Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional Compulsive Reader - Odd Behavior

My husband would say you've described me to a T - at least until a pair of high-maintenance babies seriously curtailed my reading during their waking hours (which was pretty much all of them, ugh). In my younger days, I was never without a book in hand or pocket, whether at school, walking down the street, or (definitely, and still) brushing my teeth. I would suspect compulsive reading suggests there's nothing happening in the real world that's remotely as interesting as what's going on in the books. Which is not inherently a problem, in my highly biased view .

But there's a difference between finding books really interesting, and finding the real world utterly intolerable. If your son prefer books to un-engaging and unrewarding work, or resists sudden interruptions when deep in a story, well, who can blame him? As long as he can also happily put the books down to engage with those people or activities he does enjoy.

But if he wants to avoid the real world under any circumstances, that suggests there's things going on out there he can't deal with, and you need to figure out what they so you can help him learn to interact, navigate and cope. Is he finding social interactions a negative experience? Experiencing sensory overload? Is there something "out there" that doesn't feel safe? Is it possible there's a processing deficit that's causing some sensory intake (such as visual or auditory) to be providing wrong information, so he doesn't trust one his senses and is therefore avoiding relying on it?

For my own younger self, there were no extra Es (that I can quite pin down, at least!). Just a kid with little in common with her peers, poor social skills, utterly unengaged at school and with limited imagination - so whenever I was bored, I lived in my books. (random note: An odd thread last year about aphantasia - the inability to picture things in one's head - made me realize that's me. Perhaps a contributor to always seeking external stimulus of books over internal thoughts?) I guess it comes back to - does he prefer a book over boring things, or over all things?

Thank you Platypus101, puffin, blackcat and polarbear - great insights all around.

Yes, he is a social boy - at least one on one. He loves adults, younger kids and some peers. He's played on sports teams and will happily play sports. He doesn't like big crowds or noise and likely has sensory issues (that's a separate post).

He seems to need his book when he is in sensory overload as Platypus101 mentioned. As soon as I pick him up from school he buries his head in a book to relax from the school day. Same thing after a party.

I should also mention that hie is a single topic boy. He reads one subject exhaustively before moving on or deviating. Now it is sports. In the past it was history and geography.

I think he may have 2E issues but from what everyone here has said odd reading behavior is not in itself enough a problem.

Just a few more thoughts for you -


FWIW, my dd with vision challenges also didn't like big crowds and was extremely sensitive to noise. In some ways, I think the visual challenges led to uber-development of both her hearing and sense of smell. She is still extremely sensitive to odors, but was able to deal with large crowds once we had her vision challenges remediated. She also appeared to be a highly sensory challenged child when she was young, pre-vision diagnosis. Much of the sensory behavior was also tied back to vision.


Rather than the reading, the need to escape/cool down/etc is a red flag (just my perspective)... many kids are tired at the end of the school day, but most kids don't need to "relax" when they come home from school at the end of the day. My 2e ds had a similar mode of operation (but different type of escape) when I picked him up from elementary school prior to his diagnosis and getting appropriate accommodations in place.

Best wishes,

polarbear

I can see where you're coming from, polarbear, and I guess it depends on whether this is a particular reaction to school, or a more general reaction. My DD is a textbook introvert and noise sensitive. A day in a noisy classroom sucks the life out of her, and she most definitely needs to find a quiet place to hide and re-energize after most days of school.

But she's been this way since a baby. She really enjoys people, but can only take so much noise and interaction before she needs to retreat. From the time she could make her needs known, when the house was full, there would always be a point at which she'd take my hand and pull me off into a quiet room somewhere to snuggle up and quietly read to her. When re-charged, she'd re-join. Those quiet spaces are essential to her. Ask her first thing on a Saturday morning if she wants to find friends, the answer will always be no. But ask at noon, and she's raring to go. She's recovered from the week at school by then.

I am not an introvert of this kind, and it has taken me a long time to understand that DH and DD need to be allowed to disappear in the middle of company sometimes, that it's not rude, it's just essential to their sanity. So if you think there's something about school or certain environments that is now shutting your son down in an unusual way, that should be pursued. But if that need for quiet breaks has always been there, that need to recuperate between exposures to loud crowded places, then I would see the retreat as pretty normal. It sounds like your son spends lots of time enjoying other people and activities, in addition to his reading. As long as there is balance, and he seems happy in both, he is probably finding the way of navigating the world that works for him.

Thank you Platypus101 and Polarbear. I do think he sounds like your daughter Platypus101. Can be social when he is in the mood but definitely needs quiet retreats from school, large crowds or extended play time.

When I pick him up from school his brain needs to unwind. He really can't talk for 15-20 minuets or so. I can't ask him about his day. I give him that time to relax and decompress and wait for him to rejoin us.