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    #240139 10/17/17 08:28 AM
    Joined: Apr 2017
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    DS7 recently participated in a school musical that contained a song about ladybugs with the following lyrics:

    If someone treats you rough
    And life is kind of tough
    You think you’ve had enough but be a lady

    If someone isn’t kind
    And friends are hard to find
    You just say never mind and be a lady

    If someone isn’t nice
    Their heart’s as cold as ice
    Well just take my advice and be a lady

    When someone hurts your pride
    You’d like to run and hide
    You just keep dignified and be a lady

    When all you see are dots
    Complexion’s full of spots
    Remember all you’ve got and be a lady

    When all your friends have fled
    And all you see is red
    Just keep a level head and be a lady

    I find these lyrics problematic in any climate but on the heels of the Harvey Weinstein scandal they seem particularly inappropriate. Is this what we want to teach our young people? To remain silent and "dignified" in the face of injustice?

    I am struggling with how to address this, as I am gearing up to advocate for a partial homeschool scenario for my PG son. Should I let it go and focus on advocacy?

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    Joined: Nov 2012
    Posts: 2,513
    Define "lady" how you wish. For me, a lady radiates strength, self-assurance, wisdom. In that light, I interpret the lyrics as an acknowledgement that external circumstances don't define the woman, the woman defines her circumstances. The world can crumble around her, and she's still a rock thanks to her character and innate value.

    ETA: As someone who shares your overarching view, it might be worth a conversation with the school. How is the school interpreting the lyrics?


    What is to give light must endure burning.
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    I can see two things that can be done here which do not put you directly in the firing line, and should therefore be actions you can take which would not necessarily interfere with your advocacy for DS:

    1) Use it as a teachable moment to DS. In age-and-maturity-appropriate terms, explain what the lyrics mean to you, and why you feel them to be problematic.

    2) Reach out to other parents and ask them if they're okay with this. With any luck, someone else will reach the appropriate level of outrage, rally the troops, and lead the fight. This really should be a multi-parent effort anyway. They shouldn't be hearing it from just one.

    And if you get the general sense that nobody wants to do anything about it, that tells you something about the community culture, likely to be shared by the school staff, and you'd be unlikely to have any success advocating against this. In that case, you'd be smart to choose the battle that is most important to you: DS.

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    I agree with your concern, but given you have another situation on hand that is, frankly, far more pressing, I would not fight this one now.

    Dude has a good approach. Use it as a learning opportunity for your child and if there are other parents with whom you are friendly, bring it up.


    Moderated by  M-Moderator, Mark D. 

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