Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Some Updates

LOL KaT,
I think you should call the school and read to them what you wrote to us - Right Now. Then let us know what they said! Who to call? Can you reach the psychologist who sat down with you? Someone from the highly gifted program?

This isn't a character issue, this is a "fit" problem. Get it straightend out now (I mean the teacher not your kid) before it becomes one, ok?

Smile and Wink,
Trin

Texas Summer,
See if you can get a hold of the standardised test for older kids and use them. The parent's shouldn't have to pay for the IQ test routienly. Figure out the content of the program first, and the identification route will follow - don't let the tail wag the dog.
Trinity

DS11 has just figured out that if we time him on the easy stuff, it really helps him. He'll say "I bet I can get this done in 3 minutes" and then one of us sets the timer and he sees if he can "beat the clock." I think this helps him feel that this task is finite and the added challenge makes it fun. I will tell you that he discovered this himself. Not sure if it would work if imposed from the outside..

Anne

His teacher told us the story about my son's "leadership role" while we were at the meeting, and everyone else laughed (?!) while I groaned. Don't know why?! Maybe they thought it was cute that he "has a system all worked out" and didn't think it a problem?! I knew something was up (funny how we know our kids soo well) when he brought home a leprechaun cutout and it was done so neatly, and the coloring was all even and not outside the lines, and I said, "Wow, this looks great, did you do this?", and he hesitated before saying, "Yes, but a few people helped out." I didn't think anything of it till a few days later we all met for the HG meeting and his teacher recounted some of his activities for us.

Anne - his teacher already tried the "beat the clock" timer approach, and it worked for awhile, but still a hit or miss, he does stuff (or rather doesn't do them) when he feels like it. It takes him hours to complete a coloring or tracing or scissors assignment in class that would take the other children 10 minutes to finish.

I call that "leadership role", the "Tom Sawyer Syndrome". Rite (15), STILL does this both at school and in the neighborhood. Just last night he here at home he was supposed to do his chores, plus cut some b/s chicken thighs into bite size pieces for me to cook for supper when I got home.

When I arrived home, he had 4 neighborhood kids (ages 17, 14, 13 and 12) and Mite doing the chores and chicken cutting while he was on the phone arranging for other kids in the neighborhood to come down for a soccer game when they all got done.

don't you wish you had that talent??

I do recommend to intervene on this early on, though. Rite has gotten into trouble with teachers and with neighbors because of this tendency. Plus, while I think he has honed the skill to an art, I worry he doesn't take on the role of plebe to well and I think that is going to hurt him when he gets in more competitive environments.

I often call to Rite and his friends (who are aware of his manipulating but adore him and do it so what ever plans he has can come to fruition for them all), "No Tom Sawyering you guys! Rite's gotta do this one himself"!

Goodness, yeah.. I have same worries too and was surprised when those in the meeting seemed to just laugh it off. Thanks for sharing your experiences!

Willa Gayle,
Rite�s Tom Sawyering is a riot! He must be very charming!

Kat,
My son is the same way with the mundane stuff!!! He�ll dive right into a research project but will complete boring worksheets very slowly. Part of it is that he actually puts thought into his answers (I�m trying to break him of this) and part of it is that he daydreams. He seems to work more quickly at home though. Maybe because he knows there is a payoff for finishing; not just more of the same.

Trinity is right about it being an issue of �fit�. He still has a difficult time with the mindless worksheets that seem to be never ending even in 5th grade. Sixth grade will be better, but I am worried about subjects taught by one teacher who ties real artistic requirements to every academic subject. My son is not an excellent artist and I am concerned that his grades in history and science will be depressed because he has a tendency to create artwork with thick, dark markers (rather than sketches colored in with colored pencil like his sister).

Is anyone else experiencing random censoring of their posts?


Thanks Mark!

Yes! I've had to delete/rewrite/reword posts to get rid of it.. and it does seem pretty random...

So what do we do about getting them to focus and COMPLETE these mundane tasks (the whole world and getting through each day will not always be one big math problem to solve, they have to learn to get through the simplest of tasks without overthinking or overcomplicating things)?

The short answer is to emphasize delayed gratification, the long answer is;

We don�t believe he has met many of his intellectual peers yet, so we remind him that he has to continue to put in his best effort to get to the next level. We believe that his marks will improve as he moves up in grade and also think he needs to get into a high school that has higher than average academic criteria for admittance. This should minimize the occurrence of busywork.

In the meantime, we tell him the truth and validate many of his impressions. He knows that we believe him regarding issues at school and do what we can for him. He knows we have limited influence regarding his school day, yet we continually advocate for him.

We hope that he will end up in his chosen profession where he will most likely be surrounded by others who endured similar educational experiences. If he can maintain his best effort in the meantime, he is more likely to end up where he wants with a career in physics and aviation and less likely to have to endure the mundane on a continual basis.