Gifted Bulletin Board

Welcome to the Gifted Issues Discussion Forum.

We invite you to share your experiences and to post information about advocacy, research and other gifted education issues on this free public discussion forum.
CLICK HERE to Log In. Click here for the Board Rules.

Links


Learn about Davidson Academy Online - for profoundly gifted students living anywhere in the U.S. & Canada.

The Davidson Institute is a national nonprofit dedicated to supporting profoundly gifted students through the following programs:

  • Fellows Scholarship
  • Young Scholars
  • Davidson Academy
  • THINK Summer Institute

  • Subscribe to the Davidson Institute's eNews-Update Newsletter >

    Free Gifted Resources & Guides >

    Who's Online Now
    0 members (), 600 guests, and 19 robots.
    Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
    Newest Members
    parentologyco, Smartlady60, petercgeelan, eterpstra, Valib90
    11,410 Registered Users
    March
    S M T W T F S
    1 2
    3 4 5 6 7 8 9
    10 11 12 13 14 15 16
    17 18 19 20 21 22 23
    24 25 26 27 28 29 30
    31
    Previous Thread
    Next Thread
    Print Thread
    Page 1 of 2 1 2
    #241240 02/08/18 07:23 PM
    Joined: Feb 2018
    Posts: 1
    Q
    New Member
    OP Offline
    New Member
    Q
    Joined: Feb 2018
    Posts: 1
    People think that gifted people have something to be jealous about and that their lives would be so much better if they were gifted. I know it has its benefits, but there are also lots of struggles that come along the way. I just wanted to start this topic for people to share sturuggles and to know that they are not alone. I�ll share one... I cannot stop messing around in math because I get bored because I already know the math.

    Last edited by Mark D.; 04/06/18 11:31 AM.
    Joined: Oct 2011
    Posts: 2,856
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    Joined: Oct 2011
    Posts: 2,856
    My DD13 can identify.

    Her biggest struggle comes because she's formally identified as gifted but often in mixed classrooms - students (and one teacher she had for two years) making fun of her when she makes a mistake because she's supposed to be the smart one.

    Joined: Mar 2012
    Posts: 639
    A
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    A
    Joined: Mar 2012
    Posts: 639
    The biggest struggle comes from being lonely in a crowd for my DS. He is an extreme extrovert but struggles to find commonality with the other kids around him who have no interest whatsoever in anything he has pursued in-depth. He knows that he is different, and knows that he can connect with the popular kids with sports, so he gravitates towards more sports than he actually wants to do, just to be around some friends. And he spends a lot of his life "blending in" and not "standing out".

    Joined: May 2012
    Posts: 235
    N
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    N
    Joined: May 2012
    Posts: 235
    Our daughter is somewhat a version of Sheldon Cooper from TBBT. Not as oblivious as he is but at times not having the most "common sense". Although in defense of her others kids in the gifted program were much worse than her.

    Joined: Sep 2007
    Posts: 3,296
    Val Offline
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    Joined: Sep 2007
    Posts: 3,296
    Another perspective: giftedness actually is something to envy.

    Sure, it comes with struggles, but nothing in life is pure benefit, with the possible exception of being tetrachromatic. I can't think of a downside to seeing extra colors, though this could be a failure of my imagination.

    Over the years, I've met a lot of people who get downright whiny about how hard it is to be intelligent, and I think, "Would you rather have struggled to understand basic arithmetic or Intro to Business Studies? Would you prefer that your career options be limited at birth to basic manual labor? Would you rather...?"

    I agree that people can be mean, and it's not right to pick on someone over something they were born with. But everyone is susceptible to this problem. Who gets picked on depends on the environment at a given time. The trick is to understand this fact and try to work with it.

    Similarly, the bias problem is exacerbated when people put themselves into little groups and don't see that mistreatment against their group has the same roots as mistreatment of another group. Prejudices harm everyone. Belittling someone over intelligence has the same roots as belittling people over the music they like or where their parents came from or [insert anything innate here]. So there is nothing special about being mistreated because you're smart, but there is something very special about being smart.

    Use your intellect to do something magnificent, whether it's finding a new way to increase energy efficiency in a building, or getting the PTA organized so it gets meaningful stuff done, or figuring out how gravity and quantum mechanics are connected. Only smart people can do those things, and being one of them is a privilege!




    Joined: Apr 2014
    Posts: 4,047
    A
    aeh Offline
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    A
    Joined: Apr 2014
    Posts: 4,047
    My perspective: struggle is inherent to the human condition...but so are joy, beauty, growth, transformation, compassion...none of these are restricted to GT or non-GT individuals.

    I have had many, many students, some GT, others disabled, a few both, who have privately expressed the same sense of isolation, difference, and rejection, going back for years, but who then found their people in our nontraditional secondary setting, and were able both to experience the relief of being accepted and understood, and to turn their struggles into compassion for others on the margins.

    This is a story I have now heard so many hundreds of times that I have concluded that it is the perception that everyone else fits in easily that is the misconception. We know our own stories, and the tears others do not see, but others have their own hidden pain, as well. Our own struggles are a pathway to empathy for others'.


    ...pronounced like the long vowel and first letter of the alphabet...
    Joined: Jun 2015
    Posts: 132
    L
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    L
    Joined: Jun 2015
    Posts: 132
    Beautifully put, aeh smile

    Joined: Mar 2017
    Posts: 42
    T
    Junior Member
    Offline
    Junior Member
    T
    Joined: Mar 2017
    Posts: 42
    I have one child who thrives on learning and being one of the brightest in his group, but another who hates feeling singled out. So she hides her intelligence, and tries to convince her teachers that she doesn't know answers. I wish I could find a way to help her be more comfortable in her own skin like her brother, but unfortunately she is just so embarrassed about not being "average". It's painful to watch:(

    Joined: Mar 2013
    Posts: 1,453
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    Joined: Mar 2013
    Posts: 1,453
    IMO, the pressure to conform, i.e. act NT is far more intense among girls (based on a sample of 1 admittedly). YMMV

    Last edited by madeinuk; 04/03/18 04:43 PM.

    Become what you are
    Joined: Oct 2012
    Posts: 71
    O
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    O
    Joined: Oct 2012
    Posts: 71

    For my DS13 8th grader, he struggles with trying to fit in since few "get" him including his teachers, a task that is made all the more difficult by the fact he is about 5ft 11, maybe 105 lbs. soaking wet, and has facial hair that he hates but that he does not want to shave until school is out for the year so that "no one makes a big deal about it". And yikes, he won't be 14 until mid-August.

    Middle school....ick.

    AEH- That made me tear up. Thank you. And Val, I will convey your message to my DS.

    Page 1 of 2 1 2

    Moderated by  M-Moderator 

    Link Copied to Clipboard
    Recent Posts
    Testing with accommodations
    by aeh - 03/27/24 01:58 PM
    Quotations that resonate with gifted people
    by indigo - 03/27/24 12:38 PM
    For those interested in astronomy, eclipses...
    by indigo - 03/23/24 06:11 PM
    California Tries to Close the Gap in Math
    by thx1138 - 03/22/24 03:43 AM
    Gifted kids in Illinois. Recommendations?
    by indigo - 03/20/24 05:41 AM
    Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5