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    #223901 - 10/15/15 02:09 AM Re: Gifted adults-what did your parents do right/wrong [Re: SynapticStorm]
    AvoCado Offline
    Member

    Registered: 04/11/13
    Posts: 202
    (Sorry, OT re Dickens!) Thanks for the insights. Not maxed on historical fiction - Little Women, 20000 Leagues, Treasure Island, etc. Just mentioned an interest in Dickens, no idea how she even came across him! She's familiar with the Xmas Carol story as it's adapted a lot, but we actually own Great Expectations, so we'll see. Maybe I'll just read her some excerpts to satisfy her curiosity. Like that ever works smile

    Originally Posted By: SynapticStorm

    * My father explained the value of being typical over exceptional


    Is that a Right?

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    #224018 - 10/16/15 11:55 PM Re: Gifted adults-what did your parents do right/wrong [Re: sweetpeas]
    Aufilia Offline
    Member

    Registered: 02/25/14
    Posts: 336
    Loc: Washington
    Right:

    My parents always acted like there was nothing particularly unusual about us, accepted our interests (even when they were weird-for-age), answered questions, and provided a generally intellectually stimulating environment without us really noticing it being unusually intellectual (perhaps because their adult friends also gifted adults with smart kids who were also mostly a few years older than us).

    I wouldn't say I thought particularly much about being gifted though I was sent off to a gifted public school in 2nd grade, and was certainly aware of why I was sent to that school. I don't think any kind of big deal was ever made about this at home.

    Cons:

    Because we moved several times, I was the only kid in the family to have gifted services before the 4th grade. And I don't remember it being particularly challenging even then, though I loved the class.

    Little to no help applying to and selecting an appropriate college -- I was certainly capable of getting all the paperwork 'n' stuff done on my own, but some parental wisdom in choosing the right college would've done wonders.

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    #224038 - 10/17/15 02:51 PM Re: Gifted adults-what did your parents do right/wrong [Re: sweetpeas]
    Mana Offline
    Member

    Registered: 12/17/12
    Posts: 882
    My parents have been unsupportive of my interests all my life but the flip side of that coin is that they left me to do whatever I wanted.

    I don't think I am making the same mistakes as my parents did but I do wonder if I'm making the opposite mistakes. I think I am getting too involved and need to give DD some space to grow on her own.

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    #224371 - 10/23/15 01:06 PM Re: Gifted adults-what did your parents do right/wrong [Re: sweetpeas]
    _Angie_ Offline
    Member

    Registered: 03/18/14
    Posts: 146
    What an interesting thread! I think about these things too... for context I think my IQ was tested in the mid 140s, I'm not entirely sure.

    Not so great:

    My mom told me several times "I just don't understand you." That really didn't help with my insecurities.

    My parents thought I was just lazy when I just couldn't seem to get my stuff together. It was a high school teacher my freshman year that finally helped me turn things around. Every day he told me I was a good student. smile I became one.

    My dad made me feel like a complete antisocial weirdo when I found my passion in high school and started teaching myself programming. They took away my computer. Crazy thing? My dad is a software engineer. He should have understood my love of it. Today I'm a successful software engineer and I can code WHENEVER I WANT. wink

    I was depressed in junior high and basically spaced out for 2 years of my life. Why in the world did my parents not get me help?

    The great:

    Library reading clubs, gymnastics, swimming, art classes, summer gifted camps... From about 4th grade on (when I started in a self contained gifted class at school) I really felt supported to learn and try whatever I wanted. I wouldn't say it was always hard enough for me but it was close enough that I really enjoyed it. And, I had a peer group of gifted kids. So great!

    My dad explained everything in the world in terms of physics and math. He loved to make those concepts accessible to kids. I wish I could do that! It was amazing. We traveled all over the US on summer vacation and there was always physics. Grand canyon? Physics. wink

    My dad and I would sit and do math puzzles together. smile It was kind of our time. I have some great memories from that time.

    I was a twin and my sister did not test gifted. They managed to meet both of our needs without making us feel bad about it either way. My twin got better grades than me until college.


    I don't see myself approaching parenting in a hugely different way. The only thing I really try to change is understanding and empathizing with my son more. I know that despite being gifted he still has his own stuff he needs to work through and handle. I get that gifted doesn't automatically equal easy success. I'm not sure my mom ever knew what to do with a gifted kid that didn't get good grades until high school!

    Also, my 5 year old already thinks through logic better than most adults. If that kid wants to develop software, I will teach him myself. Currently he's enjoying an airplane obsession though.

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    #249133 - 08/25/21 04:21 AM Re: Gifted adults-what did your parents do right/wrong [Re: sweetpeas]
    GiftedOne Offline
    Junior Member

    Registered: 08/21/21
    Posts: 5
    You did an easy major and/or went to a easy college/university. That's how you got highest honors. Is that correct? Someone correct me if I'm incorrect.

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