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    #236058 01/24/17 06:56 AM
    Joined: Feb 2014
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    DD11's psych.is not so sure DD should be diagnosed with ADHD inattentive type despite another psych's diagnosis and the fact that DD is in la la land at home. Psych feels that too many kids get diagnosed with ADHD when it might be giftedness, anxiety, etc.(which defines DD). DD has been doing pretty darn well at school with turning in papers and projects and is getting straight A's. Now, I was hassling her to fill out her agenda and leaning on her to have the backpack ready so I figured that was keeping her in line. It was sure not fun for me to keep on her(big understatement).

    About 2 months ago we decided to do an experiment at the urging of the psych. We totally backed off. DD was allowed to be completely responsible for turning in her work. We do have a chore chart on the wall which she turns to for direction in what she needs to do to get ready for school. Results - she has brought home her lunchbox every day. She turned 1 project in a day late and was docked 10 points. She misplaced 2 pieces of paper and then found them that night. I believe she turned in another document one day late. This equals 3 items in 2 months. The psych says for an 11 year old in 7th grade that's just a typical kid.

    Is she just growing up? Keeping it together at school and then relaxing at home into total inattention?

    greenlotus #236061 01/24/17 08:19 AM
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    Kudos to your DD11 for her newfound organizational skills! I'm so proud of her. smile She owns this! smile Internal locus of control.

    Sometimes it's hard for parents to step back and just appreciate the child who doesn't need them so much anymore... and begin to develop a different kind of relationship with them.

    Originally Posted by greenlotus
    Keeping it together at school and then relaxing at home into total inattention?
    Yes, it could be that, like many kids, she finds home to be her "soft place to land", unwind, de-stress, and process thoughts from her day.

    On the other hand, your mention of la-la land and anxiety cause me to wonder: Is it possible that parenting style might be a contributing factor to any anxiety... and that DD11 copes by somewhat tuning out around you? Possibly it is time for the relationship to evolve a bit... each day, finding more things to compliment than to correct?


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