Gifted Bulletin Board

Welcome to the Gifted Issues Discussion Forum.

We invite you to share your experiences and to post information about advocacy, research and other gifted education issues on this free public discussion forum.
CLICK HERE to Log In. Click here for the Board Rules.

Links


Learn about Davidson Academy Online - for profoundly gifted students living anywhere in the U.S. & Canada.

The Davidson Institute is a national nonprofit dedicated to supporting profoundly gifted students through the following programs:

  • Fellows Scholarship
  • Young Scholars
  • Davidson Academy
  • THINK Summer Institute

  • Subscribe to the Davidson Institute's eNews-Update Newsletter >

    Free Gifted Resources & Guides >

    Who's Online Now
    0 members (), 167 guests, and 10 robots.
    Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
    Newest Members
    parentologyco, Smartlady60, petercgeelan, eterpstra, Valib90
    11,410 Registered Users
    March
    S M T W T F S
    1 2
    3 4 5 6 7 8 9
    10 11 12 13 14 15 16
    17 18 19 20 21 22 23
    24 25 26 27 28 29 30
    31
    Previous Thread
    Next Thread
    Print Thread
    Page 3 of 6 1 2 3 4 5 6
    Joined: Mar 2012
    Posts: 639
    A
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    A
    Joined: Mar 2012
    Posts: 639
    Originally Posted by Bostonian
    Originally Posted by Val
    Around here, teenagers in high-pressure school districts spend much of their summer vacations studying in the local libraries and elsewhere. They aren't there for the love of AP Calc; they're there because they're being compliant, and most of them look like they'd rather be somewhere else.
    Don't most adults spend their working lives "complying" in order to get paid? Are the teens spending several hours a day studying worse off than those who are working full time at entry level jobs in the summer? There should still be time for sports and socializing.
    I picked up my son from elementary sports camp yesterday - run by teen "camp counselors" and I am in a high pressure school district of the bay area - none of these teens running the camps in the full sun (close to 100 degrees) all day long seemed much happy about their jobs either - looked like they would rather be somewhere else. I think that if their parents sent them to the library or Starbucks to study AP calculus, they would have been more comfortable and happier.

    Joined: Mar 2013
    Posts: 1,489
    B
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    B
    Joined: Mar 2013
    Posts: 1,489
    While I agree that sexual assault is an issue on college campuses. What this article describes is happening even when students aren't sexually assaulted. I do know students who are/have attended top rated schools, who are either having a very hard time emotionally and/or had to drop out. Thankfully none have committed suicide. And I'm fairly certain that sexual harassment isn't the issue for the students I know about. Although I'll admit that I'm not necessarily going to know, what I do know matches very closely to the issues addressed in the article.

    One issue that is addressed in the article is that many top universities (particularly state schools in CA) make it almost impossible to take a semester/quarter/year off even for mental health issues. When I was a student I remember classmates that would take a semester off with little repercussions except their graduation date.

    Another huge issue is the need at many schools is you have to declare your major before starting university, or even when applying to university. And there isn't a good way to change if/when a student finds they are suited to a particular major.

    Joined: Apr 2013
    Posts: 5,244
    Likes: 1
    I
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    I
    Joined: Apr 2013
    Posts: 5,244
    Likes: 1
    What struck me when reading this article was the absolute shallowness and envy/jealousy of the kids who whined that others' lives looked better, even down to the photos of their meals on instagram.

    Many college students from families of modest financial means have learned from an early age that they do not have the same types of vacations, electronics, entertainment, enrichment opportunities, or photogenic meals which others may enjoy or take for granted. Possibly these students have learned to measure their success, accomplishment, and sense of personal well-being in healthier ways... often despite others trying to draw them into comparative, competitive, belittling conversations regarding such items as the shoes, etc., which they may be wearing.

    Some may say this article typifies kids being overly competitive and/or suffering from social myopia.

    Meanwhile those who look at the big picture, think long-term and keep things in perspective, value effort and feedback, who enjoy a challenge, have developed a strong work ethic, independent thinking, and the flexibility to adapt & alter their course as they navigate life... may remain undaunted by the drama which consumes others.

    Joined: Mar 2013
    Posts: 1,489
    B
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    B
    Joined: Mar 2013
    Posts: 1,489
    Originally Posted by ashley
    Originally Posted by Bostonian
    Originally Posted by Val
    Around here, teenagers in high-pressure school districts spend much of their summer vacations studying in the local libraries and elsewhere. They aren't there for the love of AP Calc; they're there because they're being compliant, and most of them look like they'd rather be somewhere else.
    Don't most adults spend their working lives "complying" in order to get paid? Are the teens spending several hours a day studying worse off than those who are working full time at entry level jobs in the summer? There should still be time for sports and socializing.
    I picked up my son from elementary sports camp yesterday - run by teen "camp counselors" and I am in a high pressure school district of the bay area - none of these teens running the camps in the full sun (close to 100 degrees) all day long seemed much happy about their jobs either - looked like they would rather be somewhere else. I think that if their parents sent them to the library or Starbucks to study AP calculus, they would have been more comfortable and happier.
    Where I live (not in Bay Area) many of the kids that take the hardest classes at H.S. spend the summer taking intense SAT prep all summer long. Elite - 5 hrs a day plus homework for 8 weeks and this is only for those who already score in the top 5% on a pretest. Many of these students want to be there since it's what their friends are doing and there is a high social status for getting in.

    Or "pretake" the classes they will be taking next year. 6-8 week courses preparing them for the AP & honors classes they will take the next year. I assume this happens in many area's of Palo Alto, Sunnyvale, etc as well. Spending the summer in the library studying AP Calc would be relaxing.

    Honestly if I had to work at a summer camp in the 100% heat I would probably not be happy either.

    Joined: Nov 2012
    Posts: 206
    T
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    T
    Joined: Nov 2012
    Posts: 206
    For some reason, I don't think the kids who studies 8 hours a day during summer are those who cared about photographing their meals for Instagram.

    I really think it is the idea that everything has to be effortless perfect that is toxic.

    Last edited by Thomas Percy; 07/28/15 11:16 AM.
    Joined: Jul 2011
    Posts: 2,007
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    Joined: Jul 2011
    Posts: 2,007

    Can we all at least agree that the appropriate term is "snowplow" parents and not lawnmower parents?

    Because the snowplow dumps the snow onto other people making it their problem while keeping their kids on the nice plowed track.

    Joined: Feb 2010
    Posts: 2,639
    B
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    B
    Joined: Feb 2010
    Posts: 2,639
    Originally Posted by indigo
    What struck me when reading this article was the absolute shallowness and envy/jealousy of the kids who whined that others' lives looked better, even down to the photos of their meals on instagram.
    They are not unusual:

    New Study Links Facebook To Depression: But Now We Actually Understand Why.
    by Alice G. Walton
    Forbes
    April 8, 2015

    Quote
    The irony of Facebook is by now known to most. The “social” network has been linked to a surprising number of undesirable mental health consequences: Depression, low self-esteem, and bitter jealousy among them. Now, a new study in the Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology finds that not only do Facebook and depressive symptoms go hand-in-hand, but the mediating factor seems to be a well-established psychological phenomenon: “Social comparison.” That is, making comparisons, often between our most humdrum moments and our friends “highlight reels” – the vacation montages and cute baby pics – is what links Facebook time and depressive symptoms together. So is it time to cut down on Facebook? Maybe. Or maybe we should just adjust our attitude toward it.

    In the new study from University of Houston, the researchers queried people about their Facebook use, how likely they were to make social comparisons (e.g., ”I always pay a lot of attention to how I do things compared with how others do things”), and how often they experienced depressive symptoms. It turned out that people who used Facebook more tended to have more depressive symptoms – but social comparison was a mediating factor only for men.

    Joined: Feb 2011
    Posts: 5,181
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    Joined: Feb 2011
    Posts: 5,181
    Originally Posted by JonLaw
    Can we all at least agree that the appropriate term is "snowplow" parents and not lawnmower parents?

    Because the snowplow dumps the snow onto other people making it their problem while keeping their kids on the nice plowed track.

    Good point. Mulching is not exactly what is happening to bystanders.

    I still think that the result is topiary children, however. Hedge trimmers. They seem benign enough until you look at the results.


    Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.
    Joined: Feb 2010
    Posts: 2,639
    B
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    B
    Joined: Feb 2010
    Posts: 2,639
    Originally Posted by bluemagic
    Where I live (not in Bay Area) many of the kids that take the hardest classes at H.S. spend the summer taking intense SAT prep all summer long. Elite - 5 hrs a day plus homework for 8 weeks and this is only for those who already score in the top 5% on a pretest.
    The SAT tests middle school math. The best students should not be needing intense SAT math prep in the summer before 12th grade, and nothing I've seen indicates that intense prep works for SAT verbal or writing.

    Joined: Apr 2015
    Posts: 647
    E
    Member
    Offline
    Member
    E
    Joined: Apr 2015
    Posts: 647
    What does "a mediating factor" mean? Is it saying men are more likely to judge themselves harshly than women are as a result of social media? (No time to read the article right now, but really interested.)

    Anecdotally--that's not been my experience at all. I work as a counselor Facebook comes up all the time (and not in a good way). Girls/women seem much more vulnerable to negative self-comparisons, to me.

    In terms of resilience, jealousy, etc., I wouldn't be too quick to judge parents/young adults/adolescents, etc. as having character flaws that make this social (media) comparison worse. It's really a new language for all of us--and adults are also vulnerable. In the good old days, we weren't constantly bombarded with imagery of others' perfect lives. Steep learning curve.

    I think we're all in danger of "judging our insides by other people's outsides" in the new paradigm. I hope articles like this help raise our collective consciousness so we can have thoughtful conversations with our children about perception v. reality.

    Page 3 of 6 1 2 3 4 5 6

    Moderated by  M-Moderator 

    Link Copied to Clipboard
    Recent Posts
    Testing with accommodations
    by aeh - 03/27/24 01:58 PM
    Quotations that resonate with gifted people
    by indigo - 03/27/24 12:38 PM
    For those interested in astronomy, eclipses...
    by indigo - 03/23/24 06:11 PM
    California Tries to Close the Gap in Math
    by thx1138 - 03/22/24 03:43 AM
    Gifted kids in Illinois. Recommendations?
    by indigo - 03/20/24 05:41 AM
    Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5