Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Age or Ability Specific Forums Pre-school screen time/following his lead?

I just came across this thread and thought I'd update. So much for this being a "burning out" passion - 8 months later and he's still going strong and still improving rapidly. He now plays at the level of a skilled adult. He has recruited several adult family members to play with him (which is kind of a fun thing to be able to do with long-distance family members!), and he is a really tough opponent. I now consider myself lucky if I can win half of my games with him. I looked at his game-collected stats the other day, and he has now beaten more than 130 unique opponents and played over 7,000 unique words! It's been quite amazing to see how rapidly his skills have grown.

In terms of my original concern about screen time, we've settled into some routines around when he is allowed to play that allow us to be comfortable that he's not spending too much time on it.

Here's a book about screen time that may be of interest:

Glow Kids: How screen addition is hijacking our kids - and how to break the trance
by Nicholas Kardaras
Copyright 2016

Had a major clash with DD12 about this on Monday.

School has been hard socially and so coming home she has been ruminating and reliving the traumas of not really fitting in every evening afterwards. She would procrastinate and have enormous difficulty in foccussing. Her distraction would be the internet - mindless pap almost every bit of it.

She was really rude to her mother Monday night - this had been festering for weeks - hours of screaming, hair pulling and crying later she was able to talk calmly about everything.

We suspended her screen time privileges. What a difference - a week AoPS alg ii bookworm plus online problems including the written one done in <5 hours!

Still wondering how to reintroduce screen time...

Allow half an hour per day for a week or two, then check results. Adjust upward to an hour if no issues, and revert to 30 mins/day if any adverse effects surface. Screen time is a privilege that has to be earned through good behaviour. Glad you addressed the issue head-on.

Not to be indelicate, but a spurt of overemotional drama from a DD12 may be related to not just to screen time, but possibly also to gender-specific monthly hormonal fluctuations, which in turn can be impacted by the daily dietary intake and exercise. Unfortunately, moms may suffer the brunt of DD12s' hormonal-induced tension. My thought would be to tuck this idea away in the back of your mind and see if a calendar pattern emerges... then consider being prepared to offer a bit of pampering for 2 or 3 days if needed... taking a walk together, reading to her, bringing her a pillow, having on hand a few of her favorite comfort foods. Eventually help DD12 to see that you have prepared in advance to support her through these fluctuations, and help her to see how she can play a role in this (for example, helping to grocery shop for favorite comfort foods). With this support and understanding she may quickly learn to anticipate the monthly fluctuations and manage them with grace and aplomb.

Wrt 'gender specific hormonal changes' I think it may be a contributor but the main issue according to what a psychiatrist friend told me which was further backed up by Untangled is that the brain undergoes some major renovation work during this period in her life.

This reorg literally goes from the ground up - starting with the Amygdala (emotional control unit) and moves up and forward culminating in the frontal cortex in the early twenties.

I am far from politically correct (preferring a rational explanation over a feel good one every time) and I will admit that my first reaction had been 'hormones' but I think that the brain reorg is backed by hard empirical science and is a better fitting explanation.

I totally agree that if there is not a repeating monthly pattern (which can generally be influenced/improved by dietary and exercise choices), then the described behavior may be related to adolescent changes which affect both genders.

For anyone looking for more information, here is one source: Maturation of the adolescent brain, by National Center for Biotechnology Information (NCBI), National Library of Medicine (NLM), National Institutes of Health (NIH).

My main point was that while screen time may be a trigger, there may be underlying factors: screen time may not be the root cause of the behavior.