fit for homeschooling with a personalized curriculum and then maybe insertion to regular school at some point.

If she were in school now, more than likely she would sit in the back of class reading or haunt the library anyway.

You might be able to find a top public school or a private school that will challenge her with acceleration and a challenging curriculum.

Acceleration is not easy - at first, but a kid that will dive in and swim will do well. I enjoyed my accelerations and they were the best school experiences I had.

You should be able to find a GT advocate professional in your area or get an eval from Dr Ruf who can give you more advice and also prepare you for what is ahead.

First -- also agree with acs completely! Love the last paragraph and love my kids roaming around the neighborhood climbing trees. There ought to be plenty of tree-climbing time if a kid wants tree-climbing time!



Interesting questions! I think it depends on the school. Some focus on individualized instruction so that a kid gets to stretch as needed and class sizes are smaller so there's more potential for that to happen. Some focus on breadth with more language and music and specialists more often and team projects. Some offer lots of extras so young kids can do science fair, Lego, chess, spelling bees, geography bees, etc., sometimes during school time. I *hope* it's possible not to be forced to start college at 13, but with a little effort, it shouldn't be that hard. There are a *lot* of things to learn that aren't covered in a regular curriculum, right? I can't imagine anyone thinking hard about this running out of things to teach elementary school kids.

I don't much care about credit. I did a lot of college level work in high school, both officially for credit and unofficially, but it wasn't done for credit, but rather to learn something I couldn't get at high school. I realize there are rules for high school graduation, etc., but I'm not going to worry about such things until I have older kids!

I just enrolled my son in a school where kids don't skip but instead receive an individualized curriculum all the way through from K to 12, and I had this same question. I was told that many of the students do graduate from high school with several years worth of college credit.