Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional Please help, I'm in tears with frustration

So my ds8 is twice exceptional, with ADHD, asp, and exceptionally gifted. He scored very high on the Scat for 2nd graders as well as wisc iv. He has a very high reading level and comprehension, loves reading any chance he gets, and excels at high levels of math and spatial concepts.

He attends a public school and they have a GT program that only allows kids entrance if they score high enough on the cogat exam, have excellent communicative skills, is an excellent quality producer, and excellent self directed learner, as well as have excellent teacher ratings. For the last three years, he has always scored high enough academically to get into the gt program but could never score in the excellent range for the other aspects they also consider as the three ring concept of giftedness.

We spoke to the school about having an I.E.P for my son because of asp, ADHD, and they said that he doesn't qualify because he isn't doing poorly at school and can keep up fine. But we keep telling the school that he is just compensating because he is highly intelligent. But he does have social issues, very poor handwriting, concentration problems, and behavioral issues. The school says he can't be in both special education and gifted program because they are just the opposite. Their recommendation is to just work with him at home.

I am so frustrated I'm at my wits end. I do work with him at home but there has to be more the school can do otherwise he will always hit this road block of high potential but mediocre achievement. And the thing that is most frustrating is if he had just giftedness, or just learning issues then he could be in these individualized programs. But because he is twice exceptional he can't be in either one of them?!!?

I have also asked about subject acceleration and they said they don't accommodate that and I asked about grade acceleration and they said he isn't getting perfect grades and he has social issues. They said for example he knows the math and language arts concepts but isn't writing down the explanations in full detail and clearly conveying the written concepts. But I keep telling them that's because many aspie kids have poor written output! You see my frustration now?

I am so sorry for your situation. It sounds as though the school is so rigid and uninformed. It also sounds as though the program is aimed at high-performers, not necessarily highly gifted children.

Is there any other school choice in your area?

You could try sharing some info found here:

http://www.wrightslaw.com/info/2e.index.htm

I'm sorry for your frustration. It's rough when you don't feel the school cares about supporting your child.

that seems like a fundamental understanding of what gifted kids often really need! Im so sorry!

How frustrating! Have they never heard of a 2e child??? The school is in need of some serious education.

I think it is time to consider getting a lawyer involved, at a very minimum, to make certain that the school isn't ignoring his struggles. Even if your state does not require that anything be done for gifted students, most states do require that schools help students who struggle.

I'm so sorry your child's school is being so difficult. I'm frustrated just reading your post.

My child has an IEP and has always done very well in school. So NO a child does not have to be doing poorly to get either an IEP or a 504!

I sounds like your child's school may be misinformed as to the law. Eco2168 beat me to the information on wrightslaw. This blog post explains some of what wrightslaw has and is an easy read. http://makingschoolwork.com/finally-some-good-news-for-gifted-and-disabled-2/

see also: http://www.nagc.org/sites/default/f...s%20Receive%20Appropriate%20Services.pdf

Your child's school needs to conduct a comprehensive evaluation of your child (they will want to do as limited of an evaluation as possible but don't let them). I'd focus on getting the IEP in place first. After the IEP and accommodations are in place, I'd then focus on the acceleration.

If the school isn't willing to work with you. You may need to find an attorney who specializes in Special Education Law. Or at least a special education advocate.

That's the thing, the school is saying yes he has struggles but it's not enough to warrant an IEP, just more encouragement needed. We tried to go the route of competitive private schools, but he didn't get accepted because his grades aren't high enough and he has social and behavior problems. We didn't consider other expensive less competitive private schools because of the cost.

There aren't really any other options of public school choices where we live. I do supplemental enrichment work with him at home, but I feel this is not enough. I'm planning on applying him for DYS later this month. Do you think their gifted counselors would have an effective way of helping to advocate his situation? His neuropsychologist is trying as well but the school seems not to bend. I wonder if contacting the school district board would help? I really don't want to get a lawyer involved, due to cost and undue exposure for my son. But it is something to consider in the future. I have read the articles on Wright's law, and FAPE, but it is subjective on what "appropriate" means.

Also, regarding the three ring concept of giftedness, does anyone else's school district have such a thing? Because I don't really understand why being a good communicator, quality producer, or self directed learner really has anything to do with giftedness, that seems more like achievement than cognitive ability.

I ran into a similar situation with our ds10. He is 2e. He had an IEP from 0-5 and in special education due to being born with physical issues but then scored in the 99% in achievement tests when he was 6.5 yrs old. Public school wanted to keep him in special education but then I withdrew ds and put him in a private gifted school - which couldn't accommodate the special needs. I then got him re-tested with the public schools who recognized he was 2e but was told that they would do absolutely nothing because there was no state mandate for giftedness and my ds no longer qualified for or warranted special education or an IEP though he still had special needs (and still does) - which the public school recognized. So I've been homeschooling since he was 6.5 yrs old.

Many other parents find themselves in this situation with 2e kids since there are not many schools who can (or are willing) to accommodate 2e kids, especially when they're hg, eg, or pg. Many parents end up homeschooling as a result, mainly out of default from dealing with the public schools over it.

Try to exhaust all your options, even so crazy ones perhaps. Try to work with the public school in your area first. Then, see what's around or alternative options for private - or alternative public school options. IS school choice an option at neighboring school districts? IS it possible to move, for instance? After that point, you'll have to re-assess the situation. A lot of this is going to depend on where you live and how flexible or accommodating (or not) your public school will be and how much time, energy, and patience you may have. Perhaps your state or area has a Dept of Ed that deals with this sort of thing or an ombudsman that may help? Our state did not. DYS wouldn't have made any difference either with our state.

I had a 2e expert advise me that the choices are: public school, private school, and then homeschooling. After exhausting both the public school and private school options in our area/state, I was left with the third option - homeschooling. I'd say it's the least-worst case situation. It's better than public or private at the moment. It doesn't necessarily mean that in time things won't change. Nothing is etched in stone and most decisions are subject to change. Yes, it's not something I had planned or necessarily wanted, but then I didn't bargain on having a 2e child either and well, what can you do? There are limits in life.

Sounds exactly like our school district. They only want high achieving, "tow the line" kinda kids. We, like cdfox, ended up pulling our twins out of public and homeschooling. Our twins were not failing enough for public school to do something but failing enough not to get in the couple of gifted private schools in our area. That being said, I have seen my kids do a 180 in motivation and stress levels.

Our district refused to write an IEP because DD was not "failing", but she was not writing more than 2-3 sentences in class. When they do standardized testing, it is always for reading/math and she does great on those tests. They hyperfocused on her math/reading scores and didn't seem to care that she was barely writing anything in class. I asked for an eval and the longest writing piece (and only writing piece) they looked at was 2 sentences long, vs. almost every other student writing more. They computed a range of scores with my DD near the bottom. They claimed "She is in the range, therefore services aren't warranted". (What?!).

I dug up all the State manuals for various disability categories, like specific learning disorder (written expression) and Other Health Disability (ADHD). There was nothing in there about a student needing to be failing. For the SLD category, she had the large discrepancy between cognitive ability and achievement. However, her writing score on the WJ was NOT below average, because she was able to use cognitive ability to compensate on some parts of the test, putting her composite in the average range. Since her classroom writing was clearly impaired, she should have been able to easily qualify for an IEP in either category, but the school insisted she has to have below average test scores. To say this was frustrating was an understatement. All that the law says is that a students educational performance or achievement has to be impacted compared to typical peers, at least to qualify for the ADHD. But the school took a very rigid approach, equating achievement or performance to mean "below average range on tests". Classroom work didn't really matter to them.

We ended up switching schools and they classified her as Other Health Disability for ADHD. That category is more flexible than others.

So my suggestion is to look up manuals, eligibility checklists, etc. from your State. You can try calling the State Dept. of Ed and talk to someone in special ed compliance. Also, put in a written request for a comprehensive eval. If they fight you they have to go through a formal process. Also, make sure they have any outside neuropsych evals and ask the neuropsych to recommend an IEP in the report. The school has to consider outside evals. If they refuse, you can go through the formal process to fight them (like due process), but you need things in writing going back and forth.